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George Schlatter Headshot

El Rushbo the Clown

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All weekend, America was bombarded with the (half) wit and (illusive) wisdom of the new head of and self-proclaimed spokesman for the Republicans. I speak of course, about the beached Orca Whale, Rush "Limp-baugh" and his "hate mate," little Ann Coulter.

The Republicans want to block the reinstitution of the Fairness Doctrine and the Equal Time laws to prevent what they fear would be censorship of the right wing dominated radio propagandists.

Personally, I do not want equal time. If anything, give them even more time. My point is that every time we hear the Balloon Buffoon, El Rushbo Limbaugh jiggle his jowls and puff out his chubby little cheeks as he again explains to us why he is so passionate about wanting "Obama to fail," the Democratic Party gets stronger and stronger. Rush would make more sense wearing a red rubber nose and big clown shoes.

The more this recovering druggie is heard, the better off we are. I say put him on 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and have him joined by Bulldog Hannity and The Luffa King, Bill O'Reilly as well as the recovering alcoholic, Glen "Burp" Beck and Ann Coulter.

Hearing these people is great for America. Diet doctors say the best way to lose weight is to stand naked in front of a mirror. The Fox propagandists do that intellectually every day, but all they lose is credibility.

When we are given even more of an opportunity to ingest and digest the fecal matter that they spew so passionately, we become aware that all they are really doing is selling their books. Ann Coulter never misses an opportunity to explain that she has written best-selling books, but then "Mein Kampf" sold well, too, so evidently there is a market for every kind of taste.

Bill O'Reilly constantly pushes his hats, bumper stickers, tick-y tack-y bath mats and various other Fox News propaganda paraphernalia while Sean Hannity continues on with his nightly impression of Gilbert Gottfried. Hearing these people is the best way to expose them as propagandists who are a little like the carnival barkers playing three-card Monte with us, while hawking their jams and jellies, lotions and potions, combs, brushes and Mamma Leone's Munchie Mocha Milk Chocolates. Perhaps Rush should share with "Free Willie" the huge shipment of Viagra pills he got busted for smuggling into the USA.

Of course, all of them refuse to have an open debate with anyone like Arianna Huffington, or Joy Behar, or Rachel Maddow or Randi Rhodes or Stephanie Miller with an unbiased, independent moderator like Jeff Greenfield and the absence of the dreaded Fox kill button and the infamous "last word" after the abused and confused guest interview victim has departed, they would be at a considerable disadvantage.

The righteous, right-wing bullhorns live in these little "Fox holes" where they are protected by the Murdoch Millions and can threaten retaliation as Bill O'Reilly did when he made what is rumored to be a huge payoff to the female employee who sued him for sexual harassment. The rumor also was that the multi-million dollar settlement was followed with the threat of more lawsuits from numerous other innocent young female employees who Billy Boy had pursued in his late night "luffa calls."

I remember hearing Wild Bill explain that, if anyone else even threatened another sexual harassment lawsuit, he would inflict his full wrath on them, along with the vengeance of Roger Ailes and the vast wealth of Rupert Murdoch, all of which would come crashing down upon their heads. Evidently, that discouraged those victimized maidens threatening Mr. O'Reilly with similar actions resulting from his nocturnal proclivities.

The more frequently we are treated to the O'Reilly/Fox "talking points" and the more our ears are pierced with the shrill whining of Ann Coulter and the buffoon-like explosions from the ample mouth of El Rushbo, the more credible the Huffington Post becomes and the more we can enjoy the intelligent observations of Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow.

For all of these reasons, we must earnestly appeal to the Congress and the Senate not to bring back the Equal Time/Fairness Doctrine, but to allow the political commentator/comedians I mentioned more time, not less.