Erica Jong

Erica Jong

Posted: January 10, 2008 12:55 PM

Seeing Sexism

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It's not easy to see sexism. It's such a part of our lives it seems invisible. It's in us and outside us. We want not to believe in it---until something---like men making fun of Hillary Clinton, like women making fun of Hillary Clinton---stirs it up. And then something inside our heads shouts: "THERE IT IS AGAIN! I thought--I truly hoped we were past this."

The truth is, we want sexism to be passé. We don't want to keep fighting it. It's so uncool to fight it. We sound so shrill, so whining, so strident, so piercing, so shrewish, so female. For these are all coded adjectives for women you hate. We hate them ourselves. We don't want to be shrill, shrewish, strident, whining, piercing. We want to be cool. We want to hold our own, we want not to waver, not to be high-pitched, not to betray our femaleness, our weakness. And yet our voices are higher than men's and we are less listened to in the agora. We are always tokens.

On most charitable boards I sit, on every prize committee I deliberate, on most writers' panels, I am a token. One woman and seven men, two women and fourteen men, three women and twenty-one men. I hate being a token. I wish it were otherwise. Unlike those nasty women of yesteryear--Clare Boothe Luce, Ilka Chase--the women who inspired The Women--I have no stake in being queen bee. I want a 50--50 world. But the world is not that way. So tedious, old-time feminism must rear its shrieking Medusa head again.

The Greeks got it. Medusa's snaky head, the sex-strike in Lysistrata, Medea's fury in Greek myth and tragedy.

The truth is we have been trying to assert women's rights (and wrongs) for a long time. Too, too long, in fact. No wonder everyone is turned off. From Mary Wollstonecraft to Susan B. Anthony to Eleanor Roosevelt to Germaine Greer to Gloria Steinem is at least two and a half centuries. And before that, Mary Magdalene was smeared by the damned disciples, Cleopatra by Shakespeare, Hatshepsut by all those Egyptian dudes and doubtless even the Sumerian earth goddess. Too fat, too shrill, too monomaniacal, say the cool men. And the cool women echo it.

What? Life begins in the womb? Women are the life force? How unfair! Didn't Samuel Johnson--that old bore, say: "Nature has given women so much power that the law wisely gives her little" The Greek tragedians smeared a lot of women too, but they were shrewder observers of life than our present day guy writers. At least they had the myths to set them straight. So they knew women were fierce from being raped so often and they knew the rapists (usually men) deserved everything they got.

So now we have the cool dudes saying Hillary is dead, the fall of the house of Clinton is here, baby-boomers are so over, don't trust those wrinklies (British for your parents' generation), youth is roaring again, hope is the watchword, Obama has a feminist wife and two cute little girls, he'll fight for us. And the cool chicks echo it: Hillary is over, we have our rights, we have the pill, we have the patch, we have the IUD, we have the vote, we have nannies for our kids, so what about the retrenchment on Roe, so what about the Right to Lifers, so what about my mother's battles? Over and done. Passe. Youth has come in the person of Barack. Male? Not really. Think of his wife. Two for the price of one--like Billary in 1992. But will Ms. Obama be the prez? Not really. Power behind the throne. Same old, same old. We seem to have forgotten that we did this all before.

But it's different this time, say the women of my daughter's generation. We've won the battle. We don't need the White House. Say what? We don't need it? We're past it? We have all heard that before, too. It's an old, old story. Hillary is the establishment? Hillary stole the vote in New Hampshire? Hillary is passé. Hillary is too close to Bill. Hillary is not close enough to Bill. Hillary is calculating. Hillary is cold. Hillary cried. (Actually, she didn't cry -- as Jon Stewart and I pointed out). She just looked human. She showed a teeny bit of vulnerability. UNFAIR! They scream. FEMININE WILES! They scream. The heart of being a woman is to be always in the wrong.

Let's be honest here. We don't know how a female President would act. But we could look around. I know America is a provincial country, but we could look at Germany, Ireland, England, Pakistan, India, Argentina, and Finland--to name a few. We could ask why the USA, out of all the so-called "civilized" countries, is so damned afraid of a woman leader.

We could look at the invisible sexism--as Gloria Steinem has been asking us to do for nearly half a century. We could acknowledge that a multiracial male president with a fierce feminist wife would be great for America, but maybe we should break the invisible gender barrier first. Yes, blacks have been hideously oppressed, but so have women--and black women know this better than white women do. We have been tokens for so long that most of us just take it for granted. The flaying of Hillary Clinton shows us we can take nothing for granted. We need to break that tough, annealed, glass ceiling with the barbed wire over it. And we need to break it now.

If this is the politics of gender, so be it. We need a politics of gender in this country. Obama is a good man who will only get better. Youth is on his side. Perhaps Hillary will appoint him to the Supreme Court where he can counter that embarrassing Clarence Thomas. Perhaps he will be President in 2016 or perhaps, even better, Michelle Obama will be. They have nothing but time.

Hillary's time has come.

 
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- olympia72 I'm a Fan of olympia72 2 fans permalink

I find ebbtide's declaration that "young women today are not stuck in the world of feminism" both dangerously naive and frankly offensive. Whatever way you look at it, young women are reaping the benefits of what crusty old feminists accomplished way back then. The conservative Christian (and kick ass) female trainer at my gym? She's reaping the benefits. Female, Republican talking heads who disparage other women? Yep, they're reaping the benefits too. As for "bright young women" in general who are somehow above acknowledging the sacrifices made on their behalf, all too many of them are, let's face it, concerned with being sexy. Appreciating the efforts un-sexy women made on their behalf? Well, that's just un-sexy in and of itself. Barack Obama is what's sexy- his adoring media told us so!

Sometimes, I wish today's young women could live through a few days of what life used to be like for women. No birth control. No equal standing with men, any which way. A strict dress code. Having to drug yourself because your limited life had you THAT sad. Maybe they would appreciate the efforts Steinem, Jong, and Co. made for them then.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:57 PM on 01/10/2008

Erica, right on! Women will not stand for the marginalization of Hillary - as the best choice we have to take the White House. It's damn past time that women stopped following cool men around and really became cool and powerful themselves. When I saw Oprah with Obama, I thought - how sadly familiar. Another woman behind a man. Very retro.

Hillary will win because women cannot wait any longer. The male-run world is a complete mess and is danger of complete collapse.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:33 PM on 01/10/2008

Our great democracy is based on the fundamental principle that the people can choose anyone whom they see fit to lead the country.

The people have overwhelmingly voiced their support for a candidate more in touch with contemporary issues, challenges and the capability and integrity to meet them.

Barack Obama 08' - Together, yes we can!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:27 PM on 01/10/2008

The problem boils down to this: People don't trust HRC, because she is not genuine and tries to reinvent and 'revise' her policies and positions based on what is popular at the moment.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:24 PM on 01/10/2008
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I'm supporting Obama. If Clinton wins the nomination she will get my vote in the general. She would make a fine president, but I believe Obama would make a better one. We need a multi-cultural, optimistic administration to undo the partisanship and the damage to our constitution and our leadership standing in the world community. Obama can best exemplify that -- which we need right now -- not 8 years from now. The argument put forth here by Jong, and in the NYT by Steinem seems to be that we must elect Clinton because she's a woman, and it is long overdue. If you want to play the old-Democrat/Clinton/Boomer game of identity politics for another half generation, then go ahead. Decree everyone vote her or his gender and hope women come out big in November. Is this what you're saying? Or have I misread you, and you idea to offer a supreme court seat to Obama -- an African-American seat apparently, as you specifically recommend the to counter-balance Clarence Thomas. All the better to keep him out of the way for you other favorite figure: Michelle Obama, who you also consider a better presidential prospect than her husband. I wonder what you will do if Clinton does fail to get the nomination? Urge her to run as an independent? Clearly gender is your only criterion. This does simply things for you I imagine, and would continue to do so through a Clinton administration. Any criticism of Clinton will be instantly dismissed as sexism. What an improvement this will be. But that is what you ask for when you insist on identity politics. Think of where we are right now, where the campaign of front-runner (yes, Clinton -- a woman) actually see increased participation by YOUNG PEOPLE as a DANGER to their cause. How far we have come since the "comeback kid" ran as the kid from Hope seeking to build a bridge to the 21st Century, sixteen years ago. Who knew then that the Clinton's would work so hard one day to burn that bridge behind them?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:11 PM on 01/10/2008
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Posts like this offend me. You can get all the old girls out of the woodwork if you like, and you can deride younger woman who happen to dislike Hilary because of her policy, and her shift to the right, among other things. It will not sway me.

Her experience is that of a Washington insider, her politics the same, from what I can tell. Now she is the change candidate. She is a chameleon

I agree the male pundits treat her ridiculously, practically ejaculating when they can deride her, though they did have to grovel a little after New Hampshire. The overt sexism is clear, it sickens me, I clearly aware of it. That is not a reason for me to choose her as my candidate.

As a twenty-three year old woman I am disturbed to find older women are so gullible and easily convinced, by a silly wave of feminist nostalgia, to vote for a candidate who has always had her sites set on the big house. There is a certain degree of ambition involved in running for this office. It is my opinion that Hilary's ambition outweighs her desire to serve.

I will not be voting for her just because a woman's time has come.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:01 PM on 01/10/2008
- bethinCary I'm a Fan of bethinCary 9 fans permalink

My 14 yr old daughter said the same thing today. She overhead a talking head on TV and asked"so women are supposed to vote for HRC becasue she's a woman? THAT'S what's sexist!"
I said 'Yep, you're right--I've never thought of it that way..."

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:00 PM on 01/10/2008
- mawrm I'm a Fan of mawrm 24 fans permalink

Hillary Clinton running as a female president is quickly becoming the political equivalent of Al Sharpton running as a black president - you HAVE to support her, otherwise you're sexist!
How can a woman who heavily pads her resume with her husband's accomplishments be seen as empowering escapes me. "Instead of study hard, work hard, you're smart, you can do it:, the lesson instead seems to be "marry well and you TOO can become president".

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 08:53 PM on 01/10/2008
- avicenna I'm a Fan of avicenna 25 fans permalink
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Sexism is making voting for Hillary because she is a woman and one thinks this is how to win the white house for women. Wrong. People who are betting on Hillary's experience are actually holding on to the days of Clinton old (you know, that guy who spends his days plays golf with Bush Sr?) I say this as a woman who has never considered her position as someone with a budding career in the sciences as a token. Both Obama and Hillary have characteristics which are novel in a real Presidential Candidate. Obama is the first non-Caucasian to having a real shot because he exudes not only inspiration but a sense of integrity and honesty that appeals to people who are tuned into those traits and see them as desirable in a leader. Clinton's experience has already detracted from that sheen. America hasn't ever had a female leader because of the personality of the country is often reflected in its chosen leader. America has traditionally been seen as an aggressive, domineering, and militarily focused country - not characteristics that are often exuded by women. Countries that are growing and seeking compromise are often quite comfortable having a woman in charge as she is usually better able to negotiate deals and organize what needs to be done to ensure every reaches their potential. Can either Obama and Clinton run without it being very much noted that they are the first to represent a certain group that has never seen the light of the white house thrown? Unlikely - and we shouldn't be hypocritical about it. But it would be foolhardy to elect either because of race or gender rather then who would be better able to put America back together again after it fell off the wall.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 08:25 PM on 01/10/2008
- mawrm I'm a Fan of mawrm 24 fans permalink

"It's Hillary's time" simply because by some nebulous social clock "it's time to elect a woman president." Are we then to assume by this same social clock that in say 2024, it will be "time to elect an Asian president"? Who sets this social clock? To suggest that because other European countries have had women leaders, it's somehow now time for America to "join the fad" with no attention to the quality of the woman leadership you're choosing is extremely insulting to the intelligence of women IMHO. Why not compare their resumes to Hillary Clinton's? You'll find HRC's sorely lacking and successful women leaders don't count their time as First Lady as "experience" to run a nation! You wouldn't trust your life to the non-pilot wife of a pilot who says "I know what I'm doing. I've flown with my husband many times", so why the presidency? And then using this whole "who's suffered more" as a basis to further justify yourself - by your broken formula, a black woman president should be a higher priority. And truth be told, Dr. Condoleeza Rice is FAR more experienced and qualified to be president of this nation than the entire remaining Democratic field, so why haven't I seen your ilk championing her running? It's not about a woman president, it's about WHICH woman, as it would similarly be the case of WHICH White/Black/Asian man, etc. And for many, Hillary Clinton is NOT the woman that folks want to see president.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 08:19 PM on 01/10/2008
- mvpeach10 I'm a Fan of mvpeach10 5 fans permalink

I LIVE IN ATLANTA with many women friends who are Democrats, Independents, and Republicans. they are outraged at the brutal media battering of Hillary Clinton by the media. We are sick of the hatred for a woman who has done nothing to generate these mean-spirited and destructive comments coming out of the TV, Radio, and newsprint media. Trust me,if they keep this up, we will fight her battle for her, and you know how we will do it, with the ballot. Chris Matthews has to calm himself down, along with the radio loudmouths, Hannity, Limbaugh, etc. And the NYT is a disgrace taking after her and lauding Obama. Who is he...the Audacity of Audacity should be the title. Just an upstart with a gift of oratory that is without real substance, and no record of achievement to boot.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:56 PM on 01/10/2008

i fully agree with everything you have stated. i am still in high school ,and won't get to vote for this term, but if i could i would most definitly vote for hillary. Men have run the country since it began, and i believe that it is time for that to change. A woman president could completly change this country, where all men are considered equal. If we are all EQUAL, then why is everyone against having a woman president?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:54 PM on 01/10/2008
- PCC I'm a Fan of PCC permalink

Obama is as calculating as can be. He uses teleprompters while pretending that he is speaking off the cuff. He employs FOUR
pollsters. He attacks Hillary personally and viciously at every oportunity while pretending that he is not. He is a marketing phenomenon without depth or real accomplishment. He appeals to trendy, affluent dilettantes, like an iPhone or Starbucks. But read what Consumer Reports has to say about the iPhone. And there are a lot of people who can't afford Starbucks.

Hillary actually bridges the gap between those who are genuinely struggling and those in power. She has a life-long commitment to those who struggle--she was working on universal health care for the uninsured in 1992 (!), long before anyone else really engaged the issue. Hillary won in New Hampshire because she is actually talking in a competent way about policies that will really help. The true measure of her commitment is this: Those who are struggling are voting for her by big margins. And they don't own iPhones.
Obama is calculating and a cool dude, but what we need is a capable and caring president.
Obama has repeatedly made policy statements that would produce chaos on the issues they were meant to address--on foreign affairs, on health care, and on the mortgage crisis. We need a better reality, not glitz and trendiness.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:47 PM on 01/10/2008
- apcalc I'm a Fan of apcalc 2 fans permalink

Sexism is so pervasive. To the young people (especially young women) who think it is passe.........

Remember when Imus called the Rutgers women basketball players "nappy headed Hos"? What were all the pundits yacking about? That the comments were racist. Al Sharpton was all over the TV talking about the racist comment.

What were the Rutgers women themselves talking about? What made them so angry? If you watched them and heard their news conference, they were upset at being called "Hos". Coach Vivian Stringer said they were young women of accomplishment and deserved much better that being called "Hos".

Women know. Men, as a group, don't know or don't choose to know.

Just watch and listen to the male pundits and commentators. They are ridiculously hard on Hillary. What? She laughed? What was the laugh like? A hearty laugh? She cried ? (which she did not do) Was it a breakdown? On and on it goes.........

Go Hillary - kick their arses up and down the street. And know your sisters will be right behind you.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:44 PM on 01/10/2008
- suki21693 I'm a Fan of suki21693 10 fans permalink

Feminism was not an appropriate marketing tool in the 1970s when they used it to sell perfume and cigarettes and it is not an appropriate marketing tool to try and sell us on a candidate either.

I have not yet decided for whom I will vote, but no candidate will sell me on the basis of such a flimsy qualification as the lack of a Y chromosome. The very idea is insulting and demeaning to women everywhere. I will make my decision based on my perception of the candidates qualifications. Because, just like a man, I can actually think for myself. And, just like a man, Hillary Clinton deserves the respect of being judged on her own merits.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:30 PM on 01/10/2008
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