Weddings on HuffingtonPost.com

Marta Segal Block: Your Wedding Is Not Unique (and That's a Good Thing)

2013-05-20T14:25:01Z

It's one of the most popular topics for a wedding blog post, "How to Have a Unique Wedding," "Five Unique Options for Your Cake (or flowers, or bridesmaids' dresses)." There are websites devoted to the idea of helping people find ideas for their "unique" and "different" weddings and then talk about how unique their wedding was after the fact.

But why all this focus on the unique? People have been getting married for thousands of years. Why do today's couples (mainly brides) feel so pressured to be unique? Most wedding planners agree that a lot of the pressure comes from our celebrity culture. We have a focus on weddings as a "wow" moment, a chance for every couple to be celebrities. Kia Martinson-Wenzel, who works for a Connecticut wedding company that rents church pews for outdoor weddings, believes that some of the pressure comes from the couples themselves. "The average bride today is older, by the time they're getting married they've been to many more weddings and want to find something different."

The Internet is also fueling the quest for originality. Sites like Pinterest thrive on brides obsessively searching for the small details that will somehow set their wedding apart from the five other weddings that year and the thousands of weddings that came before it. Because engaged couples spend so much time on wedding websites and blogs they feel like they've seen hundreds of weddings of people they don't even know. In the past, John and Sue might just have wanted to use different colors than Tim and Mary, but now John and Sue have seen every imaginable color combo online and need something else to make their wedding unique. The hard truth is though, no matter how hard you try, your wedding is not going to be unique.

Every single thing about your wedding, whether you have your rings tattooed on your fingers, or exchanged in a Celtic Handfasting ceremony, has been done before. Yes, you will serve your drinks in mason jars instead of glasses, or maybe you will try to go farther and serve your drinks in rusted tin cans instead of mason jars, but at the end of the day, you're still serving drinks to family and friends. You can use fruit or twigs or Legos as your centerpieces, but you're still seating your friends around the table and serving them food. That food may be fried chicken and biscuits served out of a trough or farm fresh vegetables sliced at the table by acrobats wielding swords, it's still food. It's still a celebratory meal.

I spent many years as the Editorial Director for GigMasters.com, a company that specializes in helping people find the perfect wedding entertainment for their individual wedding. I understand that couples want to be true to themselves. For some people who might mean that a 1980s cover band is a better wedding band and for others a traditional Wedding DJ makes more sense. But whichever you choose, you're still dancing with your spouse and your friends and family because dancing is an age-old, completely unoriginal way to show joy.

The great thing is, not being unique is ok. Weddings are a cultural tradition. Getting married makes you part of the history and tradition of your family and your community. Getting married makes you part of a tradition, and traditions are built on doing the same thing over and over again.

So, yes, absolutely, find ways within the tradition to be true to yourselves. Get married in a Quonset hut, make your dog your ring bearer, have Elvis perform your ceremony, whatever makes you feel connected to the tradition. But don't stress yourselves out trying to be unique. Don't worry if someone else has used your idea of burlap wrapped chairs, or hanging the escort cards from a tree. If it makes you happy, do it, but don't do it because it's "unique" because it isn't.

Colleen Mullaney: Recessionista Wedding Ideas

2013-05-20T13:38:18Z

Pretty Programs
Wedding plans are all about communication. Getting guests to and fro, directing them from one place to the next, and keeping them informed about activities and events can be a full-time job. Keep on top of it all by creating some clever and clear signage, programs and displays. Add a little extra touch and what starts out as a list of names can become a meaningful keepsake for you and your guests. Choose whimsical shapes and bold and beautiful colors and designs to lead the way from cocktails to dinner. Let photographs speak a thousand words and transform simple sheets of paper into cherished memories.These budget friendly ideas will impress your guests and leave your wallet happy still.

Program Fans
These sweet program fans are useful, too. They let your guests know who's in the wedding party and what will happen during the ceremony. They also provide cool relief on a hot day! These program fans are simple to assemble and custom-style with any combination of colors and paper you choose, if you don't have a planned program why not print up a love poem on the fan instead.

Storybook Program
Once upon a time a boy and a girl fell in love. The story of how you and your spouse-to-be got to this special day is a sweet subject for a wedding program. Start out with the basics, like how the two of you met, funny background quips on the wedding party, and perhaps end with a special poem or a thank you for all of the guests for being there on your special day.

Photo Program
Guests are always curious about who's who in the wedding party. The bride and groom are the stars of the show, but what about all of those fabulous supporting players? Shine the spotlight on all of those people who played a role in your special event. Include their photo, their role in the day, and a bit of trivia or funny story, sure to make your day and theirs picture perfect.

Photos by Jack Duetsch. Adapted from Handmade Weddings by Colleen Mullaney and Laura Maffeo, Creative Publishing.

Mayor To Preside Over Mass Wedding Of Same-Sex Couples

2013-05-20T12:08:49Z

Mayor Stephanie Rawlings-Blake will preside over a mass wedding of same-sex couples at this year's Baltimore Pride Celebration, with the event drawing interest from couples as far away as Atlanta, according to organizers.

In November, Maryland became one of the first states to have same-sex marriage approved by voters in a referendum.

"After doing so much work on this -- on the ballot initiative -- we thought, how do we really celebrate this?" said organizer Carrietta Hiers, who plans to marry her partner of nearly 13 years, Tonya Cook, at the ceremony.

The GLBT Community Center of Baltimore and Central Maryland is hosting the annual parade and block party in Mount Vernon and festival at Druid Hill Park -- the largest gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender gathering in the state -- on June 15 and 16. The mass wedding will take place in the park at 2:30 p.m. June 16.

Hiers, who set up the Facebook page WeDoBmore to raise interest in the event, said she has heard from about a dozen couples who want to be part of the mass wedding, and is fielding requests for more information from others. Couples must obtain a marriage license from the city clerk's office or another jurisdiction a few days before the event, per regulations.

Ryan O'Doherty, a spokesman for Rawlings-Blake, confirmed that the mayor will officiate marriages and speak at the event. Rawlings-Blake also performed marriages at City Hall for several couples just after midnight Jan. 1, when the law went into effect. Last week, Baltimore Pride organizers announced Rawlings-Blake would serve as grand marshal in recognition of her support of gay rights.

Hiers said she reached out to the mayor because of that history of support.

"She's been an advocate for us all along," Hiers said of Rawlings-Blake.

Two local ministers will also be on hand to perform marriages.

Hiers, a gay rights advocate in Baltimore, is excited for her own wedding, as well as in the interest from other couples, who will be coming from Atlanta and Philadelphia, in addition to Maryland. She believes the mass wedding to be one of the first such events of its kind.

"It's exciting, it's history," she said.

cwells@baltsun.com

twitter.com/cwellssun ___

Visit The Baltimore Sun at www.baltimoresun.com

Distributed by MCT Information Services

LOOK: RG3 Shows Off Massive Mound Of Wedding Gifts

2013-05-20T11:01:00Z

Very few Redskins fans will score an invite to the wedding of the Robert Griffin III and Rebecca Liddicoat this summer but that apparently hasn't stopped them from sending gifts.

According to RG3, his fans have already bought every item on the couple's registry with Bed, Bath & Beyond. On Sunday, the NFL's Offensive Rookie of The Year shared the photo to prove it.

Thank you to the Fans who are helping buy ALL the items from our wedding registry at Bed Bath & Beyond … say.ly/MLw5Rbg
— Robert Griffin III (@RGIII) May 19, 2013

The next several tweets in Griffin's timeline after he shared this photo suggest that the reaction wasn't all positive to the mountainous quantity of bath towels, cookware and flagrant candles that he had received. As he tends to do, RG3 fired back at those critics.

I didn't ask the fans to buy me anything. They found it on their own and decided to get what they could. SMH at all these Debbie downers
— Robert Griffin III (@RGIII) May 19, 2013

Because you are rich you are not allowed to receive gifts and any gifts you receive should be donated to charity???? #WOW Smh...
— Robert Griffin III (@RGIII) May 20, 2013

Haters gon hate. Theme of the day. They always say more money more problems. Or mo' money mo' problems. Yea I'm cultured #DealWithIt
— Robert Griffin III (@RGIII) May 20, 2013

After being selected as the No. 2 selection in the 2012 NFL Draft, Griffin inked a four-year, guaranteed deal worth $21.1 million with the Redskins. Does this mean that he should be prohibited from receiving a mixer or set of picture frames on the occasion of his wedding?

Meredith Bodgas: 10 Things That the Best Wedding Ceremonies Have in Common

2013-05-19T20:49:11Z

Article originally appeared on MeritalBliss.com.

I was fortunate enough to go to a fabulous wedding the other day (congrats, Lauren and Jon!), and even though the music was pumping, the setting was top-notch, and the food was flawless, it's their ceremony's that stuck with me. I realized as different as it was from every other of the 22 I've attended (yes, I counted), the most enjoyable ceremonies shared some key characteristics.

They're personal.
Writing your own vows is one way to accomplish this, of course, but it's not the only way. The officiant can share your "how you met" or "got engaged" story, which everyone loves hearing even if they know it. Or even something about your relationship, say, that you bonded over kung fu movies.

They're inclusive.
If you're having a religious wedding and not everyone in attendance shares your faith, a little explanation goes a long way in making your guests feel welcome. Listing events in the order they'll occur in a ceremony program isn't quite enough when those words are meaningless to the uninitiated-homily and sheva brachot come to mind.

They're interactive.
Beyond the "Does anyone have any objections?" question. At my friend Abby's wedding, a crucial part of the ceremony was inviting guests to share their wishes for the couple. It was touching.

They put their marriage in context.
I get goosebumps when officiants recognize that the marriages they're performing are the result of other successful unions that came before them. Yes, the bride and the groom are the stars of the day, but admitting that, hey, we're not the only ones who've ever done this shows humility and endears witnesses to you.

They're gracious.
Attending a wedding isn't easy or cheap. Dedicating a few moments to acknowledging those that have schlepped to be there to watch you get hitched is probably more appreciated than a trinket at their reception place setting. And the more specific, the better. At my friend Lauren's ceremony, the officiant welcomed guests who had traveled from "foreign lands like England, Japan, and Portland, Oregon," which got a big chuckle from guests who've been to Portland -- or at least watch Portlandia.

Guests are physically comfortable.
No witness wants to sweat or shiver as you exchange vows. A/C when it's hot and heat or cozy wraps when it's cold are a nice touch. Chairs for a ceremony longer than 20 minutes are fairly essential.

Well-rehearsed musicians play appropriate music.
A tune that feels out of place in the setting can ruin the mood, but melodies that naturally fit the venue enhance it. Same goes for the performers: The unskilled or ill-practiced can shake guests out of the happy place in which you want them to be. But talented folks who are familiar with the pieces are a delight.

They're easy to hear.
Listening to proceedings you can't quite make out is equivalent to waiting in a room to be selected for jury duty.

They're easy to see.
You spend hundreds, if not thousands, on your look. Your bridal party's in their finery, too. What good is it if you're obstructed by trees or your guests can't see past the heads in front of them?

They feature an obviously happy couple.
Even if you're nervous, smile anyway. Think about how lucky you are to be marrying your soul mate. Looking scared makes people wonder if you're confident about your decision -- and makes them second-guess why they came out to support you in the first place. But grins are contagious when the bride and groom are wearing them. Because at the end of the day, there's no better sight than witnessing two people in love commit themselves to each other forever.

Anything you'd add to this list? Did your ceremony have all these (sadly, mine didn't!)?

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The 10 Best Songs To Play At Your Black Tie Wedding

2013-05-19T17:53:53Z

This article originally appeared on Martha Stewart Weddings.

Once you attach "black tie" to your Big Day, it changes things a bit. Suits get fancier. Dresses get dressier. But a formal affair is no reason to spin stuffy music, so we've picked 10 tunes that go along with a black tie evening, from cocktail hour to the last dance.

1. "I Get a Kick Out You" - Frank Sinatra
No matter your feelings on jazz, you've gotta have Frank playing at some point. This upbeat pick is a little less predictable than "The Way You Look Tonight," but let's be honest, you can't go wrong with anything sung by Old Blue Eyes.

2. "Your Easy Lovin' Ain't Pleasin' Nothing" - Mayer Hawthorne
The feel-good horns and lively melody on this throwback make it a no-brainer soundtrack to cake-cutting.

3. "L-O-V-E" - Natalie Cole
Sure, you may have sung this one in grade school as you were learning to spell, but that doesn't mean it won't have toes tapping during cocktail hour.

4. "Suit & Tie (feat Jay-Z)" - Justin Timberlake
Sometimes a song choice just writes itself. JT's latest offering is fun, funky, and infectious on the dance floor.

5. "Not Even The King" - Alicia Keys
This "we're-rich-in-love" ballad makes a sweet first dance song, and its piano backdrop and simple-and-sweet vocals are begging to be played at a sophisticated soiree.

6. "You're All I Need To Get By" - Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell
One of the best duets of all time. Period. The verses start out at a simmer and build into a chorus that'll have your guests happily singing along.

7. "Fever" - Beyonce
Peggy Lee made this diddy famous in the '50s, and in this sultry version, Queen Bey coos along to its signature snaps.

8. "They Can't Take That Away From Me" - Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald
It's impossible to ignore Ella in this category, and on this track, she and Louis Armstrong list off reasons for loving each other. Awww...

9. "It's Only A Paper Moon" - Nat King Cole
This jazz standard is a cocktail hour must that -- warning! -- might prematurely start a dance session before the floor opens officially.

10. "Fancy" - Drake, T.I., Swizz Beatz
Save this hip-hop anthem for later in the evening -- once grandma has turned in for the night -- because, really, who among us, after a few glasses of bubbly at a formal event, can resist a chorus that cheekily asks, "You fancy, huh?"

More from Martha Stewart Weddings:

How to Pose for Wedding Photos

Dos and Don'ts of Wedding Registries

Real Weddings We Can't Stop Gushing Over

The Most Unique (and Beautiful) Cakes Ever

Click through the slideshow below for great first dance songs.

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Weddings on Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest.

WATCH: Uh Oh, Jen Is Still Mad At Ben

2013-05-19T16:46:33Z

Ben Affleck got an earful from his wife Jennifer Garner during his "Saturday Night Live" monologue this week. Unfortunately for Ben, she hasn't forgotten his infamous comments when accepting his Academy Award for Best Picture, when he said he was "working on his marriage" with his wife.

Garner made a surprise appearance on "SNL" to help clear the air about Affleck's speech. "It's a way that we talk privately when we talk about our marriage," she said. "Not sure why you had to share it live to a billion people..." she playfully added, then bantered about what "work" in a marriage really means to two high-power Hollywood celebrities.

Check out the clip above to see the couple joke about the comments.

Mike Hogan: The Wedding From Hell

2013-05-19T15:50:51Z

Note: Do not read on if you have not yet seen Season 3, Episode 8 of HBO's "Game of Thrones," titled "Second Sons."

"Game of Thrones" can be a relentlessly dark show, one where evil always seems to find a way to eke out a victory over good. Though this episode certainly served up plenty of doom and gloom, it also gave the optimists among us new reason to hope, as Tyrion, Sam and even Ser Davos notched some unlikely victories over the generally ascendant forces of destruction.

The opening interlude between Arya and the Hound set the tone. Arya, who never met an enemy she didn't want to kill, is ready to crush the Hound's head with a rock -- but she loses her nerve when he dares her to do it, warning that he'll break both her hands if the blow proves less than fatal. So it's back on his horse she goes. Only instead of King's Landing, they're off to the Twins, where Edmure Tully is about to wed Walder Frey's daughter -- and where the Hound plans to ransom Arya to Robb and Catelyn. "Quit trying to bash my skull in and we might just make it there in time for the wedding," he tells her, after sharing the charming tale of how he saved Sansa from a gang of murderous rapists.

Maybe the Hound is right: It could be a lot worse for Arya. We'll find out if she decides to see it that way.

Next we meet the so-called Second Sons -- after whom this episode is named. Mero of Braavos is exactly the kind of vulgar, misogynistic creep that Daenerys lives to punish, and it's fairly obvious from the outset that he's not going to make it out of this episode alive. More promising is Daario Naharis, who's handsome in that cover-of-a-romance-novel way Khaleesi seems to like. (Khal Drogo, anyone?) Emilia Clarke plays the tent scene gorgeously -- gamely laughing along with the repulsive Mero and then, once he leaves, instructing Ser Barristan to "kill that one first." I'm guessing every woman alive can relate.

Later, we learn that Daario believes the gods have blessed men with two great pleasures: "The thrill of fucking a woman who wants to be fucked and the thrill of killing a man who wants to kill you." I guess that's a long way of saying that he's not a whoring low-life like Mero, but the philosophy also fits reasonably well with Dany's anti-slavery thing. The scene where he interrupts her evening bath felt a bit contrived -- if he had already killed the other "Sons" and opted to serve the Mother of Dragons, why bother sneaking around and putting a knife to Missandei's throat? And yet, there was something grand and impressive about the way Dany climbed out of that (weirdly small) tub to face him, unabashedly naked. Clearly, she's attracted to him, and he to her, but the crucial point is that the Khaleesi blushes before no man.

So yes, what had been shaping up to be a very unpleasant battle turned into another cake walk for Daenerys, thanks to Daario's simple strategy of doing what he wants, whenever he wants. I do wonder, though, what will happen when Khaleesi gives him an order he doesn't like. And something tells me Jorah Mormont isn't going to like this dude one bit.

I was worried that Stannis would be jealous of Gendry, but then it seems I had misinterpreted Melisandre's plans for the boy. I thought she was going to make him impregnate her so she could produce another one of those murderous smoke monsters, but apparently, she just wants his blood.

I have never liked Stannis. If you ask me, he's a self-important prig who pursues his own gratification and aggrandizement under the guise of destiny and religion. So I was pleasantly surprised to see him free Ser Davos and even take his advice on the topic of Gendry. Sure, it's only Gendry's Baratheon blood that makes Stannis even remotely interested in whether he lives or dies, but we'll take what we can get with this guy. And it seems that, between them, Stannis and Davos persuaded Melisandre to extract Gendry's blood in small doses, at least for now -- hence the kinky S&M leech scenario that rather uncomfortably echoed Theon Greyjoy's last sexual hurrah.

Of course, only on "Game of Thrones" are you winning if you only have a leech full of your own blood ripped from your genitals.

I have one more thing to say about this, though: I despise Melisandre and suspect her Lord of Light is actually something closer to Lucifer (a name, after all, that can be translated "light-bringing"). But if a few drops of Gendry's genital blood can bring harm to Joffrey, then by God I say, "Slurp away, leeches!"

Speaking of Joffrey, how does he even come up with all these new ways of being an evil little shit? Like, where did he get the idea of giving Sansa away? And how would it even occur to him to remove Tyrion's little step ladder? (If Peter Dinklage wins an Emmy, it'll be for this episode.) The "bedding ceremony," on the other hand, is vintage Joffrey: It's an opportunity to humiliate and destroy just about everybody, all at once. How could he resist?

We'll come back to that in a moment, but first, attention must be paid to Cersei, who sets new records for bitchiness at this wedding. I hope Lena Headley enjoys playing these scenes because, in their own twisted way, they are a joy to watch. I loved the way Natalie Dormer's Margaery had to fake-smile her way around the room as Cersei told that terrifying story about the Rains of Castamere. And then, the threat at the end: This woman does not want to be called sister! And what about that little interlude with Loras? "Nobody cares what your father told you" -- and yet her entire life is dictated by what Tywin tells her. I believe they call that irony.

But back to Sansa, poor girl. I thought the nuptials in Lars Von Trier's "Melancholia" were nightmarish, but this wedding from hell might be worse -- except that, for all his drunkenness, Tyrion actually saves the day, twice. First, he foils Joffrey's wicked plan to strip Sansa naked in front of all the guests (and rape her later), and then he chooses decency over filial loyalty and elects not to consummate the marriage after all. This has the added benefit of scoring him points with Shae, who arrives in the morning to find Sansa's sheets pristine and unbloodied. Is it too much to hope that these three will work out an "arrangement"?

There was so much good acting in this episode, but I think Sophie Turner deserves a special mention for her portrayal of Sansa. In the first season, before her father was killed, Sansa seemed like just another vain, spoiled, rich girl. But she's been through hell, thanks to Joffrey, and has acquired a measure of character -- without ever quite losing the impatient-princess vibe that always set her apart from Arya. In a way, it wasn't surprising to learn that she's just 14. She's still naive and still arrogant, but she never stops growing. I wonder what she and Tyrion will achieve together.

Of all the achievements I might have imagined for Samwell Tarly, killing a White Walker was never one of them -- although, in retrospect, I probably should have guessed that this was coming. This whole sequence was brilliantly done, and I loved how the Hitchcockian cacophony of crows ratcheted up the suspense, only to go dead silent as the blue-eyed monster approached. Even the kitchen-sink drama inside the hut (OK, there's no kitchen sink, but you get my meaning) was engrossing. Gilly may not even know how first and last names work, but she's got an earthy appeal that definitely works for Sam. And she doesn't mind keeping warm with him under the furs, as long as he doesn't use too many fancy words.

I'm not clear what was going on with those crows, or why they wound up chasing Sam and Gilly through the night. But on the basis of this episode, I'm not going to assume the worst. Not yet, anyway.

"Game of Thrones" airs Sundays at 9 pm on HBO.

PHOTOS: The Easiest Way To Give Your Stuff A Fresh Look

2013-05-19T15:07:11Z

Sometimes the DIYs we come across on Pinterest are stunningly beautiful, but look extremely complicated to make ourselves. We prefer to just appreciate those projects via our computer screens. But, these paint-dipped crafts are the exception. Not only are they fabulous and colorful, they are super easy to create. And we're not lying.

So, take a look at the inspiration below and grab an accessory that needs a fresh new look. After a quick dunk in your favorite hue, you won't even recognize it.

1. Mugs

Photo by The Merry Thought

2. Votives

Photo by Nest Of Posies

3. Faux-Porcelain Bowl

Photo by Curbly

4. Wooden Utensils

Photo by Little Bit Funky

5. Ceramic Pots

Photo by The Lovely Cupboard

6. Flower Vases

Photo by Curbly

7. Bud Bases

Photo by Whipperberry

Be sure to check out our other great crafts in our slideshow below.

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David Briggs: Why Religious People Ignore Costs Of Marriage

2013-05-18T21:59:43Z

The economics of relationships are shifting, and generally not in a positive way for the institution of marriage.

The recession, the rising financial independence of women and cultural shifts and technological advances that make single-parent families more acceptable and feasible are contributing to fewer people walking down the aisle.

Religious groups are not immune to these trends, but new research indicates faith is a powerful force slowing the decline.

Regular church attenders marry at higher rates, divorce at lower rates, are less likely to engage in extramarital sex and have more children than the general population, one new study found.

And highly religious individuals are most likely to hold up traditional models of marriage despite the financial costs involved, including the loss of income when one parent cares full time for children.

In a separate study, nearly half of married white women raising young children who attended religious services more than once a week were not employed. In contrast, just 29 percent of women with low to moderate levels of religious participation did not hold an outside job.

The two studies presented at the recent annual meeting of the Association for the Study of Religion, Economics and Culture provide insights into why people of faith are more willing to pay the high costs of marriage and raising families even in an economic downturn.

"Religious incentives play a central role in marriage decisions and should play a role in any economic model of marriage," researcher Brian Hollar of Marymount University said in his presentation, "Holy matrimony, Batman! Why do the devout pay so much for marriage?"

The Marriage Benefit

There are unhappy and abusive unions, but research has indicated numerous benefits associated with married life. Married people, in general, live longer, are happier, have better mental health and are less likely to suffer from long-term illnesses or disabilities, studies have found.

Religious communities also may serve to "sanctify" marriages, endowing them with transcendent significance that can encourage couples to see their relationship in a favorable light, said researchers Frank Fincham of Florida State University and Steven Beach of the University of Georgia.

"Likewise, spiritual activities such as prayer may encourage greater focus on sustaining relationships and so increase positive behaviors in the relationship or enhance forgiveness or commitment," they wrote in an article reviewing research on marriage in the Journal of Marriage and Family.

But these benefits may also come at an economic price.

From 2000-2010, white, married fathers ages 25 to 54 who attended church at least two to three times a month earned on average $50,900, or almost $20,000 a year more than similarly devout single men ages 25 to 54, Hollar of Marymount University found in his study using data from the General Social Survey.

However, devout married white women earned $27,100 a year during the same period, or $7,000 a year less than single women who frequently attended services.

In fact, high levels of religious participation may be associated with the enduring gender gap in wages, suggests a separate study of white married women with young children that uses data from the 2006 to 2010 National Survey of Family Growth.

Forty-eight percent of women who attended services more than weekly and 39 percent of women who attended services weekly were not employed, reported economists Evelyn L. Lehrer and Yu Chen of the University of Illinois at Chicago.

The study also found religious attitudes emphasizing traditional gender roles in raising families influenced labor market choices. Forty-three percent of married mothers from conservative Protestant denominations were not employed, compared to 28 percent of mothers from mainline Protestant denominations.

Yet, weighed against the religious capital accrued through their faith, it is a sacrifice many Americans are willing to make.

Paying the Price

In examining General Social Survey data from 1972 to 2010, Hollar found decreasing rates of marriage across the board, but "a much more rapid drop-off" among those with lower ties to religion.

At any given age, Hollar found, "devout men are approximately 9.4 percent more likely to have married than non-devout men, and devout women are approximately 4.4 percent more likely to have married than non-devout women."

Similarly, frequent church attenders were much less likely to divorce, Hollar reported.

"Religion has a very positive effect on family. It has a very positive effect on strengthening marriage and reducing the possibility of divorce," Hollar noted.

And the sense of satisfaction is not just in the United States.

A study of adults in Great Britain, the Netherlands, Spain, Northern Ireland and Sweden found religious affiliation, religious attendance and marriage were all associated with greater happiness and satisfaction in life.

"Taken together, these three conclusions provide support among the people of contemporary Europe for Durkheim's classic thesis linking the two institutions of marriage and religion with human flourishing," researchers Emyr Williams, Leslie Francis and Andrew Village wrote in the journal of Mental Health, Religion and Culture.

That does not mean the pressures on marriage are going away. The wider array of choices available to women as their incomes rise and continued economic uncertainty among young adults, along with the greater acceptance of alternatives such as cohabitation and single-parent families, are having a significant impact.

But the potential financial costs or benefits are not all that matters in why people decide to get and stay married. Religious beliefs, including the idea of being part of a divinely ordained union, also can make a major difference.

David Briggs writes the Ahead of the Trend column for the Association of Religion Data Archives.

10 Date Ideas That Will Make You Feel Like A Kid Again

2013-05-18T17:05:18Z

By Natalie Gontcharova for YourTango.com

Even the most loving, stable relationship can end up in a frustrating rut. There you are again on a weekday night, too lazy to cook so you order takeout, and fighting about what to watch on TV.

Remember when you first started dating? Everything was full of wonder, a sense of possibility ... you were positively childlike.

Here are a few ways to recreate that special time by acting like kids again. Who knew children had so much to teach us about relationships?

Catch Up On Cartoons
Spend a morning watching cartoons with milk and cookies. I know single adults who partake in this activity on a regular basis, so there's no shame in donning PJs and doing these kidlike things with your significant other.

Take An Art Class
Take your mind off the everyday work grind by learning a new skill. Try a pottery class, painting class or some other workshop that lets you make something together. You might even take a useful household object home.

Hang With Kids
Play with kids, if you have them -- or maybe you have a favorite niece or family friend. Treat them to a day at the zoo or playground and really listen to what they have to say. It'll be humbling and maybe even help you decide if you want to have kids in the future.

Spend A Day At The Arcade
Remember how you could easily spend the entire day at the arcade? From bumper cars to lasertag, these kids' games haven't lost their fun. Head to the nearest indoor amusement center and have a blast together.

Laugh Until It Hurts
Go to a stand-up comedy club. If it's a small, intimate venue, you're likely to get picked on by the comedians -- they always seem to love singling out couples. You'll have both hilarious and embarrassing memories to share.

Have a Playful Picnic
It's springtime, and Memorial Day is creeping up on us. Plan a picnic in the park or go strolling along the beach while munching on cotton candy. You can relive your favorite boardwalk memories by returning to the beaches you frequented when you were younger.

Play With The Pooch
Walk the dog together. Playing with pets always calls up memories of childhood.

Go Rock Climbing
Remember the monkey bars? Rekindle your love of climbing by heading to an indoor rock-climbing gym together -- or rough it with some outdoor rock climbing.

Play Ball
Rediscover some favorite childhood team sports, like soccer or kickball, by joining a league together.

Eat Like A Kid
Remember how much you wanted to have a huge ice cream sundae for breakfast or pizza for every meal? Spend a day eating like a kid. Chicken fingers, grilled cheese, cookies -- bring it on.

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Click through the slideshow below for even more great date ideas.

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WATCH: Why You Shouldn't Go To IKEA With A Loved One

2013-05-18T12:45:03Z

In this classic scene from "30 Rock," Liz Lemon puts her relationship to the ultimate test: IKEA. We find that the scene isn't so far from the truth. We've seen those fights. And maybe even have been part of those fights.

We really couldn't think of a better way to salute Tina Fey on her 43rd birthday.

What's worse than IKEA? Moving. Here are our worst stories.

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Do you have a home story idea or tip? Email us at homesubmissions@huffingtonpost.com. (PR pitches sent to this address will be ignored.)

8 Crazy-Expensive Gifts Celebs Have Given Their Spouses

2013-05-17T23:12:29Z

Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris recently made headlines after the Playboy founder gave his 27-year-old wife a rather expensive gift, even by celebrity standards -- a $5 million modern home in the Hollywood Hills.

But Hef isn't the only star to spoil his spouse. Click through the slideshow below for more on Hefner and Harris and seven other celebrity couples who gave each other some seriously pricey presents.

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John Legend's Fiancee Talks Pre-Wedding Anxiety

2013-05-17T22:21:44Z

Everyone gets a little nervous before they tie the knot, even supermodels!

John Legend's fiancee, Chrissy Teigen, opened up to the New York Daily News earlier this week about her pre-wedding stress, telling the newspaper that she'll definitely need a dose of Xanax before tying the knot. “I have such bad anxiety that sometimes I don’t believe I’ve even taken the pill in the morning!" she said.

Teigen has previously revealed that she'll wear a Vera Wang gown, and Legend said that he may play one of his own songs, "All of Me," at the couple's reception. Teigen told Cosmopolitan this week that fellow models Brooklyn Decker and Erin Andrews will be among her bridesmaids.

Legend and Teigen met in 2007 on the set of Legend's music video for "Stereo" and got engaged in 2011.

Click through the slideshow below to see photos of the couple.

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Frank A. Weil: The Secret of Staying Married

2013-05-17T22:12:22Z

A recent conversation about two friends who were enjoying a super second marriage with a bevy of nice kids and grands led to a bit of speculation about later marriage, divorce and why long marriages are going the way of dinosaurs.

The first point made was that second marriages often fail for the same reason that the first one failed, meaning the spouse (and this, of course, works both ways) marries again more or less the same person he/she married the first time. And although hope trumps experience in affairs of the heart, it's hardly surprising that these "do-over" marriages (and "double do-overs!") beget the same problems that doomed the original.

Then the conversation turned to what had enabled the two people talking to have between them 122 years of marriage. It was noted that in some cultures it had been acceptable and customary to actually have three marriages for the three basic stages in married life.

Stage one is romantic -- perhaps mainly driven by sex.

Stage two is purposeful -- focused on creating and raising promising human beings.

Stage three is practical -- focused on common interests and simple friendship.

Of course, not all male/female married couples have children. And, there also obviously is a quite wide spectrum of intensity and lasting importance of the sex element. And, many marriages have survived despite a near dearth of common interests and pure friendship but most marriages need that to get through the first two stages.

We agreed that if a marriage begins in shared interests and friendship, as well as those other desirable elements, it has a much better chance of lasting through all three stages. Aside from well-known marriages of convenience and necessity, little information is available to indicate what factors drive the decision to marry in the first place.

In today's world many more marriages begin a lot later than in the era of the two in the conversation. That suggests that more marriages may be prompted by the priorities of the second stage, when children enter the picture (and hopefully after the two people have discovered both common interests and pure friendship). People of a certain age would cite the "looser mores" of contemporary society as diminishing the importance of the first stage, which in any event may be going away, almost entirely.

What was common to the two long single marriages was the belief that both had moved seamlessly through all three stages, coupled with a belief that the temptations inevitable during a long-term relationship were not attractive enough to warrant change.

So what, if any value, is there in these observations?

One, more research on the subject might shed more light on what is really going on out there and why.

Two, whatever research may reveal, and whatever value that might add to modern society, it certainly cannot hurt to share this kind of common sense with ones' grandchildren and great grandchildren!

For better or for worse!