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Meredith Bodgas: 6 Things Not To Say To Women Who Keep Their Maiden Names

2012-02-23T18:41:10Z

This article originally appeared on MeritalBliss.com

Unlike most married ladies, especially the ones where I come from (Staten Island, NY), I didn't change my last name when I married my husband Paul. And just as being childhood sweethearts and an interfaith couple has caused confusion among traditionalists -- and even forward-thinking folks who don't realize their comments and questions can offend -- so has this. Learn from those people's mistakes and never utter these words to women still proudly sporting their maiden names.

But then you won't be connected to your children.
Anything that lives inside me for nine months, whether or not we share a last name, is pretty damn connected to me for life. This also presumes that my children will have only Paul's last name, which might not even be the case.

Then you won't be a united family.
Paul and I have this crazy plan to live in the same home as each other and our kids. We'll eat dinner together, go on vacation together, and help each other when we need it. I have plenty of friends who share a last name with their fathers, men they resent for leaving their families. I have a feeling we'll be more united than them.

That'll be confusing for your kids.
Mommies and Daddies have lots of differences. Paul grows hair on his face; I do not (usually). I have boobs (sort of); Paul does not (not yet at least). Paul's name is Paul, and my name is Meredith. So I think our children will be able to process that Paul's and my last names differ too.

See more: The Best Before-a-Baby Advice I Never Got

That's disrespectful to your husband.
So is it disrespectful that he's not taking my last name? Why isn't it disrespectful to my father if I change it? This logic is poop.

A girlfriend who wouldn't take my last name would be a deal-breaker for me.
A friend of a friend said this to me. I thought when you're truly, completely in love with someone, her name shouldn't be the reason you don't propose marriage.

Oh, you're such a career woman.
Sad, but true, this was also said to me. I'm as much a career woman as Paul is a career man, except nobody would ever call him a career man for having a job he enjoys. And while my byline, the name that's associated with every article I've ever written for magazines and websites, is partly why I kept the name Meredith Bodgas, it's not even a big part. The fact is at last count, there were fewer than a dozen people with the last name Bodgas on this planet (maybe there are more on Mars). And because so many of the people with that last name were slaughtered in the Holocaust, I'm hoping to help this name survive as long as I can, which is ironic because I have a notebook from seventh grade filled with scrawls of my first name with Paul's last name. Then again, that was before I became a "career woman."

Bottom line: Everyone has their own reasons for changing or keeping their original surnames, and to judge them for or make assumptions about a choice that has no bearing on your day-to-day is pretty pointless.

What's the most obnoxious remark you've heard someone make about a married woman who didn't change her last name? Why did you keep or change your last name?

Follow Meredith on Twitter @mereditor.

Danielle Elder: How Much Should You Tip Your Vendors?

2012-02-23T14:52:44Z

The other night I was in a meeting room sitting across from clients of mine, a truly lovely couple who are to be married at a beautiful historical venue in a few weeks' time. About to have our final walk-through of the wedding day, we sat with the caterer (no seafood, as per the bride, due to an allergy), the florist (with whom we painstakingly deliberated over textured votive candles), the venue manager and the photographer, and before I knew, it we were almost done finalizing the details of this sure-to-be-amazing event.

The meeting had gone exactly as any wedding planner would hope. We discussed all arrival times, details of welcoming their guests, ceremony music cues, processional, recessional, cocktails, dinner, toasts, dancing and so on. Everything seemed in place and all questions were answered. Â

The group started to break up and we said our goodbyes. My bride was happy with our progress and thanked me. I gave my clients a final embrace and as we grabbed our coats to walk out the door, the groom turned to me -- slightly panicked -- and said, "What about the tips, Danielle?"

Good question.

And one I get often.

With all the details, many seem to overlook the important task (and etiquette) of tipping.

Here's my no-fail, go-to guide on making those who put your wedding together as happy as the bride and groom on the Big Day.

Golden Rule: Plan your tips as you go through your wedding timeline. This will ensure you won't forget anyone!

HAIR AND MAKEUP:
Typically they are the first vendors to show up and they transform you from beautiful to stunning. TIP: 10%-20% of their fee.

TRANSPORTATION
They do more than open the door for you. TIP: Each driver should get 10%-20% of their fee.

HOUSE OF WORSHIP or OFFICIANT
Many houses of worship ask for a small donation in advance, so you may have that already squared away, but if not, $100 is the suggested tip for the man or woman who pronounces you Husband and Wife.

VENUE MANAGER
They oversee everything at your venue. TIP: $100-$200.

CEREMONY MUSICIANS
Show some applause! TIP: $25-50 per musician.

BAND MUSICIANS
Same here. The bandleader should get a tip anywhere from $150-$200 and then a suggested tip of $25-50 for each musician.

DJ
Hired a DJ instead to keep your guests moving all night long? TIP: 15%-20% of their fee.

WAITSTAFF
Most likely you are paying a service charge for the waiters to serve your guests that night (take a peek at your contract), but a little extra is always appreciated. This is the same as if you were sitting at your favorite restaurant. TIP: 15%-20% for the team to divide among themselves.

Same goes for the BARTENDERS who keep the good times rolling. And they will! Suggested TIP for them: $200-$300 each.

CHEF
The chef is responsible for everything that your guests see and eat. If it is beyond what you expected, a tip is a good idea. Anything from $150-$250.

MAITRE D/CAPTAIN/CATERING MANAGER
This person handles all the operations of the venue. TIP: 1%-2% of your total bill.

ANY ASSISTANT
Has the DJ brought an assistant? Has the photographer or videographer brought an assistant? Chances are they have and they don't go home with the same pay for the night that your contracted vendor does. You should throw them a little something. TIP $75-$100

And, of course, if you'd like, there are a few more behind-the-scenes hands...

BATHROOM ATTENDANT
He or she smiles, maybe hands a towel to guests and makes them feel a little bit more special for the night. TIP: $1 per guest.

COAT CHECK and VALET PARKING
No one wants to wait for their coat or their car when they are ready to go home! TIP: $1-$2 per guest for coat check, TIP: $2-$5 per guest for the valet.

That's it!

Remember these folks helped you with the biggest and best party you will ever throw. Show them you appreciate it!

Anne Naylor: How To Have An Atheist Wedding Ceremony

2012-02-23T14:26:10Z

Does the word "atheist" sound cold to you? If you enjoy the comfort, reassurance and community that comes with a religion or spiritual practice, you might find the idea of an atheist ceremony a bit sad and non-celebratory.

The British Humanist Association defines atheist this way:

"Atheist includes those who reject a belief in the existence of God or gods and those who simply choose to live without God or gods. Along with this will usually go disbelief in the soul, an afterlife, and all other religious beliefs."

What does it take for your wedding to be meaningful and memorable? How can your ceremony be a special occasion that you will remember all of your lives and that sets the foundation for a long and happy marriage? Is a spiritual or religious context the only valid way to celebrate your union?

As a celebrant in the South of France, I often conduct ceremonies for couples, coming from many different countries, who are of mixed faith or mixed culture. They are rarely traditional and may include a religious element, or none at all. Are these weddings less meaningful?

Where there is an absence of formal doctrine, the couple has to think for themselves more than they might otherwise do. In this way, an "atheist" wedding may be more to the point and memorable because they have to invest more of themselves in preparing for it. The absence of a formal process and traditional wording can leave space for a more spontaneous and heartfelt expression of love.

Wedding planner Lucy Till offers these words of advice:

"Be sure to include music, readings and poems. Without these, the ceremony is very short and I feel does not give enough gravitas to the occasion. Your guests have all arrived, everyone has been busy getting ready, photos have been taken, etc. It is a time for everyone, the bride and groom, but also your families and friends to reflect on your commitment to each other. In a religious ceremony there is plenty of time for this with the hymns, the prayers, the readings and the sermon. It is important to allow time for this reflection in an atheist ceremony."

I prefer to view an "atheist ceremony" as a "celebration of love." The experience of love transcends all the boundaries and differences, beliefs and conditions, and touches all who join the couple in their celebrations.

Many years ago, I conducted a wedding for a groom whose Muslim family was originally Palestinian, now living in another part of the Middle East, and a bride whose family was English Protestant. The ceremony text had to be spiritually "neutral," favoring neither faith. It was a very lively and exuberant occasion. Applause came from the Palestinians at the end of each section. After the exchange of vows, the Palestinian parents rushed over to the bride's mother to embrace her warmly.

How can you create a Celebration of Love that will heighten the experience of your wedding day, strengthen the bond between you and your special loved one, be touching and awaken more love in you and your guests? These seven keys may serve to create the wedding of your dreams.

1. Your values. What are the values you share with your loved one? What criteria are most important for you both to be happy and fulfilled in your lives together? These details contribute to the success of your ongoing partnership. Your values, close to your hearts, can be woven into your ceremony text.

2. Vision or aspirations for your marriage. Each person is different. So each couple is unique. It is up to you to decide how you envisage your marriage as being rich and rewarding. The readings you choose as part of your ceremony, for example, can reflect the aspirations you hold.

3. Intention for the wedding. If your wedding ceremony could be the most exceptional and enjoyable experience for you and your guests, what would that be like? How will you and everyone feel? What is the ambience you would like to create? What style will characterize your event? When you take a little time in advance to reflect on these questions, there is a good chance that what you envisage will come about, as it usually does for the couples whose weddings I officiate.

4. Declarations of love. Expressed at an early part of your ceremony, they open the way for a greater feeling and sense of connection between you and the loved ones who are there as your guests. Lighthearted and even humourous, your declarations can demonstrate the ease you have with each other and enable your guests to appreciate more why you are choosing to take this step of marriage.

Writing declarations of love can start with answering the question: What is it that you most love in your loved one? Anecdotes and insights from your times together can bring joy and laughter to the occasion. Often the Declarations are kept a secret until the day, so that the bride and groom, as well as your guests, can enjoy the surprise.

5. Vows, commitments, pledges and promises. This is a serious moment in your ceremony. Not serious in the way of being heavy and leaden, but real and meaningful for you.

You need to consider the times when life gets stressful -- moving home, changing jobs, job loss, death of a closed loved one, starting a family, for example. What are the strengths and qualities you will need to express at those testing times? Tolerance, forgiveness, sense of humor, patience, for example. Your choice of vows can assist you at those moments to remember how to deepen and expand your love, and not damage your partnership.

6. Your witnesses. Your wedding is much more than bringing the two of you together to a new level of your partnership. You are bringing two sets of families and friends into a new community, some of whom may never have met before. They are really important and need to feel valued, included as part of the occasion.

There is nothing like love to accomplish this outcome! Love brings us together. Love lets us be who we truly are. Love loosens our fears and doubts about being rejected or separate from others. Love gives us the courage to reach out to each other, share and appreciate the moment of celebration. Love allows us to let our hair down, relax and be natural. Love connects.

7. Treasure your uniqueness. In planning and preparing your ceremony, take some time to reflect on those qualities and strengths that you see in each other that maybe others do not appreciate. Give yourselves permission to shine and radiate the love that you are to each other. Doing so will allow your witnesses to catch that spirit and to see themselves in a new light. Know that the remarkable human essence that you are is a gift and more available to inspire others on your special day.

Far from cold or sad, an atheist ceremony as a Celebration of Love can truly be a service that serves all who come to it.

Pam Sweeney: Customizing Your Wedding Jewelry

2012-02-22T20:07:05Z

Last year I had the pleasure of designing a custom wedding necklace for Helen Ward, who was set to marry Wally Obermeyer, the son of skiing legend Klaus Obermeyer. The wedding was taking place in Aspen, which is not normally a formal place, it's more super style edgy, but if there was any example of "Aspen Chic," this wedding was it. Helen had been an Aspen local for years and was set to marry Wally in an intimate ceremony in front of a roaring fire followed by a bash with over 400 guests. It was the Aspen wedding of the year!

Helen had received one of my leather pearl choker necklaces as a present, and she knew she wanted to wear something on her wedding day that was really sexy and edgy, not traditional. This was not her first wedding, so she was willing to be a little more playful with her attire. Together, Helen and I designed a 100-inch-long strand of pearls. Since her dress was grey, we did grey pearls to match. In the front the necklace looked like a choker, but when she turned around, there were pearls cascading down her back, which acted as a visual veil since she did not want to wear a traditional one. After the wedding, Helen had me take the necklace apart and use the pieces to make individual necklaces for all of her girlfriends who had helped to put on the wedding. It was a way for her to say thank you in a unique way, which I thought was such a cool idea.

What should you think about when designing a custom piece? Here's my best advice:

Style. Are you wearing something old that you want to match it to or is this an entirely new piece? Are you just thinking about designing a necklace or are you going to want to do a whole set (necklace, earrings, bracelet, etc.)? Start collecting pictures of styles and designs similar to what you are thinking of or feel free to draw a sketch. It's okay if you aren't an artist. The more designing you do before meeting with the craftsman, the easier the process will be and the more likely the end result will be what you wanted.

Think about the future. Twenty years from now, will you still wear it? You want to design a piece that you will want to wear again and again, so you want it to look good forever. Stick to a classic design, but don't throw out all your personality.

Look at the whole picture. What colors will go best with your dress, skin tone, hairstyle, etc.? You might like a gold pearl, but you may look better in silver. If your dress is simple, then you have some freedom to go big with the jewelry, but you don't want to overkill. Also, don't forget that you will want to feel comfortable all night. So as great as a choker may look with your dress, if you know you'll fidget with it, go for something a little longer.

Take a step back. As women, we tend to stare at jewelry really up close, but then we can't see the big-picture stuff. Instead, look at your jewelry from far away. Take it all in and make sure it completes the picture instead of distorting it.

Don't get overwhelmed with all the choices. Pick one thing that you love (flowers that you will be holding, a bracelet, theme colors, your shoes, etc.) and design everything around this. If you love red roses, maybe you want everything else you are wearing including your jewelry to be very white. Maybe you want to wear ruby earrings to tie everything together in a very subtle way.

There are no rules ... it's your wedding. Let your personality show and stay true to what is really you.

Remember, everyone loves you at this party!

Photos by Nora Feller and Barbara Vaughn Photography

Elizabeth Smart's Wedding Details!

2012-02-22T19:34:50Z

Despite rumors of an early summer wedding, former kidnap victim Elizabeth Smart and her boyfriend of one year, Matthew Gilmour, tied the knot on Saturday in Hawaii.

The couple exchanged vows at the Laie Hawaii Temple of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a Mormon temple, on the island of Oahu. The wedding was small and intimate, with only close family and friends in attendance.

The 24-year-old bride wore an Alita Graham gown from Manhattan bridal shop Kleinfeld's, after weeks of "[trying] on just about every dress in Utah," Smart told People. The gown featured lace sleeves, a sweetheart neckline and satin-covered buttons down the back.

The groom, 22, wore a traditional Scottish kilt to honor his heritage and his father, who passed away from cancer in 2008.

After the ceremony, the wedding party moved to the islandâs luxury Turtle Bay Resort, where a lunch reception was held. That night, the couple celebrated their nuptials with an evening wedding luau at the Polynesian Cultural Center.

"They are clearly besotted with each other, and it's a wonderful thing to see," the groom's mother, Kay Gilmour, told People. The newlyweds planned to depart on an "extended honeymoon" following the wedding festivities.

Smart first met Gilmour while both were serving on religious missions in Europe. The couple dated for a year before getting engaged in January, and planned their secret destination wedding in Hawaii just two weeks before the Big Day.

The reason behind the secretive nuptials? According to Chris Thomas, a spokesman for Smart, the bride -- who was kidnapped at age 14 from her Utah home in 2002 and held for nine months -- decided that "the best way to avoid significant distraction was to change her wedding plans and to get married in an unscheduled ceremony outside of Utah."

The nuptials were a surprise to many. Smart's best friend, Katy Lund Burgess, had no idea that the couple would get married so quickly. In fact, she had to book a last-minute flight to arrive just in time for the wedding.

According to People, Smart told guests that her wedding day was one of the happiest in her life: "Matthew, I love you so much," Smart said. "I couldn't be happier. I am so grateful that everyone is here to be with and support us on this beautiful day. I love you so much."

Why 15 Weddings Aren't Enough For This Couple

2012-02-22T18:23:28Z

Newlyweds Susan and Evan Money look every bit the happy couple in their photos from their wedding day in July 1997.

But like many blushing brides, Susan wondered how long the honeymoon period would last and how she and her husband could keep the spark alive.

And as the couple headed off to act as supervisors on a school trip to France a year later, their first wedding anniversary wasnât shaping up to be the most romantic.

Is It Rude To Take Cell Phone Pics At A Friend's Wedding?

2012-02-22T18:20:28Z

This week, Farhad Manjoo and Emily Yoffe debate the question: Is it socially acceptable to take out your cell phone and snap photos of a wedding ceremony in progress, then post the shots to Facebook before the ink on the marriage certificate is dry?

WATCH: Where Did This 'Touched By An Angel' Star Meet Her Husband?

2012-02-22T17:56:08Z

Actress Roma Downey stopped by "Access Hollywood Live" on Tuesday to talk about her five-year marriage to reality TV mega-producer Mark Burnett.

Downey, who formerly starred on the long-running TV drama "Touched By An Angel," said that she first met her husband in a salon.

"He was having a haircut, and I was having a pedicure," Downey said. "Our eyes met in the mirror, you know, once, twice -- And then I thought, 'I can't look over again,' and I did."

The couple started dating in January 2004, and got engaged in November 2006 during a Thanksgiving family vacation in Mexico. They tied the knot in April 2007.

On "Access Hollywood," Downey fondly recalled her wedding, which took place on a bluff overlooking the Pacific Ocean in Malibu, Calif. Downey's former co-star, Della Reese, officiated the ceremony. "Della's my mother, you know. We adopted each other on the show. When she first met Mark, she said, 'That is my daughter and if you hurt her, I will have you killed,'" Downey said.

Burnett and Downey both have children from previous marriages; Burnett has two sons, and Downey has a daughter.

She said they have successfully blended their families together: "We fell in love, and we've been inseparable ever since. We've brought our children together, we blended a family -- it was a marriage of five people." She added, "We're a good team, and it's such a blessing."

What's Your Time-Out Signal? How to Give It a Rest During a Fight

2012-02-22T17:15:15Z

Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow isn't the only one who finds the occasional time-out hand signal helpful. Researchers say that having a pre-arranged signal is one of the most important tricks to navigating the dangerous waters of arguments with your mate. In some cases, it can be the only thing that keeps a verbal dispute from turning physical.

Truth is, every couple disagrees -- some more frequently and more venomously than others. And as an argument escalates, the barbs get sharper, the comments cause deeper wounds and it becomes more a battle of emotional maiming than a conflict you actually hope to resolve. The best thing a fighting couple can do is stop before permanent damage occurs. But how do you become the partner who waves the red flag of "enough" without it looking like the white flag of surrender?

You establish a signal between you ahead of time, and when one partner reaches the breaking point, flash it. It signifies not concession to the argument, but simply, "I need a break. We are going too far and I want us to stop before one of us gets hurt." The signal can be verbal or nonverbal. In the case of one couple, calling out "chickpea" seems to do the trick.

Katie Ramsburgh, a marriage and family therapist with The Gottman Institute, said the institute's research has shown that in relationships where the couple had developed both verbal and nonverbal cues to let the other one know they needed a break, the couples were better able to "self-soothe, slow down and stop distress-maintaining thoughts." Ramsburgh said that after a break of 20 minutes or more, these couples were able to come back to the conversation.

Some couples use a âstopâ hand signal, like a traffic cop, she said. Others use a time-out signal, like a referee. "Any pre-agreed upon signal will work," said Ramsburgh, who hastens to add that there are some "obvious" ones you wouldn't want to use. Think M.I.A. at the Super Bowl.

Does something this simple actually work?

"Yes," she said. "It works especially well if the couple has had a conversation about the cue when they are outside of the conflict conversation. Having a pre-agreed upon hand gesture or cue to let each other know that you need a break is crucial." There is an entire exercise devoted to this in the Gottman couples workshop.

The gesture serves as a repair technique. It slows down the momentum of the conflict and signals your partner that the conversation has gotten out of control. Ramsburgh adds, "It says: I am emotionally flooded. I am not able to continue this conversation right now. It does not feel safe to me. Please, letâs take a break."

Just turning your back and walking out the room, while suggesting that one person is no longer interested in continuing the conflict, won't cut it. In fact, walking out on an argument can actually escalate it.

Even a Carol Burnett-like tug on the left ear would serve the purpose. Here are some signals from the bedrooms of the Huffington Post staff to get the ball rolling:

One colleague gives his girlfriend a blank stare and raises his eyebrow. Another says they simply say the word "halt," which either has the right to do "if we're hungry, tired or drunk." And then, of course, there's "chickpea."

But our favorite technique of ringing the fight bell is literally ringing the fight bell.

Gail and Alec Wiggin of Connecticut, married for almost 25 years and in business together, resort to using a bowl bell (like this one), which she says, once rung has "absolute authority" to resolve the conflict. "The deal is this," said Gail, "no matter WHAT the situation, no matter WHAT has been said by either of us, when this signal enters the fray, each party must lay down arms immediately and unconditionally. The combat must cease -- just like that. Period. Furthermore, no matter what, apologies must follow on each side. AND no lingering resentments will be tolerated. It must be as though a giant eraser came down from the sky and just wiped out all the yuck."

What's your signal?

Australia Unearths Country's Largest Pink Diamond Ever

2012-02-22T16:00:58Z

A massive rough pink diamond has been unearthed in Rio Tinto's Argyle diamond mine in Western Australia, CNN reports.

At 12.76 carats, the remarkable find is said to be the largest stone ever discovered in the country and is expected to sell for up to $10.6 million, according to the Herald Sun.

Named the Argyle Pink Jubilee, the gem is similar in color to the 24-carat Williamson Pink given to Britain's Queen Elizabeth II as a wedding gift, explains the Telegraph.

"A diamond of this caliber is unprecedented -- it has taken 26 years of Argyle production to unearth this stone, and we may never see one like this again," Argyle Pink Diamonds Manager Josephine Johnson said in a statement.

The gem is being cut and polished into a single stone over a 10 day period and will be up for auction later in the year, Rio Tinto said.

In November 2010, Sotheby's Geneva office sold a 24.78-carat fancy intense pink diamond for more than $46 million, which set the world's auction record for any diamond and jewel at $1.86 million per carat.

More than 90 percent of the world's pink diamonds come from the Argyle mine.

Crystal Bell: 'Glee' Recap: Rachel's Wedding Leads To Shock Ending

2012-02-22T03:38:01Z

Note: Do not read on if you have not seen Season 3, Episode 14 of Fox's "Glee," entitled "On My Way."

For an episode that was supposed to be all about Regionals, "Glee" flipped a switch on its audience and, instead, turned out an episode that I don't think anyone saw coming.

Suicide attempt? Check. A potentially fatal car accident? Check. Regionals win? Who cares!

"On My Way" managed to fit several important story lines into about 42 minutes, and while I wish they would have trimmed some of the Regionals fat (I mean, does anyone really care about Regionals anymore?), I'm happy that Dave Karofsky was brought back from oblivion, bringing to light one of the more tragic realities that gay teenagers face.

In a cruel sense of poetic justice, the tormenter became the tormented as Dave Karofsky had to deal with the outcome of being seen with Kurt at Breadstix. He was bullied, emotionally and physically. His mother even told him that he could be "cured" from his "disease."

Karofsky decided that the only way to escape his pain would be to commit suicide. It's an emotionally heavy scene, and I have to applaud Max Adler for doing such an amazing job.

I was reading some of the early comments on Twitter, and I was shocked by how many people called this scene "unrealistic." They think that because he was only bullied once, it's unrealistic for him to try and kill himself.

Are you kidding me? It only takes one hurtful act to change the way people feel about themselves, and whether he was bullied for one day or one hundred days, that's not the point. The point is that he felt so alone, so hurt and so awful that he tried to kill himself -- and that is never okay.

While I applaud "Glee" for using Karofsky's story line to drive home this message, I do think that it should have had more screen time. "On My Way" felt more like a PSA. It plugged everything from The Trevor Project to Lady Gaga's Born This Way Foundation.

Honestly, I would have preferred if Karofsky's story line would have been the focus of the entire episode. Why did we have to spend 10 minutes watching everyone sing at Regionals? Why were Regionals even necessary? So that we could see how Sebastian changed his devious ways in light of Karofsky's tragedy? Or so we could see New Directions take home eternal show choir glory? To me, it all felt so unnecessary.

There was a heaviness throughout the entire episode. At one point, I truly thought that Karofsky was going to try and kill himself again, only to succeed in the end. The scene between him and Kurt was almost too perfect.

Thankfully, Kurt is the only character who didn't get caught up in Regionals hoopla. He was the only one that managed to place the importance of Karofsky's suicide attempt above winning Regionals.

The best scene in the entire episode is when Kurt visits Karofsky in the hospital. "I'm really happy that you're alive, David," says Kurt. "Yeah, me too," replies Karofsky. Dave Karofsky truly looks helpless, and it's absolutely heartbreaking.

It's also a powerful image, seeing Kurt support his former tormenter. There's a reason that Kurt has always been my favorite "Glee" character, and this scene highlights it perfectly. Kurt, unlike Rachel and Finn, has grown tremendously over the past three seasons.

Kurt tells Karofsky to imagine his life in 10 years, when he's living the life of his dreams. Karofsky imagines his life as a successful sports agent, with a handsome partner and a young son. It's a truly beautiful moment between the two.

If only that moment wouldn't have been overshadowed by "Glee" next shocking -- and heartbreaking -- drama. Remember when I said that I felt this ominous force throughout the episode? Well, I had no idea that "Glee" could go from depressing to downright bleak in a 42-minute span.

Amidst winning Regionals, suicide attempts and Sue being pregnant (yes, you read that correctly), we learn that Rachel and Finn are serious about the whole marriage thing, So serious, in fact, that they decide, in light of Karofsky almost dying, that they want to get married immediately after Regionals.

Even though their parents are strongly against it, the entire glee club comes to the court house to support them.

After having a change of heart -- and being welcomed back into the Cheerios -- Quinn decides that she too wants to be a part of the Berry-Hudson wedding. Unfortunately, Quinn never makes it to the wedding.

While answering an urgent text from Rachel (It read: WHERE ARE YOU???), Quinn gets blindsided by an oncoming car. End scene. It certainly gives a new meaning to the episode title "On My Way."

This is where "Glee" has its second PSA moment of the night: Kids, don't text and drive!

Now, I'm not going to sugarcoat this "Glee" fans, but there is a chance that Quinn Fabray might not make it. It's a shame, especially after how much they've redeemed her character in the last few episodes. But, then again, maybe that was the writers' plan all along. After all, it looks like actress Dianna Agron isn't signing on for Season 4.

This did feel like a sendoff for poor Quinn, who's been put through more drama in three seasons than Rachel's dads during a Barbra Streisand marathon.

There was this brilliant conversation between Quinn and Sue toward the end where Sue told Quinn that she admired her.

"You proved that it's never too late to turn your life around." I mean, talk about foreshadowing. Just when Quinn finally got her life together -- she's going to Yale, she made up with Rachel, she's a Cheerio again -- something happens that throws a wrench in her plans.

Maybe death is too heavy for "Glee," but then again, they did kill off Sue's sister in Season 2. However, I don't think the writers actually have the guts to kill one of their main characters. Like Sue said, I think that she'll once again have to turn her life around.

Looks like teen Jesus finally found his way on the glee club. It's only a matter of time before Mercedes and Sam recruit him in light of Quinn's accident. I can already see the God Squad (the moral compass of McKinley) praying around her beside, Ã la "Grilled Cheesus" in Season 2.

Because I don't feel like any of the other plot points are even as remotely important as the above, here are a few other "Glee" observations from "On My Way."

All Rachel really cares about is winning Regionals and getting into N.Y.A.D.A. Is this really surprising? Why is Finn even marrying her? Do they even have any concept of real life? Where are they going to live? How are they going to support themselves? Okay, I'm through acting like my Jewish grandmother. I just don't have the emotional bandwidth to care about these two. Their actions make me anxious.

We find out that Rory has never tasted peanut butter. Yes, this actually is a real plot point from tonight's episode, and it's Damian McGinty's best acting since "Pot O' Gold." Coincidently, McGinty had never had a spoonful of peanut butter until filming that episode. (Fun fact: He has yet to ever have a banana, and yes, I'm officially a Twitter stalker.)

In a true "Breakfast Club" moment, Mr. Schue reveals that he attempted suicide at a young age. Now, I would have found this to be a more poignant moment if Mr. Schue hadn't started his lesson by giving Rory a spoonful of peanut butter (and if the writers hadn't directly stolen this exact scenario from "The Breakfast Club").

Sue is pregnant.

Sebastian goes from major jerk to remorsefully nice Warbler in less than 20 minutes. It turns out that he was a total d-bag to Karofsky at Scandals -- Lima's gay bar -- and now he feels guilty.

The Troubletones make a triumphant return, and the New Directions win Regionals (duh).

Notable Quotables:
"Well, if it isn't an old Barbra Streisand and a young Betty White. Where is gay Cyclops? Still stumbling in?"
-- Sebastian

"That's show choir terrorism."
-- Rachel

"I, Sue Sylvester, am with child."
-- Sue

"In the last week, you either enjoyed a really delicious curry or received a hug from principal Figgins."
-- Sue

"I want to be there to see 'Sex and the City Part 3.'"
-- Sugar

"I just want a song."
-- Tina

"i admire you for all of the ways you're not like me. You proved that it's never too late to turn your life around."
-- Sue

"It isn't going to be easy. There are going to be days where life just sucks, but you're going to get through this."
-- Kurt

"We screwed up big time. We tried playing these reverse psychology games on them."
-- Burt

"Even Patti Lupone herself couldn't talk Rachel out of marrying Finn."
-- Hiram

WATCH: Are Brad And Angie Seriously Considering Marriage?

2012-02-21T23:11:44Z

Angelina Jolie opened up about her relationship with Brad Pitt at a special screening of her newest film, "In the Land of Blood and Honey," in Sarajevo, Bosnia on Tuesday.

Though the couple have yet to tie the knot, they are frequently rumored to be engaged or married. Pitt has previously said that the couple will not marry until gay marriage is legalized in America. When asked if the couple was any closer to tying the knot now that Proposition 8 -- which banned gay marriage in California -- has been overturned, the actress smiled and said, "Maybe."

There's been so much wedding talk that it seems to have influenced the Pitt-Jolie children as well. "They figured out what marriage is now, they're old enough so now they kind of like the idea of it," said Jolie. "But we're still convinced that half of them just want to party. They've heard there's good cake."

Pitt and Jolie have six children; three adopted and three conceived together.

Would You Agree To A 10-Year Fixed Marriage?

2012-02-21T22:24:02Z

Couples who, in a spirit of romance and hope, are beginning to prepare for a spring wedding would probably do well to avoid reading the press at the moment.

The darker side of marriage has been on display. In a law court last week, the former Mr and Mrs Huhne presented a memorable image of post-separation misery, thanks to the court artist. She sat blank-eyed at one end of the bench while he was at the other, his back turned huffily to his ex-wife. Then, over the weekend, a forthcoming book by Rachel Cusk, Aftermath: On Marriage and Separation, was serialised. Every sentence ached with unhappiness and regret.

Why Are Commuter Marriages On The Rise?

2012-02-21T22:17:28Z

Now married 13 years, the couple jokes they had to go through customs just to date. Little did they know four years ago when the economy tanked and Candice Knox got a job offer in Palm Desert, that the anniversary luggage he gave her 10 years ago would come in handy.

Raiders QB Denies Leaving Fiancee At Altar

2012-02-21T20:51:10Z

Oakland Raiders quarterback Jason Campbell was set to marry Jenny Montes over the weekend in the Dominican Republic but the wedding was unexpectedly called off at the last minute.

VIBE Vixen reported on Sunday that the 30-year-old quarterback "stood up" Montes, backing out of the wedding just hours before the ceremony.

On Tuesday, Campbell denied the report to The Washington Post, claiming the pair made a mutual decision to "put things off."

Per the Post report, the 162 guests who flew in for the occasion were told that the wedding had been called off but were not given an explanation why.

Campbell also refuted the rumors in a conversation with Kate Longworth of CSN Bay Area, telling her that it's not in his character to leave a fiancee at the alter.