Physical feelings of pain are familiar signals to us all. In general we note the discomfort and naturally make attempts to correct the cause. This is our innate intelligence at work. And when the pain is simple, and simple corrections are made, all is well. The sensation of pain is forgotten until the next time it is needed.
Emotional pains are usually not simple, and when they grow into emotional suffering, they can influence the entire worldview of their host. We either know directly from our own experience or through our empathy with others' experience that some really terrible things happen to hurt people emotionally. Unjust things done to innocent people. Things we cannot in good conscience blithely dismiss as "perfect."
It is natural that a story arises with emotional pain. There is usually an event or a person that "causes" the pain. It may be initially important to tell the story and learn the lessons, or take whatever action is appropriate. Quite often that event or person also echoes earlier versions of emotional pain with similar stories. As legitimate as the story (or stories) may be, when they are played and replayed in the thought process, emotional pain grows into emotional suffering. The pain then becomes a signal of all that has gone or could go wrong, rather than a simple signal for correction. And yet when emotional pain is met without the inevitable story that arises with it, it too disappears from memory in the same way simple physical pain does.
Often we believe that to stop retelling the story of emotional pain is to somehow be disloyal to ourselves. We feel that in staying true to the story of our hurts we are being true to ourselves! Because of this (false) ideal of self-loyalty, we then begin to define ourselves by our emotional pain. To define yourself by your emotional pain is to suffer unnecessarily.
Pain that is met consciously does not grow into suffering. To suffer we need time and a continuing story. "My mother...." "He or she or they...." "I am or am not..." To continue the story guarantees the birth and continuance of suffering, and the avoidance of the pure feeling underneath all internal dialogue.
The "correction" for emotional pain may initially feel counterintuitive. Rather than moving away from the pain, we must meet emotional pain directly and intimately. It is an intimate meeting. Only you and your pain are present. And that requires that all other characters in your story of causes and betrayals and injustices be temporarily erased. It requires the intimacy of becoming one with the pain. Not in an indulgent, dramatic version of "Me Being One With The Pain," but a simple and sober quiet merger of attention into the sensation of pain.
Where do you feel the hurt? If you let your full attention fall into that area, leaving behind any part of any story about what caused it, even leaving the names pain and hurt behind, you discover pure energy. When we don't judge this energy, even if it feels uncomfortable or worse, we can get even closer. We can get so close that we are actually one with it. And we can stop there. We can simply be there, in the spaciousness of the endless open mind.
The challenge then is to give up the identity of the one who was or is being hurt. That giving up only requires us to stop retelling the story of how we were hurt, who hurt us, how badly it hurts, why it shouldn't have happened, and on and on and on.
In simply refusing to tell that story again, you have the immediate opportunity to meet directly the pain underneath the story. That's all that is needed for the suffering to be finished!
If the emotional suffering reappears, there is some story attached to it. Again, you have the choice to release the story and intimately meet the pain.
Pain that is unmet becomes suffering.
Pain that is met is not pain.
Please see for yourself and let me know!
Gangaji will be in Boston for a public meeting September 12th, and in Woodstock for a public meeting September 14. She will hold a seven day retreat at Garrison Institute, NY, beginning September 16th. Read more about Gangaji's events and catalog of books and videos online.
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My story is all that I see and for whatever reason my identification with it is reaching the point of being unbearable.
A long time ago I was going through much suffering so I tried doing something I had
read in a book: I sat with the pain. I dropped the story of the suffering. I took the label off the emotion and felt it as energy. Before long I was smiling due to this incredible feeling of bliss. That was a long time ago. Now it seems the story is all I see and it's getting worse. I can't drop below it. I truly feel as if I am going to go crazy. Every waking moment is consumed with suffering and this desire to be free from suffering.
You stated that you asked for help, gangaji, and the universe brought you to papaji. Are all deeply sincere cries for help answered? How will I know if an answer comes? How can I be open enough to recognize it?
Thank you!
What I am cannot.
Untouched by suffering or bliss.
You showed me That.
Days later, quite related, I broke into uproarious laughter. I was supposed to lead an event but all I could do was laugh. It was uncontrollable. Soon, everyone present was laughing. I saw how my mind absolutely loved to entertain itself and others with stories of betrayal. When I finished laughing, I shared this with everyone which lead to many connected and authentic sharings from others.
After that, I could not find one person in the universe who ever betrayed me. Although situations have occurred that could be labeled betrayal, as I have been taught, I do not see it anywhere. Since this occurrence, it has been a wonderful consistent experience to know that everyone I ever met and am meeting is completely fine. There is love, there is separation and beneath it all is steady nothing.
(Sharing continued…)
Dr. Laurie Moore
www.animiracles.com
As the seesaw continues, I was in another feeling state when Gangaji wrote today’s invitation. I was doing ho oponopono, fully convinced that I had contributed to energetic patterns that did not serve people. I was dredging up things I did well meaningly that did not turn out as I had expected. I was really into praying for anyone I had disappointed. I was in unbearable pain over it.
In stopping, it became evident that everyone was fine. Two people I was ho oponoponoing got in touch with me. They were fine. Everyone was working-out whatever they chose to for their life. Peace was clear within them regardless of whatever mental or emotional state was at play for them.
Inside the tunnels of my body into consciousness was peace. Inside my heart was a deep love. Each being I encountered was shinning light. No words were left; only silence and truly not knowing a thing. Each moment took care of itself. If the Divine Mother was needed she came through. If bliss was needed it was here. If compassion was required it showed up.
I realized that my mind and emotions might, like the weather, continue to have a variety of expression and reception states. Simultaneously, the foundation was a continuous completeness beyond any words.
Thank you Gangaji,
Dr. Laurie Moore
www.animiracles.com