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Evan Wolfson

Evan Wolfson

Posted: June 2, 2010 06:35 AM

In Love and War, Honoring the Commitment of Gay Americans

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Last week, Congress took a historic step toward undoing government discrimination against lesbian and gay Americans. In a resounding and bipartisan vote, the House of Representatives by 234-194 authorized repeal of military discrimination -- trivialized by its common name, "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." The Senate Armed Services Committee voted for the same measure, and hopefully, the full Senate will swiftly send the bill to the President's desk.

When asked to explain their votes, we heard again and again from lawmakers that it is wrong and un-American to single out a group for discriminatory and unequal treatment; as Speaker Nancy Pelosi put it, repealing military discrimination would "make America more American." With the long-overdue vote to authorize an end to the military's anti-gay policy, Speaker Pelosi declared, "we honor the values of our nation, and we close the door on fundamental unfairness." She is only partly right. While repealing military discrimination certainly honors the values of our nation, it is only a step toward closing the door on fundamental unfairness.

Congress mandated military discrimination in 1993 in a shameful display of prejudice and fear mongering aimed at gay and lesbian Americans. The hypocritical and cruel "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy imposed on gay people serving our country was as unfair, unreasonable, and unconstitutional then as it is now. Since 1993, Americans have come a long way in their understanding of gay people and the unfair nature of discrimination against the LGBT community. Congress has finally caught up with the American people in supporting an end to military discrimination, which, as the experience of our allies who have ended similar discrimination in their armed forces shows, serves no valid purpose. Military discrimination makes America less safe and is a stain on our commitment to equal treatment and equal respect under the law.

Unfortunately, after approving military discrimination in 1993, Congress took further steps to isolate and stigmatize lesbian and gay Americans. Three years later, in 1996, in another orchestrated campaign of scare tactics, Congress passed the so-called "Defense of Marriage Act," making marriage discrimination federal policy for the first time in American history. DOMA inserted the federal government into what was always the states' role under the Constitution to determine who may marry, and it created two classes of marriage, those the federal government respects, and those which, even when legally sanctioned, are denied every one of the more than a thousand federal protections and responsibilities afforded to married couples, including critical access to Social Security, immigration, health-coverage, and spousal tax benefits.

Military service, like marriage, has long been considered a defining element of citizenship and full participation in society. And military discrimination, like exclusion from marriage, is one of the cruelest and most unfair ways in which gay Americans endure inequality at the hands of their own government. Even the architects of these discriminatory laws have changed their minds and publicly called for their repeal. Colin Powell, a key advocate of military discrimination in 1993, now publicly opposes that policy. Likewise, President Clinton and former Republican Congressman Bob Barr, who signed and authored DOMA in 1996, now support its repeal.

The vast majority of Americans support repealing military discrimination, and once the bill is signed, the President and military leaders should move quickly to finish the job. And as soon as Congress finalizes the bill authorizing repeal, it should turn its attention to removing the equally repugnant 1996 law mandating federal discrimination in marriage and get government out of the business of discriminating against any American.

I believe that Speaker Pelosi and the majority of Americans do indeed want to "close the door" on fundamental unfairness and unequal treatment of gay and lesbian citizens by the government. Repealing military discrimination is a meaningful stride toward full and equal citizenship for all, but before we can declare the door closed on discrimination, we must stop denying committed couples, who happen to be gay, the equal right to cross the threshold.

 

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02:53 PM on 06/03/2010
What is the deal here folks. Why does the gay community insist on special treatment, and laws to be written just for them, they are not the under-privileged or victims. They have chosen a life style which violates the very laws of nature. They should be treated no differently in civilian life than any other person. However the military is not a democratic organization. The heads of the military should chose policy best suited for the military.
09:16 PM on 06/03/2010
There is no special treatment. Gays want the same rights YOU have. There is no special right being granted. I don't know where people get the idea that the GLBT community is seeking some right that no one else has.
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wayne a
10:10 PM on 06/03/2010
why should we change the definition of marriage just for gays? marriage has been defined as between a man and a woman for hundreds and hundreds of years and most people are against changing it now! so why should gays be given special treatment? just like obama making the announcement that gay's partners can have the benefits as well.almost no business will recognize a domestic partner unless they are married,again gays getting special treatment! as far as obama's reason behind this it's, votes! just like obama wanting to give amnesty to illegals and citizenship,obama is pulling out all stops to try to get re-elected. he knows right now he's in deep trouble.
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tosc
11:24 AM on 06/04/2010
what is the deal here folks....if gays choose to be gay then straights choose to be straight, which infers that gays were straight prior to their decision and straights where gay prior to their decision. the word 'decision" means there is a conscious determination to conduct oneself in a certain way. And by the way.....it is 'staight' people who are giving birth to 'gay' people. Gayness does not violate the laws of nature. There must be a reason why straight people "choose" to be gay? right? LOLOLOL.
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DuncanONeil
12:23 PM on 06/03/2010
First of all it is a policy within the military not something enshrined in law.

Second there is nothing preventing gays from serving. In fact I am positive that gays have always served honorably in the services.

Don't even try to say that they "should not have to hide", the same applies to heteros in service as well. There is an exhausting number of things that can be determined to be "prejudicial to good order and discipline". Many of the things we all take for granted in the every day world fall into that category in service. As a simple explanation, nearly everything kinky could get you in trouble. And no that is not all.
11:04 AM on 06/03/2010
Perfect and my point all along. The anti-gay marriage proponents - if the word 'marriage' is such a sticking point - wouldn't have a leg to stand on if we just changed the wording. Isn't the goal to get the same rights as heterosexual couples? If so, let's take this in steps and not focus on the word 'marriage'!
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Cosatjockomo
10:25 AM on 06/03/2010
Beat dead horses much?
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gutenmorgen
a.k.a. crowsnest
09:31 AM on 06/03/2010
I hate to spoil the party. The repeal of DADT before the repeal of USC 10-654 is actually bad for gay soldiers because DADT is not the law which governs the discharge of gay soldiers from the armed forces. USC 10-654 is that law. Let me give you examples of what will undoubtedly happen if DADT is repealed before USC 10-654. Now recruiters can legally ask a volunteer: "are you gay"? If the volunteer is gay he/she must lie to get into the armed forces. If a gay soldier mistakenly believes that he can now legally marry his/her partner that soldier will be in for a nasty surprise: most likely dishonorable discharge. If a gay soldier mistakenly believes that he can now legally and openly talk about his sexuality he will be in for the same nasty surprise.
The correct actions are therefore: 1. repeal of USC 10-654. 2. Repeal of only the don't tell part of DADT, keeping the don't ask part on the books.
I am astonished that Mr. Wolfson does not seem to understand this.
11:35 PM on 06/02/2010
It is interesting that Obama is against Gay marriage. I wonder if he would veto any legislation that allows for Gay marriage.
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MoniqueF
11:57 PM on 06/02/2010
I do not believe Obama is really against Gay marriage. I do believe it is simply political ! Too bad that politic has to play a role in Human Rights!
01:25 AM on 06/03/2010
I think you may be right about that - secretly for gay marriage but it is politically expedient to say he is not. He would not have been elected had he come out in favor of gay marriage.
11:20 PM on 06/02/2010
I'm always amazed at how Americans agonize over issues that have become old news elsewhere in the world. At least 35 countries, including mine, welcome gay and lesbian citizens into the military as a matter of course with zero effect, positive or negative. It's like declaring that left-handed people are now welcome to serve and to die for their country.

The historical isolationism of American political and social thought seems to preclude the simple act of looking at what other countries have done in any given situation (same-sex marriage, reproductive rights, all the usual hot-button issues). Why do you continually go through this divisive national soul-searching every time someone suggests that the US might benefit from joining the 21st century? Do you really believe you're the first to grapple with these issues? Traditionally, you're among the last.

Granted, the iron grip that the religious right has over your political system may require conspicuous courage on the part of some of your politicians, but otherwise, the whole world has been there, done that. Stop re-inventing the wheel, folks: it's round, and it works.
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Soulmentor
"To thine own self be true...."
12:27 AM on 06/03/2010
Scathingly eloquent. I love it. Fanned.
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Soulmentor
"To thine own self be true...."
12:31 AM on 06/03/2010
May I quote you occasionally?
12:47 AM on 06/03/2010
Thanks, and absolutely.
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josephRoehl
RainbowHumanityRising, 600 million
09:44 PM on 06/02/2010
Thanks so very much Evan Wolfson for your article. I agree wholeheartedly with all that you've written.

Let us honor the gay and lesbian soldiers who've already died and are dying in service to our nation by making sure that all Americans str8 and gay have the same rights to serve and the same rights to marry the person they love, and the same rights to live in dignity and peace and prosperity. Then we are honoring the finest traditions of the USA, when she stands tall for all human beings and thus honoring these fine men and women in memory by doing the best by all Americans as equal citizens..
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10:43 PM on 06/02/2010
I wonder if it wouldn't be a strong statement if we encouraged all Gays to serve in the armed forces.
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Soulmentor
"To thine own self be true...."
09:37 PM on 06/02/2010
Has it occurred to anyone that the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier may contain a gay man.....and that he is being accorded one of the greatest honors this nation can bestow?
If that doesn't point out the gross inconsistency and hypocrisy of anti-gay discrimination, I don't know what does.
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MoniqueF
11:59 PM on 06/02/2010
Thank you and fanned!
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wayne a
10:29 PM on 06/03/2010
soulmentor,evidently you have never served in the service,especially in combat.there is a different mindset in the service than in public and soldiers will not except openly gays serving in the military! even though alot of gays have served honorably.
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Soulmentor
"To thine own self be true...."
10:37 PM on 06/03/2010
Wrong!! I am a gay AF vet with two military officer sons, a Marine Capt and a "Coastie" Lt. both of whom think DADT is unjust and ridiculous and hypocritical, that it should be repealed but with cautionary concerns about implementation of open integration.....concerns that DO NOT include such ridiculous things and separate showers and living quarters.
I did not see combat but my Marine son is and Iraq vet.
Now stuff it.
07:02 PM on 06/02/2010
I was thinking that it may be a problem with marketing which is basically people's perception. We're trying to call it marriage, which is the sticking point for religious groups and such. Why not call the union of two people something else? Perhaps something in Latin where the name would have historical roots.

That way this 'new term' that would be developed could be granted the same rights and privileges as marriage, but not be 'limited' to be just between a man and a woman.

Civil Union was tried, and is too clinical sounding to be romantic enough to signify a meaningful relationship between two partners.

Just a thought.
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ColleenHarper
Actions always have unintended consequences
07:11 PM on 06/02/2010
It is a nice thought, but the truth is, marriage is a civil institution in every state of this nation, no mater how strongly the religious organizations and their members may protest.

In Every state of the United States, it is the state government, through county courthouses and state offices that issue marriage licenses, just as it is the state that issues drivers licenses. Therefore, it is not the church that is recognizing the validity of the marriage. It is the state that is doing so.

So those who are religiously affiliated are wrong. Marriage is not a religious institution, it is a civil institution, and to deny this right to someone based on sexual orientation is a blatantly wrong as if the state denied a drivers license to someone who is gay.

Of course, the religious are not going to be persuaded by reason. They are persuaded by faith and reject reason a priori. If you doubt this, look at the rejection of a heliocentric solar system, or the rejection of biological evolution.
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09:28 PM on 06/02/2010
You are absolutely right, and everyone needs to be clear that it is the states that issue marriage licenses, and furthermore, say who can or cannot marry. NONE, not one of the states requires any religious affiliation whatsoever to get married.
CIVIL MARRIAGE IS A CIVIL RIGHT.
11:48 PM on 06/02/2010
Society has a responsibility to recognize each individual as having value and significance. However, the issue of whether marriage is reserved for between one woman and one man needs to be looked at not as a legal right, but how the Lord our creator designed it. Marriage was ordained by God, not humans. We have made it a civil right. This was not how it was originally designed.

The arguement of discrimination against same sex marriages does not hold any water. If you argue it is about the rights to social security, health benefits and others, then the arguement is not about two people marrying for love, but for the right to stuff. A man and woman do not get married for the right to collect social security benefits or health insurance.

This issue is not about reason and discrimination, it is about what is right for society and in God's eyes. Just because two people love each other does not justify to right to marry. A daughter loves a father; a son loves a mother; a sister loves a brother, and so on. Does this justify marriager?

I know we will never agree but that is because of each of our world views. I look at the world from God's point of view and you will see it based on standards that you want to make up as you go or that feels right for you.
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Flip75
What's wrong with my micro-bio?
07:17 PM on 06/02/2010
Why pander to the religious zealots at all? If they've got a problem with the word "marriage" being applied to all equally, then let THEM call their relationships something else.
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09:34 PM on 06/02/2010
I believe we already have secular marriage and religious marriage. If two people get married at the courthouse, it is most definitely a legal marriage. It is possible to have a secular marriage without it being a religious marriage, but it is not possible to have a religious marriage recognized by the state, without it also being a secular marriage. This is another example showing that the states are in charge of legal marriage.
11:55 PM on 06/02/2010
It is about what is ordained by God. Homosexuals are humans like everyone else. The should be afforded the same respect as everyone else, but that does not justify distorting the institution of marriage as it was ordained by God.

It is not about the word "marriage" it is all about knowing what is right and wrong for society and the sanctity of the family.

At some point we will all have to answer to God. So be fearful of how you view what standard you want to live by. Your standard or a standard established and designed by our creator.

In His Name
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JBS
Part time misanthrope & full time curmudgeon
05:44 PM on 06/02/2010
I propose a simple test for evaluating arguments pro & con regarding "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and allowing homosexuals to openly serve in the military:

Take the argument and remove the words "gay, lesbian, LBGT, homosexual, ...".
Insert the word "Negro" in its place.

Does the argument still make sense? Does it square with the U.S. Constitution as amended?

If so, it's a valid argument, if not ...
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Jaya Santhan
05:21 PM on 06/02/2010
Personally i think each person should be able to designate any 1 person in their life (could be a brother, sister, father, mother, best friend, cousin etc ) to have critical access to Social Security, immigration, health-coverage, and tax benefits. On a government level, a person should not have to be defined by their sexuality.
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David Conklin
05:04 PM on 06/02/2010
Marriage is a religious institution. We have a separation of church and state for good reason--look at history when they were mixed. So, the last thing in the world you should have is the state deciding who can be married and who cannot.
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ColleenHarper
Actions always have unintended consequences
06:51 PM on 06/02/2010
So "marriage" is a religious institution? Show me how many states issue marriage licenses. (Hint: It's 50 out of 50) That makes marriage a Civil institution licensed by the state.

Now, you may wish to go to your favorite church and have a nice ceremony performed by your favorite priest or pastor or whatever, but as long as it is the state issuing the license, it is still a Civil institution.

So, since it is a civil institution, the last thing in the world you should have is the church deciding who can be married and who cannot.

Sorry, your logic was completely backwards.
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Flip75
What's wrong with my micro-bio?
06:53 PM on 06/02/2010
Fanned for saying what I wanted to, but much more nicely. :-)
11:58 PM on 06/02/2010
Your point is well placed but I would differ on some details. The states issue approvals for marriage IE: a license has to be issued before the marriage is performed. The actual marriage itself is performed either by a religious official or a state official. So it gets a little murky here. In fact states got into this business for health reasons and also to boost their revenues. Another point is marriage historically has always been between a man and a woman. There is no precedent for homosexual marriage and thus legally cannot be considered discrimination. That little fact is why no civil rights groups have taken this issue to the Supreme court and argued it as discrimination. They know that there is a large chance that they will lose. So the only avenue left open is through congressional approval to change the definition of marriage. The legalities are a bit more complicated than most people understand.
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10:03 PM on 06/02/2010
"We have a separation of church and state for good reason"

You are correct. It is so that each citizen has the same rights as the next without regard to religion.
Marriage is a CIVIL institution and a CIVIL right. Each state, as well as DC and US territories, sets its own rules for marriage. Those rules have NOTHING to do with religion. NOTHING, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. The states rightfully allow atheists and other non religious people to marry. I shudder to think what would happen if this power were given to the churches. Shudder, shudder, shudder!
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11:28 PM on 06/02/2010
Shutter, shutter, shutter! I think I'd like that.
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James Peron
04:49 PM on 06/02/2010
Certainly repealing DOMA should have been a first priority. What is shameful is how many gay rights groups have tried hard to protect Obama from criticism, putting their partisan support for the Democrats ahead of their support for equality before the law.

And, this new measure, to repeal DADT is really a stalling measure that takes the heat off Obama while the status quo remains in place until the bureaucrats decide otherwise.
01:49 AM on 06/03/2010
Do you really thin a DOMA repeal should be so high on the list when we have high umemployment and very serious issues in our economy, long since before Obama entered office? Really?
04:36 PM on 06/02/2010
I totally agree, but let's not mention it before we get the DADT repealled!