Much has been written about love, far better than anything I could conceive. But as my chemistry changed in the last few days, and the holy ghost of love descended upon her latest prey, I too need to write about her, in the hope that it might sound or feel familiar, reverberating an ancient emotion you might have had, now have or will feel.
Love is to souls what gravity is to matter. It is a force whose purpose is to unite, to bring together, to connect what was before separated from oneness. Falling in love is a sample of what it might feel in the moment we attain enlightenment and return home into the light. Love releases dopamine and make us beautiful. It is contagious and allows us to share our love with others. It fashions creativity, awakens the sleeper, and morphs our dreams, just as it does our bank accounts. It creates opportunities, opens doors that were cemented, paths that were blocked.
So why does it make us cry? Why is it painful?
Love's affinity is with oneness. But when we are bound by space and time - the two Lords of Duality - our love experiences challenges right when she takes her first breath. These two grand dividers, work their mischief and plot to keep lover from beloved. The armies of Space-Time find creative ways to separate and inflict doubt: long distance relationships; different time zones; dissimilar stages in life; different backgrounds; past relationship traumas; past lifetime strains; fear; abandonment; intimacy issues; sexual hang-ups; addictions; and whatever else they can conjure. Space-Time conspires against the magic of love that is experienced whenever two souls recognize each other. The heart screams, the eyes tear, the throat tightens, butterflies swarm in the solar plexus. Love is the bridge between the two to the one but duality, by definition, suffers from perpetual fear of abandonment and refuses to let experience the ecstasy of union.
However, love is stronger. Love delights in bending time and space, just as space and time try to break love. We day and night dream about our lover, and like the Queen of Hearts, remembering forward love scenes that never happened. Conjuring conversation, imagining moments, collecting synchronicities and signs, affirmations that pile up to tell us that "Yes! Your lover is indeed your beloved."
Was I happier before love came for a visit? Perhaps. Comfortably numb, blissful in the ignorance of my current state. Inspiration, love's shadow, always lingers on the wall, helping ease the pain, but never heal it. I think, nay, I feel, I am in love. And the funny thing is, that love does not care if you want her or not, she just is. She looks at you with her seductive smirk, as if saying, "Deal with it."
The devil is in the details, the sages say. I think the devil is in division. And indeed the word Diablo, from Ancient Greek, means "to divide." The devil represents our fears, mainly our fear of survival. So whatever love you experience, to a lover, to your job, to your child, or project, know this: the only thing standing in your way is fear of connection. And true, love does not last forever (time), and it cannot always be with you (space), but it is a constant reminder of what awaits for us at the end of our journey as mortals: the union with the One, the oneness with light - Enlightenment.
LOVE AND BE-LOVED IN RETURN
gahl