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Father Alberto Cutie

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Didn't We Almost Have It All: Our Search for Happiness and Fulfillment

Posted: 02/23/2012 11:50 am

One of the most popular songs of the legendary singer Whitney Houston was "Didn't We Almost Have It All." My days as a teenage disc-jockey almost always come back to me when the words of an old song have some special meaning for life's circumstances. Days ago, when the world was shocked by the news of the untimely death of this incredibly talented woman, the first thing that came to my mind is that, unfortunately, Houston was just one in a long list of talented Americans who have died in the past several decades due to some connection with drug abuse.

Perhaps the words in the title of this incredible hit, which was in the Top 40 for 13 weeks, is part of the problem. As was the case with other incredible talents like Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley, one can say that Whitney Houston was among those who "almost had it all". Interviews of the now deceased singer show that the more money she made, and the more prestige she seemed to enjoy in her career, the more she abused drugs of all kinds.

Certainly one of the most valuable things that Houston had in this life was a great mother, who apart from being a very talented Gospel singer herself, was also a concerned parent who did so much for her daughter and insisted on admitting her into rehabilitation programs to fight an addiction that seemed to more dangerous with each passing day. Whitney Houston was truly blessed to have family members who cared for her, did not give up and fought for her to have the opportunity to overcome the "demon" of addiction. Although not successful in their battle, the truth is that like so many other families, they struggled for years to seek their loved one's healing and recovery.

Unfortunately for most of us, addiction is not limited to the rich and famous, although we seem to talk about it much more when public figures suffer from it. This is a reality we are seeing more and more in our society and it is affecting countless families, regardless of socio-economic status. We are discovering more and more that there are "addictions" of all kinds, even beyond drugs and alcohol. At times it appears as if human beings are seeking ways to "have it all," even when the result of that search can cause so much damage. The fact is that they all require attention and intervention.

Yet, apart from all we continue to learn about the illness of addiction, there is a question that remains unanswered: What is it that makes so many people among us seek a substance or any destructive addiction to satisfy their needs or find a passing sense of happiness?

This is where the title of Houston's song comes to mind yet again. I believe part of the problem lies in discovering what it means to really HAVE IT ALL. No matter what level of fame or prestige we may or may not achieve in this life, if we look around we may discover that in so many ways we already have it all. If we pause for a few moments and look at our own lives, we will find countless expressions of love, peace and joy. Things such as the ability to get up in the morning and take a deep breath, seeing the sun shine and the possibility of enjoying those simple things of life are all too good to take for granted. Can we take it a step further and allow ourselves to come to the conclusion that material things simply do not meet or satisfy our deepest longings? The vacuum in every human being is ultimately a spiritual one, which, as a wise monk once said, has the exact size of God and only God can fill it.

Actually, if we really open our minds and hearts, we may discover that we already "almost have it all."

 
 
 

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02:50 PM on 02/26/2012
The impulse to self-destruct exists in us all, but some like Whitney Houston are more sensitive and susceptible to it than others. Unfortunately, the impulse does not dissipate or go away with age; however, it can be transcended at any time. You must willingly make the choice for life, which is also the choice for God. Only you can save yourself because only you can make the choice for life. Karen Bentley, author of The Power to Stop.
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suenet77
12:37 PM on 02/25/2012
Addiction is a disease just as diabetes or heart disease . . .it is physical, mental and spiritual . . it is the only disease, however, which tells you you don't have a disease . . .80+ % of alcoholics and addicts have what is known as co-occurring disorders . . . meaning that they also have some type of
mood disorder along with the addiction going on concurrently . . .such as low-grade depression, clinical depression, manic depression, or sometimes a personality disorder (more rare) . . . often the substance abuse begins as an attempt to medicate these co-occurring disorders and then becomes exacerbated by the physical aspects of the disease . . .the fact that the body cannot process the sugar in the same way as a normal person . . . .setting up a craving and the desire for more . . .
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Marcus01
It all just seems like it's real
08:22 AM on 02/25/2012
There are drugs, and there are drugs. DMT, dubbed 'the spirit molecule', is not alcohol. Cannabis is not crack cocaine. I submit that whether they're aware of it or not, many drug users are seeking a spiritual experience - something difficult to find elsewhere in the shallow, materialistic culture we have today.
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sweetlilthing
hurt no one but tell the truth
11:18 AM on 02/24/2012
My brother had a serious back operation. He had a gifted Dr. who staff spent zero time explaining the dangers of addiction or what to do about break through pain. Armed with a bottle of highly addictive pills he had no idea that he was going to use all of the pills in a short time and be in desperate need of more pills. Luckily he came to us and that's when we got back to the Dr with our concerns about the lack of information and lack of pain relief. My brother took too many pills because of the pain and 3 times he had to wean himself off of them, which was a horrible experience while having pain. Thank goodness we understood what could happen if he continued to use his pills improperly. Doctors need to do more than send people home with a bottle of highly addictive pills. Thank goodness we understood where this could lead him.
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sweetlilthing
hurt no one but tell the truth
10:42 AM on 02/24/2012
" The vacuum in every human being is ultimately a spiritual one, which, as a wise monk once said, has the exact size of God and only God can fill it."

Many people who are drug addicts have God in their lives. I've got to guess they and their families pray daily for help, yet so many just can't rise above their addictions. Even AA programs that tell you to give it up to God have a miserable failure rate.Since so many drug addicts are not wealthy how can wealth or being a materialist play a part in their addiction?
To insinutate that drug addicts have a hole or vacuum in their spirits and that's the reason they can't overcome drug addiction is wrong, insulting to families members and gives addicts false hope that God will cure them. I say drug addicts come from every walk of life and have nothing to do with how much they love or don't love God.
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Tylerious
My mom thinks I'm awesome
10:18 AM on 02/24/2012
What about addiction to religion?
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Dr Idris
polymathy is not understanding
10:10 AM on 02/24/2012
As a "disciple" of Charlie Parker, an American genius, who suffered a similar fate, it is refreshing to read someone who asks the right questions and addresses the real issues.
05:18 AM on 02/24/2012
Our help is in the name of the Lord, who made heaven and earth - Psalm 124:8

I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me - Phillipians 4:13

- www.deathandlife.org/addictions.html
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Capricious Capricorn
Don't wait for a storm to pass. Dance in the rain!
06:51 PM on 02/23/2012
People who have attained fame and fortune must feel a great deal of pressure. To reach the top of the mountain means there is nowhere else to go but down. So the pressure is to stay on top. It's self inflicted pressure and those with addictive personalities will use whatever they can afford. For some it's illegal and/or prescription drugs and for celebrities there are enough greedy doctors who will accomodate their 'needs'. There are average people who pressure themselves as well. Some choose nicotine, alcohol, food. It's not just 'illegal' or prescription drugs. It's apparent in our society food has become addictive for many. This is my observation. People in all walks of life have pressure of one kind or another and people find their own way to deal with it.
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thegodlessgeneration
better to embrace hard truth than reassuring fable
05:28 PM on 02/23/2012
There is not a vacuum in every human being. Even if there was, I'm sure it could be filled by someone/something else more useful than God. This mindset that humans are damaged or will never be complete until God is in their lives needs to stop.
05:17 PM on 02/23/2012
Perhaps people seek their worth in things...money..social standings...fame...all of which in the end mean
little to nothing if they have not found the one thing which is hardest to find..."oneself"...Things rust..and fall away...money...as it goes "can't buy you love"..social standing as fame ia a fleeting thing....Happiness
last a mere second in time..to truely have it all one must find the peace within oneself...the courage to be..
and when its all said and done the only thing which ever really mattered in life was that you loved and were loved in return....and love well love is God's gift to us to share one to the other...oh and one other thing as Dionne Warwick sang.."no night so long that you can't find the day...no day so wrong that you can't find the way..call on me (God) like you use to do..He can still show you who you are."
researcher
researcher
05:03 PM on 02/23/2012
Do we really know in her life what caused her to take to drugs?

Was it her upbringing? Did something happen to her while young that she could not deal with?

Was it her religious teachings while a child that put a fear of hell in her for some of her human desires so she turned to drugs to deal with these personal issues.

Did she feel like she was not a good enough Christian?

Did she fear there would be no after life and there was no meaning and purpose to life?

Our prisons are overflowing yet we are the most religious of all the industrialized nations. Are those two related? Religious folks want more religion but we already have the most religion of all industrialized nations yet our prisons are overflowing.

we are a special cause of variation outside of 3 sigma limits for you deming fans. :-)

We live in such a corrupt society with our capitalistic agendas we are now making corp profits of our prisons. Immoral to the core.

How do we know that more religion will in effect create more drug use?

We do know that wealth and fame can be very self-destructive. History has shown us that.
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Boxers4Me
03:25 PM on 02/23/2012
Many have left the Priesthood because they simply didn't have what it takes to be a Devout, Holy and Good Priest. Many of them were naive and/or put the skirt before their vows. I would rather take any advice from a Parish Priest who is living his vows and giving us an example to follow. Cutie simplly isn't or wasn't a good priest to take his cake and eat it too. Buy his books????Never!!!!