Get Shorty!

Senator: Are you now or have you ever been a legal progressive?
Nominee: What's a "legal progressive"? I'm not sure I know what you mean by that term.
Senator: I take it that's a "yes."
Nominee: No, it's not a "yes."
Senator: Is it a "maybe"?
Nominee: I suppose it's possible.
Senator: Good! You admit it's possible. Well, then, are you now or have you ever been a member of a legal progressive-front organization?
Nominee: I don't know. If you give me an example of such an organization, I can tell you whether I've ever been a member.
Senator: Ha! It's not that easy.
Nominee: So it would appear.
Senator: Have you ever provided material support to any legal progressive-front organization?
Nominee: Sigh.
Senator: Are any of your work associates, neighbors, friends or acquaintances - past, present or future - involved in any way with any legal progressive-front organization?
Nominee: Senator, this is ridiculous.
Senator: Good! Now we're getting somewhere. So, tell me, have you ever read any judicial opinions by Thurgood Marshall, William Douglas, Earl Warren or William Brennan?
Nominee: Of course.
Senator: They were legal progressives, right? Right?
Nominee: If that's what you want to label them.
Senator: Well, then, how would you label them?
Nominee: I'd say they were Justices you don't like very much.
Senator: Ah, ha! Do you know a man called Barack Hussein Obama?
Nominee: I'm proud to say that I do.
Senator: You admit that he's a legal progressive, right?
Nominee: He can speak for himself.
Senator: Did Thurgood Marshall call you "Shorty"?
Nominee: He did. It was a term of affection, at least I hope it was. Certainly, it was descriptive.
Senator: Wasn't it really your secret code name as a legal progressive co-conspirator?
Nominee: Senator, I've never had an alias, and I have no idea what you're talking about.
Senator: I have in my hand a list. . . .

 

 

 

Comments

[Json]

04:58 PM on 07/01/2010

Shouldn't satire be more absurd? This is an entirely plausible exchange.

[amleth]

01:06 PM on 07/01/2010

Clearly we have finally reached the point where satire and reality are identical.

[Jannsmoor]

11:44 AM on 07/01/2010

Point well taken Professor Stone. If you believe that justice is blind and all people are entitled to equal treatment before the law, you are probably a legal progressive and if the right wing has their way, you need to be rooted out of government and sent off to some Communist country or a re-education camp.

[DrObvious]

11:31 AM on 07/01/2010

Ha! Thank goodness she is tall enough for her feet to reach the ground. Now about that activist agenda she doesn't have ....

[WASanford]

10:39 AM on 07/01/2010

This post is a little befuddling! Was this an actual interrogation, or was it made up in order to illustrate a point? It seems as if it might have been an exchange between Senator Jeff Sessions and the candidate, but I missed that and have only seen parts of it. Being a Progressive or a Liberal is not a crime or even misbehavior and should not disqualify anyone from any position, especially in our government.

[talkstocoyotes]

11:09 AM on 07/01/2010

"Being a Progressive or a Liberal is not a crime or even misbehavior and should not disqualify anyone from any position, especially in our government. "

Um, I believe that was the whole point.

[mattbass83]

11:17 AM on 07/01/2010

It's satire. You are either supposed to laugh, not get it or be really, really upset.

[scottsincoherentrambling]

09:49 AM on 07/01/2010

Huh?

[mattbass83]

11:17 AM on 07/01/2010

It's satire.

[scottsincoherentrambling]

08:21 AM on 07/03/2010

Yea. I figured that was the idea, but it was very poorly executed. Hence my first statement "Huh?"

[mcthfg]

01:19 AM on 07/01/2010

Prof. Stone - smart and funny?

Have you been reading Chris Kelly?