Obama Inhaling Draws Criticism

Reports from multiple sources confirm that President Obama keeps inhaling, and this has sparked a new wave of criticism from the President's political opponents.

"He's been blithely pursuing this policy entirely on his own, of course," said John Boehner, House Republican leader, "without even his usual hollow claim of bipartisan consultation, but the American people weren't born yesterday -- and they weren't born in Kenya, either -- and they're well aware of it."

Boehner's Senate counterpart, Mitch McConnell, said, "Frankly, I'm a little more worried about all that secret exhaling he must be doing. I think the American people need to know more about it."

"Hey,' said Michael Steele, chairman of the Republican National committee, "nobody is saying the guy shouldn't be breathing. At least, I don't think anybody is saying that -- I'm certainly not saying that! -- although, as you know the President himself has pointed out, there are extremists on both sides. But some of us can't help wondering, does he have to breathe so much? Watch him! He never stops. I mean, what about our young people? Our seniors? Is there gonna be any oxygen left?"

Senator Jim Inhofe (R-OK) said he wasn't a bit surprised at the revelation. "Of course he inhales and exhales, on and on, one extra added governmental process after the other. It's so clearly wasteful -- and typically Democrat -- squandering of our most precious resource, which, by the way, is obviously not too warm for him, is it? Whatever his public position. Besides," he said, "there's not a shred of evidence to back up any part of this crackpot respiration-theory. It's bad science, just more fear-mongering. The one thing we do know for sure is that if Barack Hussein Obama and all his Czars are doing it, over and over, as fast as they can, it's not going to be good for the American economy."

On his radio program, Rush Limbaugh weighed in. "Obama should think about demonstrating how much he truly believes in what he so publicly professes," Limbaugh taunted, "by holding all that breath . . . yeah, let him hold it . . . until a meaningful health care reform bill lands on his desk. And I guess we'll know who to blame then, when he breathes again, won't we, Olympia Snowe?"

When reporters approached Sarah Palin, she put down the latest issue of Foreign Affairs and wondered if some of that air that President Obama keeps inhaling and exhaling with such thoughtless, reckless abandon might not be put to a little bit better use by our troops in Iran and Afghanistan, whom she continues to support. (John McCain, contacted by reporters, said he did too.)

A spokesman for Mrs. Palin later confirmed that she meant to say "Iraq."

Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, deluged with questions from the White House Press Corps, assured reporters that "Absolutely nothing has changed since the President took office." Moving quickly to clarify, Gibbs added, "President Obama, like most --if not all -- of his predecessors of either party, remains absolutely committed to both inhaling and exhaling. It's a non-issue," Gibbs insisted.

Comments

[Duppy]

I just cannot understand the Repugs. They need to speak sensibly and work with the President if they want to be reelected. I wait for the day when a new leader of the party emerges. None of these guys can lead. No one expects them to agree on everything but it is totally rediculous when they disagree with everything our POTUS wants for the country. Yes, the American people "weren't born yesterday" Mr. Boneher. They can see right through the Repug spin.

[dfranz]

Obama is an awesome man, a wonderful father and a great role model for our country. His presidency will go down in American History with the greats, unlike his predessor. He returns the vitrol spewed at him from the right with dignity and tremendous self control. He reaches his hand out and they spit at it. But try as they may to define him on their own terms, the more dirt they try to throw at him, the worse they look for it.