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Evan Shapiro

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Who Shot JR? Who Cares?

Posted: 02/ 7/2012 9:30 am

Let me make one thing clear: I really liked the remake of Battlestar Galactica. Seriously, I did. OK? Now that that's out of the way, here is this week's hypothesis:

TV Remakes Are Bad Mojo.

It's not that I think producing series that have already been made shows a lack of originality or ambition (which I do). It's not that rehashing shows from the past reduces the chances for new; unique ideas to succeed (which it does). It's not even that I intensely dislike almost all of the TV that has ever been remade (before you set your Tweet to stun, see the BSG comment above).

I claim that TV Remakes are bad juju, because I have done the research, and it is simply, conclusively, unquestionably, factually true. Skeptical? Here is a chart laying out the historical success/failure rate of TV Remakes, show by show:


2012-02-06-Eshapirografone


Notes: I have run the data two ways -- with and without Smallville. With Smallville, the data is terrible. However, unlike Lois & Clark, Smallville is not really a remake of The Adventures of Superman -- it's an extension of the Comic Book and Film franchise. Without Smallville in the calculation, the results are even more dire; 20 percent worse, in fact.

The only other valid successes on the list are Battlestar and Outer Limits. The first was so well made it eradicates all memory of the original, and is therefore an exception. The latter was both syndicated and Canadian -- therefore, irrelevant.

Lastly, this is not an analysis of adaptations of TV series from other countries. The history of foreign transfers -- from All In The Family to The Office -- is significantly more storied and successful. No, this analysis and critique is limited to recycled series and ideas.

With OR without successful exceptions, the data is crystal clear. STATISTICALLY SPEAKING, TV REMAKES FAIL. This has nothing to do with artistic merit, critical acclaim, audience reaction or personal taste. Audiences reject them, and then they get cancelled -- assuming they even make it to air. The success-to-failure-ratio of TV reboots is so obviously abysmal, one can only wonder: How do they keep getting green-lit? Is this the first time this analysis has been done? (It isn't. Even on HuffPost.)

Knight Rider crashed. Charlie's Angels fell to earth. Wonder Woman... wasn't. You'd think as an industry we would get the message. (Ok, Hawaii Five-O is making it so far. But isn't that really just NCIS with a great theme song?) Yet, at this moment, there are no fewer than four major remakes planned for the 2012-2013 season.

On more than one occasion, I've used this space to show that we are in a golden era of television. From drama to comedy to animation and (yes) even reality, there is more good stuff on TV now, than at any point in its history. Beyond that, there are also hundreds of scripts and pilots that never make it to air -- NEW ideas, from new voices, with new perspectives, that die in development.

Despite ALL that, someone, somehow still decided to remake The Munsters. Seriously. The Munsters. This is happening.

Look, Brian Fuller (re-creator of The Munsters) is enormously talented. I was a big fan of his last show, Pushing Daisies -- it was a smart, funny, innovative series that should have run much longer (and on cable, might have). I am sure Fuller will endeavor to make The Munsters as interesting as possible (you have no idea how hard it was to type that sentence). In fact, to show just how fresh and edgy it will be, he's renamed it -- now it's called Mockingbird Lane! (If you pitched this as a plot for Entourage, I'm pretty sure you'd be told it was too far-fetched).

Am I crazy? Does this not scream "BAD IDEA, GO BACK!"?! If you want the show to be so different from the original, why remake it? Are there no original scripts to produce? No NEW characters to develop? DOES TELEVISION REALLY NEED EVEN MORE VAMPIRES? Oh, and by the way, look at the chart!

As previously mentioned, I see Battlestar as an exception. Earlier this season, we even paid homage to Ronald Moore and Commander Adama on a very special episode of Portlandia (One Moore Episode). But one remarkable outlier does not mitigate the fact that the millions of dollars spent recreating old series, diverts resources from new shows that -- even in failure -- are additive to the medium (see: Pushing Daisies). Reheated leftovers send a message that our industry is out of ideas. Worst of all, it flies in the face of substantial, overwhelming and irrefutable data. By a factor of 6 to 1, remakes do not work.

TV is taking more chances than ever. It attracts the best and brightest talent, it takes the greatest creative risks and it is the only popular medium consistently increasing audiences year after year. Not only are smart, complex series like Homeland, Louie, Breaking Bad and Downton Abbey getting on TV, they're finding sizable audiences. Why, then, does the industry feel compelled to play it safe -- dusting off old titles and recycling old ideas? More confusing, why do we think this IS safe, when all available evidence says otherwise?

After a movie remake JUST failed, how do you explain the upcoming remake of Bewitched? "Here's the pitch: Samantha Stevens IS Hermione Granger!"

So, why do I care? First, I needed a subject for this week's piece, and The Munster's announcement got me all wound up. Second, I have a real fear that the creative sloth that gave us Andy Dick in Get Smart; Robert Urich in Love Boat; and now promises us The Munsters without Fred Gwynn puts the industry's success at risk (Am I overreacting? For a cautionary tale, see the Domestic Movie Box Office). In a cluttered landscape of nearly limitless entertainment choices, the only way to keep viewers coming back is to continue taking risks and advancing the art-form.

Conventional Wisdom says that remakes come with "built in brand awareness" and "ready-made goodwill"; it will tempt you with "proven success" and "well established characters." Please, don't take the bait. THE DATA SPEAKS FOR ITSELF: THOSE WHO IGNORE THE HISTORY ARE DOOMED TO REPEATS.

Bonus: During my research, I unearthed even more information on potential future remakes (future remake is literally an oxymoron). Below is a chart containing six elevator pitches for new TV Reboots (new reboot: another oxymoron). Look for them soon on a TV near you.

2012-02-07-Screenshot20120207at10.04.40AM.png
 

Follow Evan Shapiro on Twitter: www.twitter.com/eshap

 
 
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09:53 PM on 02/11/2012
Uh, STAR TREK?
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drunkarate
12:53 PM on 02/08/2012
This trend won't stop until MBA's are out of the decision making loop on what gets green lit. You want original, unique, compelling, challenging, original, well-made television? You need decision-makers who care about original, unique, compelling, challenging, original well-made television instead of quarterly returns and a CYA attitude towards their jobs. It's really that simple. So long as corporations own and run movie studios getting mainstream distribution, mediocrity will reign.
12:13 PM on 02/08/2012
In general I agree with most of Mr. Shapiro's points here. However, there are a few caveats. In some cases, the original shows weren't that great to begin with, even though they may have been popular. Wonder Woman? The Love Boat? 90210? Never thought much of any of them. The original Battlestar Galactica was a silly cartoon with live actors. I certainly agree that "The Outer Limits" and "The Twilight Zone" should never have been remade.

Shapiro doesn't mention the plethora of copycat reality TV series such as "Real Wives of (insert town here)," which truly do scrape the bottom of the barrel (these aren't remakes per se, but they are retreads of other reality shows, regardless of subject matter). Once-respected networks such as Discovery and History have been taken over by shows about motorcycles, gold mining, pawn shops, truck driving, and environmental exploitation. Then there are the various cop and doctor shows. The lastest twist on these is the central character has some kind of "special power," such as a photographic memory, or they see dead people. It's true that most of these are not remakes of shows from past decades, but just about all are bad television.

Some things never change. A "new idea" appears, the other networks copy it, and the next thing you know the entire television landscape is full of pretty much exactly the same junk. Thank goodness for PBS, which is just about the only network producing programs made for an intelligent audience.
12:07 PM on 02/08/2012
This article is so funny. The writer has a great way of combining facts and his humorous opinion without making it all about himself and his thoughts on the subject. I loved it.
11:35 AM on 02/08/2012
How does the failure rate of the remakes listed above compare to the overall failure rate for scripted TV shows in general? If Wonder Woman is included based on the pilot episode that didn't go to series,it begs the question of how many shows overall never got past the pilot stage and therefore should also be considered failures.

Also, the methodology here is a little shaky in terms of what was and wasn't included. For instance, it compares the original Twilight Zone and the 2002 edition but not the 1985 CBS version. Also, while it acknowledges that the inclusion of Smallville is a little dubious, I'd say that applies to any comic-book based series since those characters/concepts were originated (and remain an ongoing concern) in another medium. I know that's technically true of the Odd Couple as well, but it's fair to say that the popular memory of The Odd Couple stems a TV show rather than the play (or even the movie), whereas there were hundreds of comic-book stories and radio shows that preceded 1951's The Adventures of Superman and thousands more since.
05:39 PM on 02/09/2012
Over the last 5 years, about 30% of new network shows got a 2nd season. 7 of his 22 (excluding Wonder Woman) listed shows got a 2nd season. That is 32%, right in line with the average.
11:43 AM on 02/11/2012
WONDER WOMAN shouldn't even be in the mix. It's nothing more than an unaired pilot. If you want to factor in unsold pilots of remakes, then you might have an argument but when you also factor in just how many original pilots go unsold every season, the percentage of those that are remakes goes back to being pretty low.
05:54 PM on 02/09/2012
Actually, more of those shows got a 2nd season than I had thought. 11 out of 22, so 50%. That is well above the average. So, apparently remakes are the way to go.

When I read this article I was hoping to find conclusive evidence that Hollywood should avoid most remakes. Sadly, that evidence is not here.
George Picard
Send lawyers, guns and money
09:42 AM on 02/08/2012
In defense of Battlestar Galactica, the 2nd time was way better then the 1st.
It was darker better acting, better storys.

The 1st was a cartoon like show for kids.

Plus the 2nd coming of Boomer was way hotter.
09:28 AM on 02/08/2012
I really enjoyed this article. I'm still thinking about it since yesterday (my life is very dull). To add to my list, I know Russell T. Davies totally stole Captain Jack Harkness and Gwen from Firefly's Captain Mal and Zoey. And, I'm still mad almost 10 years later that Firefly was cancelled. Very limited view at the networks.
11:49 AM on 02/11/2012
I liked FIREFLY as much as anyone but seriously, people, get over it. Look on the bright side: it never had a chance to jump the shark, which puts it into an elite group of series that, which cancelled too soon, never reached the point of self-parody.
And Russel T. Davies did NOT steal characters from FIREFLY, Joss Whedon is not the fountain from which all good entertainment ideas spring.
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TraceyES
08:54 AM on 02/08/2012
The point of remakes: to be able to hire a mediocre and cheap screen writer to put together a script, so the studios don't have to pay any real writers or idea people. The goal is to make maximum cash for the studio without having to pay any money out for pesky "creativity" stuff.

Network television is dying a slow, painful death, and it deserves to. I can use Netflix or Amazon Prime to watch superior British television. Why would I ever consider paying for the garbage on U.S. network television?
05:02 AM on 02/08/2012
Louie is a great show. don't care for any of the others though
05:36 PM on 02/08/2012
Let me guess...you're a "Basic Cabler"........the really good stuff is on PAY cable.... and PBS Sunday nights....
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cintirich
The posts above and below mine are wrong.
11:04 PM on 02/07/2012
It's not just remakes (although most are awful).

Pretty much everything on TV is terrible.
10:58 PM on 02/07/2012
The other issue is if you're going to remake a show or movie, why keep the original name? Chances are that the target audience (almost always the under thirties) have no connection with the original to use the name and the over thirties have high expectations which are often left unfulfilled. Like...90210.
10:12 PM on 02/07/2012
Not only are smart, complex series like Homeland, Louie, Breaking Bad and Downton Abbey getting on TV, they're finding sizable audiences
------------------------------
All above are AWEsome / MUST WATCH shows....(ditto Mad Men...Suits...Justified...Damages...Boardwalk Empire, Sherlock, Luther, Case Histories, Californication and #1 show of 2011----- BOSS !!! )........but ALL are either PAY CABLE or AMC....FX..PBS...BBCA....USA..... The lame networks are dumbing down America...with their no attention span required/ halfwit garbage !!! Only Person of Interest has an outside shot at this list !
12:31 PM on 02/08/2012
My first response to Shapiro's article was definitely negative, but your statement here hits the nail right on the head. There is very good programming on television-you just have to search through the stench of all the bad stuff to find it. "The Walking Dead" and "Hell on Wheels" are among the best shows I've ever seen. The last episode of "Dead" was so intense I was glad for the series hiatus! Unfortunately, the garbage seems to multiply like a virulent virus, while the really good programs are few and far between.
09:46 PM on 02/08/2012
Agreed - Nurse Jackie and Sons of Anarchy are also great programs with an excellent cast
09:26 PM on 02/07/2012
Do people still watch TV?
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millebocca
veni, vidi, clicki
08:38 PM on 02/07/2012
downton abbey
love love love it
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Diana Scrimger
08:27 PM on 02/07/2012
We enjoy most of the old shows more than the new ones. We are tried of having everything on TV having to be Gay friendly. We liked it better when TV was clean and enjoyable. These shows about gays are actually boring to the straights. We do not have to watch any of the shows that want to cater to the gays. We do not find them entertaining.
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TraceyES
08:55 AM on 02/08/2012
Who is this "we" you are talking about?

"These shows about gays are actually boring to the straights." Speak for yourself, we're not all bigoted homophobes.
12:41 PM on 02/08/2012
Your post appears to infer that "gay" themed shows are dirty and not enjoyable. Whether or not a television show is good has nothing to do with that. Bad TV is bad TV, and good TV is good TV. No doubt there are others who long for the "good old days" when television was entirely white, and wasn't "soiled" with actors such as Sherman Hemsley and Cheech Marin.