Sex: What He Really Wants (And Is Afraid to Ask For)

Do you want the scoop on what your guy really wants, but is maybe too bashful to ask you for? I polled both regular men and sexuality experts to get the inside information. Here's what they told me.
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By Johanna Lyman for KnowMore.tv's GalTime

Do you want the scoop on what your guy really wants, but is maybe too bashful to ask you for? I polled both regular men and sexuality experts to get the inside information. Here's what they told me...

What He Really Wants in Bed

1. More oral sex. I'm sure this isn't a surprise to anyone. But what was surprising was that they don't necessarily want only oral. Guys, at least the ones I talked to, like to think of a little oral as the perfect foreplay. Sounds like a great idea to me, especially if it's reciprocated.

2. A private lap dance. From you, not from some random stripper. The gentleman who shared this insight also noted that he couldn't care less if his girlfriend doesn't have the body of a stripper. The point is that she's giving him a private lap dance: a special treat just for him. Men are visual creatures; having his girlfriend shake her booty in front of him would be a huge turn on. Heck, they even have classes in studios now that teach women how to do a strip tease.

3. Take charge sometimes. After a long day at work, making decisions and getting things done, sometimes your man just wants to be told what to do. Grab him by his tie and lead him into the bedroom. You don't have to become a "Christian Grey" type dom, just take the initiative and let him come along for the ride (pun intended).

4. Show him he's still desirable. Men's egos are fragile, too. Sometimes he wants you to initiate sex because he's tired of being in charge, but there's often a bigger, more intimidating reason: he wants to feel desired by you. He's really asking for intimacy, not just sex.

5. Stop the games. "Fine" is one of the most confusing words a man ever hears from his partner. He usually knows it means "not fine," but can never quite figure out what it really means. Say what you mean, and mean what you say... both in and out of the bedroom. Let him know what works for you. He can handle it. Plus, being up front and honest goes a long way to building trust, which is the best way to stay in a relationship for the long haul.

Have some fun with some or all of these suggestions, and watch for the surprise, gratitude, and admiration on his face. And remember, even the best relationships take some work.

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