You Betcha She's Doggone Cute
Sarah Palin is a character out of Lewis Carroll. No one can translate that smile. She's the Cheshire Cat.
She says nothing and she grins triumphantly. Her smile lingers when the words have gone.
Nothing she says makes sense but the eyelashes never stop batting. Catch phrases and buzz words bounce in the air above her head. She adores the word "also." Also, she adores herself. She is so doggone cute she turns herself on.
She is the woman politician advertisers have been waiting for -- all style and no substance. Full of confidence and full of beans, the walk of feminism without the talk. Nobody can object because there's nothing to object to. Hillary Clinton and Geraldine Ferraro had ideas you could disagree with. But Sarah Palin is perky and inscrutable at once, you betcha. She talks. We listen but we have no idea what's been said.
She is the female candidate of GOP dreams. She talks, she smiles, she flirts, she never opposes. She makes mistakes but nobody seems to care. We watch her lips go up, go down, go sideways. We watch her eyes glisten behind rimless glasses. The beauty pageant promoters removed her soul so it wouldn't get in the way. How can we dismiss her or debate her? She's a bubble. She's fizz.
She is the perfection of beauty pageant womanhood. All image, no ideas. Camera-ready for hair and lipstick commercials. Her patriotism is of the Fourth of July variety. Let's eat a heck of a lot of hot dogs, pun intended.
She's pure as a sex-phone operator. You can fantasize but not touch. The bill comes later.
She reminds me of Paris Hilton -- who once tried to trademark the expression "That's hot." Will Palin trademark "You betcha"? Or "doggone"? Or "team of mavericks"? I wouldn't put it past her. Whatever happens with the "election" the endorsements will come flooding in. Maybelline will want her. And Kellogg's. And Wal-Mart. Some publisher must already have an offer on the table.
Sarah Palin has already won the Olympics of reality TV. She'll do just fine. As for the rest of us -- I'm not so sure.
Read more reactions to the Biden-Palin Vice Presidential debate from HuffPost bloggers
Loading comments…
Want to reply to a comment? Hint: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to
Garisson Keillor is intelligent and has class. Sarah Palin is a wolf in sheep's clothing, and it is completely terrifying to me that she is 2 heartbeats away from representing us as a nation.
I've got to ask: are you guys embarrassed? (from down under)
does it show?
Embarrassed? You betcha.
Beyond words.
More than you could possibly know... If they win, we're moving out of the country. Bush was humiliating. This is beyond words.
Unfortunately with Bush in office for the past 8 years with his lack of intellect and critical thinking skills has set the bar very low to the point where people actually believe that Palin is even ready to be a VP, much less the president. The prospect is beyond scary - it represents a total melt down of common sense in our society.
I am sincerely hoping that this free wheeling Palin is given enough freedom to speak her mind and begins to entrap herself because she feels that she can do no wrong.
Now doggone it, why'd have to go and ask such a silly question? Why, I betcha the liberal MSM is behind all this
Massively, yes. Although it seems her poll trajectory rivals that of the stock market itself, lately.
Hopeful that people seem to realize she's an empty skirt, furious at McCain for thinking she'll attract women voters and persuade us to vote very much against our own best interests. Americans unfortunately are capable of great stupidity at the ballot box but perhaps not THIS stupid. If there's a silver lining to the whole economic crisis though it's shocked people into thinking seriously and being less inclined to be distracted by trivial issues, and got them thinking they'd better vote their pocket books this year.
Sarah Palin isa more of an attraction to the hormonal, drunk Young Americans for Freedom vote than she's a draw for thinking women.
Being There's Chance the gardner, Invasion of the Vidiots.
The VP aura, the Governor aura - these are distractions. She talks like a jock, it's sideline ("Hi, Mom!") jockspeak. She's a good athlete, talking backwards and wearing heels.
Living in the microcosm of vapid, shallow, vacuous, pretentious, sexy-gets-you-in that is LA, I see and interact with Sarah Palin everyday, all day.
We all know this woman, and have known her since junior high. She hasn't evolved.
SPs don't follow the rules...they don't bother to obtain and process facts...they don't waste precious I'm-your-ultimate-fantasy-wink-wink face time being cerebral...they don't extend themselves beyond their comfort zone...they don't walk-the-walk...they don't answer the questions...they don't engage in meaningful dialogue...and, they don't respect nor care about what you and I think about them. Their goal: to get over as they always have...since junior high. And it works for 'em (vernacular shout-out to Wasilla).
SPs are NOT "mavericks", NOT VP material, and they are NOT cute.
Let’s be real: we know her. And, what is truly frightening is that one of the people vying for the office of leading the free world is counting on us not recognizing her for who she is. It is the ultimate insult.
Obama should not comment on Palin,because,she can only bring him down to her level,she win he loose he should leave that task to Bidden.Moreover,Obama is in a roll ,he has gain ground,go Obama go.
How can Palin not be embarrassed for herself?
Is this what republican men really think about women?
Are you kidding , she loves the attention and she knows how to strut her stuff, how do you think she has gotten where she is at? Surely not her brilliance! Wink, wink..... "ya betcha".... "bless ya"......then a stab to the back!!! Never trust someone who winks and flashes a painted on smile!
Never trust someone who winks and flashes a painted on smile!
As they stab away
If you ever considered writing a book about her, I would by one.
22% of the people still think GW is doing a good job. Almost half the people still don"t realize that McSame is a republican. The outright lies that the neo-cons, the media, and the pundits are spewing is out of control. 911 happened on GW's watch, he lied to the people to start a war, and the economy is dire straights. Wink, Wink, Wink don't think, think, think. Yup, you betcha.
" The lights are on...No ones home"...Sarah in a nutshell.
In case nobody's has said it, allow me to quote Lou Grant:
"You know what, kid? You've got spunk! [pause] I hate spunk!"
Cheers,
Do we have to use Sarah as an excuse to attack people with northern accents? Mr Garrison Keiller has one too, and you don't attack him as ignorant.
Because he's NOT ignorant!
I dearly love Mr Keiller, but he is not running for VP.
It's about time. You Yankees have been making fun of southern accents for years. You can dish it out, but you can't take it. I mean, Y'all can dish it out, but y'all cain't take it.
Two things: First, according to many Alaskans, she does not have an Alaskan accent. It is reminiscent of a North Dakota accent, but where would she get that? Second, most criticism of her speech is not about the accent but about the intonation--a tight, high-pitched, irritating tone--which is well within a person's ability to adjust, if she cares how she comes across. Part of the concern is that she comes across as someone who has not matured and is stuck in a little-girl or beauty-pageant-contestant frame of mind. She does not sound like an adult.
Just in case no one's mentioned it, she doesn't have an Idaho accent either, which is where she was born and went to several of her colleges, including the one she graduated from. Her family is from there (the Heath's) and my family knows a few of them that are still there. No way, no how, no Idaho accent. The last time I heard that accent was in the movie Fargo or perhaps Ria Perlman and John Candy in Canadian Bacon. Life imitates art.
Sarah Palin is an Edsel. Not enough people know about Ford's fiasco that should serve as an example of the limits of merchandising. Ford was losing market share and launched an advertising blitz heralding the arrival of their new car that would give the consumer an unmatched blend of engineering, style, and luxury. The public eagerly awaited the unveiling of the Edsel as teasing ads whetted their appetites. Inside Ford, marketing "experts" took a tail fin from here, a swatch of fabric from there, and adorned the front with perky chrome. When the Edsel was unveiled, nobody liked what they saw and nobody bought it. Palin is the same. Rovian marketers took a slice of interest groups here, a piece of fake populism here, and a perky front end and came up with a hollow product. Now that Palin is being fully unveiled, the market is responding. The more they see, the less they like. However, as you suggest, as with the Edsel, nostalgia might overcome common sense and we'll see Palin stick around as an interesting oddity that's famous for being famous.
Neither John McCain nor Sarah Palin are mustangs, Edsels, yes. Downsize them with a 1500 cc 4 banger, crash resistant bumpers & a 5 speed gear box for 2012. Maybe sell it as a hybrid, who knows?
With one little problem.......she has to be he center of attention or she gets mean. I mean she didn't like Katie putting her on the spot so what does she do? She publicly lashes out against Couric and says Couric "annoyed" her. During her debate with Biden, she says "you may not like what I say or how I say it, but ........". Clearly she's comfortable when she's duking it out but not when she has to take it. Let's not forget one other thing...beauty fades fast!!! Four years leaves plenty of time to find another younger, hotter looking Palin lookalike for the Democratic Party. Palin? Four years from now I guarantee you'll see the first signs of wrinkles that does nothing to her charm.
Ms. Jong, you do have a way of putting things in perspective. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Go ahead and cry yourself a river, YellerDawg. That such emptiness as Palin could ever become the world's biggest cause celebre is a sign of degredation most profound.
Ummm..my nickname is the Cheshire Cat because of my big smile. Please don't further insult Cheshire Cats. I know Cheshire Cats and Sarah Palin is no Cheshire Cat.
Apart from that, great column Ms. Jong!
OBAMA-BIDEN '08 - if you care about women's rights!
You must be logged in to comment. Log in or connect with
