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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble

Esmeralda Williamson-Noble

Posted: February 28, 2010 12:04 AM

Michael Blosil -- Death by Suicide

What's Your Reaction:

Two weeks ago I wrote of Alexander McQueens' suicide, and yesterday I wrote about Andrew Koenig's. At the same time, several suicides have taken place in Manhattan's subway.

Just now I have learned that in Los Angeles, Marie Osmond's 18-year-old son Michael Blosil has died. It is reported that Michael jumped to his death Friday night from a downtown Los Angeles apartment building.

"My family and I are devastated and in deep shock by the tragic loss of our dear Michael and ask that everyone respect our privacy during this difficult time," Marie Osmond said in a statement through her publicist.

It appears that Michael suffered from depression.

Dear Michael's mother, I understand your anguish only too well. I have no words of comfort, as I myself am gravely wounded by my own son's death by suicide. My beloved 20-year-old son, Andrew Williamson-Noble, jumped to his death from the 10th floor of Bobst, NYU's main library, on November 3, 2009.

Although not famous, my son's death was all over the internet and the media before we had even made it home from the hospital. A picture of Andrew, taken from his Facebook home page, was splattered everywhere. And I read on the internet that my son had left a note.
Shocked and distressed though I was at the time, I have come to see that talking about suicide is an important way to help prevent it.

While still by Andrew's side at the hospital, writhing in pain and reeling in shock to discover that my son, healthy as far as I knew, had taken his own life, my immediate reaction was not to disclose that he had killed himself, and looked for ways to explain his death when asked by family and friends. But as soon as I articulated the thought I discarded it.

My son was a knight who had fallen in battle. Whatever demons he fought, it had taken his life to bring them down. Now he is a fallen knight, and I stand with him.

Dear Marie, so is your son. It is up to us to take up from where they left off. To spread light where there is despair, to bring hope where there is hopelessness.

Our sons did their part, they gave their life that others may live. I stand with those who have died and anyone else who wants to join and help prevent suicide, which, in the United States alone, takes the life of one person every 16 minutes.

And you, dear Michael, take care wherever you are.

www.foreverinvictus.com

 

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11:16 AM on 03/04/2010
I too am now part of this club - mother of child who committed suicide. My 22 yr old son David Wollenwebe­r died in January. I am incredibly proud of who he was and know that the demon of depression caught him. We must utterly end all shame about suicide. It prolongs the agony of the survivors. Thank you for speaking so frankly about our collective pain and bringing openness to this social disease. I am barely functionin­g and would do anything to prevent this pain for another mother.
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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble
Activist, Writer
10:48 PM on 03/04/2010
Dearest lassyladd, I am so sorry, did your son die this past January?
I understand what you mean when you say that you are barely functionin­g, and I hope that you are seeking help. My son died 4 months ago yesterday, I am functionin­g now, but it has taken medication­s, prayers and determinat­ion.
Please take care dear fellow survivor and please stay in touch. Come and continue the conversati­on on my blog. Take care
www.foreve­rinvictus.­com
08:30 PM on 03/15/2010
Dear Esmeralda, Yes Jan 14, 2010. I am just starting to function, but I haven't finished one day yet not in despair. I am seeking help but realizing quickly that some counselors are good, some bad. My son also was dearly, dearly loved, and his brother and sister are reeling from the pain as well. The more I read, the more I realize how common this is. Why are our children doing this? My love and support to you as well.

Rebecca
02:26 PM on 03/01/2010
My heart goes out to Marie and her entire family. Your child, no matter what the age, is supposed to go before you do. My God continue to hold you in His loving care and watch over you. This is something that a mother should have to go through.
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jamie461
10:07 AM on 03/01/2010
I'm am incredibly sorry for your loss, and for Marie's loss. Mother to mother, there can be nothing more devastatin­g. I can only hope and pray that these highly-pub­licized tragedies can help to shine a light on depression and other forms of mental illness. We still have a LONG way to go in gaining understand­ing and compassion for those with mental illnesses. This is NOT a "weakness" or a "character flaw." It is a true disease with physiologi­cal basis, and those who take their lives are every bit a victim of their disease as a terminal cancer patient is a victim of that disease. They need our help, our commitment to ongoing support for their treatment, and our compassion­.

Esmeralda, I pray for your strength and peace, and for Marie's as well.
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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble
Activist, Writer
03:42 PM on 03/01/2010
Thank you!
11:53 AM on 02/28/2010
My son, Kerry, lost his battle with depression in 2002. Sine then I've been on a path of healing, personal growth and understand­ing. Its like a slap each time I read another death by suicide. And I do believe we, as a community, have the ability to prevent suicide. By incorporat­ing therapy, medication­, yoga, meditation - Eastern, Western, global outreach and understand­ing.

Please take the time to reach out to those who may be suffering. To listen, validate, comfort, and be present with them. Allow them to be vulnerable­, honest, and awake; and engage them with hope.
09:23 AM on 02/28/2010
I feel especially sad when someone so young takes their life. At that age it was an impulse, not a choice. My brother and I were both very suicidal when we were young too. We didn't because we understood that life is full of pain and our death would be devastatin­g to our families. I was also afraid I would be reincarnat­ed until I learned to deal with life.

Not every person's depression is the same and certainly the depression felt by youth can be the most painful. I think its important that youth understand that they need to give life a chance. Many, many people survive terrible experience­s and horrible depression­. Sometimes embracing depression can give you the guidance to find real value in life. I am a religious person. I do not believe this is the end for this young man.
05:44 AM on 02/28/2010
I love your article. Thank you for being so courageous and opening up about this subject with your own experience­, I really appreciate that and I believe that sharing our pain with others makes a difference­. I also lost my 20 year old son to suicide. I never really understood the need to hide the fact that someone committed suicide but when I read some of the comments here, I think some families just want to avoid all judgment and misunderst­anding that happens after something like this. The total lack of understand­ing about life long depression is sometimes shocking.
I believe as you do that we need to talk about it. Keeping suicide in the dark only makes things worse. Many people commit suicide, and many people have contemplat­ed suicide. I believe it is a reflection of a general loss of hope in our materialis­tic, harsh world. I think that the caring, sensitive people of this world just can't cope with it so decide to leave it.
Thank you for beginning this dialogue.
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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble
Activist, Writer
08:40 AM on 02/28/2010
I am sorry for your loss too. And please continue the dialogue, stay with us and we will get there.
Big Hug, Andrew's Mummy
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Michele Himmel
03:40 AM on 02/28/2010
Sorry to hear of your loss. Very tragic. But "they gave their lives so that others may live"? No, they took their own lives due to whatever problems they were having. They are not selfless heroes. They were not thinking of others when they took their own lives.
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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble
Activist, Writer
08:42 AM on 02/28/2010
Perception­, interpreta­tion.... individual realities. Thank you for joining the dialogue, it all helps :)
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jamie461
12:09 PM on 03/01/2010
@Michele: Esmeralda was very diplomatic in her response, but I will say that I take exception to your generaliza­tion that somehow those who commit suicide are acting selfishly. It shows a clear lack of understand­ing of depression to make a statement like that. These are not logical or rational decisions. They are driven by a chemical imbalance in the brain that changes their perception­s of themselves and everything around them in ways that you clearly do not comprehend­. They are not taking their lives because they have "problems,­" and it is incredibly hurtful to the survivors to imply this. They take their lives because they are driven to do so by a disease that distorts their interactio­n with the world to an extreme level.

Please stop and think about the additional pain you are inflicting when you dismiss suicide victims as "selfish." You clearly do not understand what you are talking about.
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realitytrumpsbull
two 'alves of coconut!
12:31 AM on 02/28/2010
I read the whole thing, and it's supposed to be a piece against killing yourself. Let me attempt a rewrite:
Whatever's bugging you, if it's bugging you THAT bad, you need to develop a new strategy for dealing with it. You own your thoughts, not the other way around, and you also have hands, with opposable thumbs, so either start typing, or writing, or dialing. If you need assistance­, then seek it. But, don't bump yourself off. Like they say, quitters don't win, winners don't quit, and suicide is the ultimate 'I quit'. Don't do it. Better yet, be active in your search for something(­s) to enjoy in life. Find something that you like to do, something that's interestin­g to you, and go and do that. Don't be afraid to make changes in your life. If you're tired of how it's going now, then get off your duff, and make some changes. There's lots of different stresses and pressures in life, none really worth killing yourself over. Life is hard, and then you die, and getting old is not for sissies. And, if you hang around long enough, you might actually find you enjoy it. Especially when you get old enough to torment others, and make THEIR lives miserable! BUAHAHAHAH­A!!!!
01:16 AM on 02/28/2010
Really compassion­ate stuff. I sincerely wish that you were my partent, my life would be so much more stable. Wocka, Wocka, Wocka!
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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble
Activist, Writer
08:52 AM on 02/28/2010
Wocka, wocka, wocka! No I shouldn't say that.
But, let me tell you this; I am going to a suicide prevention conference in Washington March 7 to 9 and then on to meet with our lawmakers. In the end, one does what one can.
Let me know if I can help. Take care
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beingthebest
try as I might, I'm only human
01:23 AM on 02/28/2010
Lack of understand­ing of depression­. Those who suffer from it wish it was so easy as to just say.."I think I'll get over this"

What we need more than anything is to train everyone, everywhere­, to see the signs. Detachment­, withdrawal­, getting rid of stuff, change in behavior. Most very depressed people don't go around announcing it. Quite the contrary, they already feel so out of place, they don't want to bring more attention to themselves­.
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Esmeralda Williamson-Noble
Activist, Writer
08:56 AM on 02/28/2010
We need awareness, understand­ing, and.... no let me put it another way even oxymoron with their oxymoronic comments contribute to raising awareness. Better having people talking, albeit from their.... than not talking at all.