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Gotham Chopra

Gotham Chopra

Posted: September 3, 2009 05:12 PM

One More for Michael Jackson


I thought long and hard about whether to go on CNN tonight and once again talk about my late friend Michael Jackson. Months ago when he died, I did a flurry of interviews, mostly on CNN and with Larry King, and got a lot of positive feedback for some of the things I said about Michael. Viewers wrote to me in droves via email, Facebook, and Twitter; there were grateful that I had "humanized" him. It was natural to me to recollect Michael more as a friend - I knew him from when I was just a kid on through my college years, my first few years out in the working world, getting married and becoming a father - rather than try to analyze the pendulum of his career from iconic rock-star to scandal plagued celebrity. I was close to him as he endured both phases, and what was remarkable was that he stayed largely the same guy underneath - staggeringly intelligent and wildly irreverent, deeply spiritual but quintessentially cynical. Michael was cool, but he was also conflicted. He was forever a contradiction, a creative visionary who wanted to heal the world, but could barely keep his own life together.

Part of the reason I was ambivalent about going on TV tonight was because I'm not attending the memorial service/burial today in which he is finally being laid to rest. The reasons for that were various. To tick off a few: frankly, because it's really weird to me that he died 2.5 months ago and still had not been buried (in the Hindu tradition, the body must be disposed off within two days, and not that I am even very Hindu, but come on...); because I sensed the service would be more of the same - a circus of attention seekers and media - and I didn't really want to be a part of it; and because, well, I don't think I was really invited by his family or lawyers or post-death entourage, whoever is running the show. I'm not surprised, nor disappointed. I was good friends with Michael, not his parents nor many siblings, not his wonderful children, nor the many in his entourage who always seemed to be around, and appear just as plentiful and voracious in his death. On the former (the family), this has no doubt been a conflicted time for them as well. When I was with him the last few years, Michael intimated a deep respect for many of the members of his family, but he didn't profess a real intimacy with them in recent times. He loved his brothers deeply but he didn't ache to re-establish the famous fraternity the world once knew. Then again, what do I know?

Still, today it feels like some closure is upon us. Michael gets to go underground, which is perhaps a place he may finally find some peace. That said, I could have sworn he once told me he wanted to be cremated when he was all done. Strike that from the record, though, if it means now we have to go through another circus with him and his body. This is all turning a little too Thriller for me...

In our Eastern traditions of course, we do actually draw a distinction between him and his body. To me, Michael left us a long time ago. His soul certainly lingers around us - our recollections of him, our celebrations of his art and our time with him - but his body is just some empty vessel, a symbol I suppose that others feel necessary to put through various rituals and sacraments so as to officially sign off on his death and departure. Even the sadness of the day - it's more for us than it is for him.

Whatever the case, in the weeks and months and years ahead we will all celebrate Michael in different ways. I am working on something myself, a creative project he and I had started together a while ago and over the years were quietly nurturing with no certain deadline to show the world. After he died, I dove back into my archives and aggregated all the notes, the outlines, and sketches - okay I am giving too much away - and looked them over. I was overwhelmed. The story Michael was telling was both haunting and heartening. I'm committed to it now more than ever and hopeful it can be shared with the world someday very soon.

Right, so I'm leaning toward a CNN appearance tonight because, well, I like talking baseball during the breaks with Larry and because I've kind of enjoyed my role "humanizing" Michael Jackson, whatever that means.

Final story (for now): a couple of years ago, Michael became briefly obsessed with an assortment of Indian saints - some living, others dead - Gurus who gleaned pop-culture fame for their dissertations on things like meditation, consciousness, the art of happiness, critical mass effect, and other esoteric spiritual themes. More than their message, Michael was obsessed with the men. He'd call me in the middle of the night after having watched some obscure video on one of these guys. "They seem so at peace," he said in one of those calls, "so pure and happy."

"It's 3 AM, man," I answered.

My wife groaned: "It's Michael, isn't it?" She rolled over and went back to sleep.

"Nobody is that pure and happy, Gotham."

"If you say so," I croaked back.

"Those guys eat cows, don't they?" He whispered.

"What?"

"Aren't cows holy in India? I bet those guys eat cows when no one is looking." He laughed.

"You're strange and I'm going back to sleep." I said.

"Okay Brown (one of his many nicknames for me), go back to sleep. I'll find out the truth when I see those guys in Heaven." He hung up.

Now's your chance, Mike. RIP.

Gotham Chopra blogs a lot at www.intent.com

Follow Gotham Chopra on Twitter: www.twitter.com/gothamchopra

I thought long and hard about whether to go on CNN tonight and once again talk about my late friend Michael Jackson. Months ago when he died, I did a flurry of interviews, mostly on CNN and with Larry...
I thought long and hard about whether to go on CNN tonight and once again talk about my late friend Michael Jackson. Months ago when he died, I did a flurry of interviews, mostly on CNN and with Larry...
 
 
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05:40 PM on 10/02/2009
If someone considers themselves a friend of Michael's, then they should unequivocally state Michael is innocent of all charges. Until then, I consider them a fair weather friend of Jackson's.

Mr. Chopra, like it or not, the reality is you are part of the circus of attention seekers and media. You and your father skirt around the issue when asked directly if Michael could have abused those boys, and yet I see both of you making the media rounds. - Pathetic!
08:54 PM on 09/06/2009
Such a sad ending to an artificially elevated career. Michael was enormously popular for his energy on stage, but he was a stunted man in a teenage body and psyche. His voice was twittery, reticent, and often artificially loud, not resonant like a fully developed man. His songs and lyrics never reached beyond his adolescence.
11:15 PM on 09/06/2009
So I take it you're not a fan? Seriously, NO ONE, in any field, can maintain a career at as high a level and for as long as Michael Jackson did by "artificial" elevation. He was a one-of-a-kind genius of a performer.
03:52 PM on 09/07/2009
Humanistic,
Excuse me, please go through Michael's catalogue before making the judgement!! Have you listened to 'Stranger in Moscow' or 'Give in to me'?

Michael was not one of the most loved artists across the globe for no reason! He could dance like no one else could ever do. He could sing with his soul and he has done some great amount of charity with his music and fame.

Nevertheless, even if his voice wasn't that of a alpha male, why does it matter? Who said all great singers have to sound in a certain way? We all are different by genes. This is how God has created us. It's better we respect the difference and appreciate humanity.
08:32 PM on 09/06/2009
Can we please give him a rest. We're tired of talking of Michael. Talk about this children, their future, what they like, anything but Michael. Unless, it is something new about Michael, no gossip, we know he was talented but had issues.
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rsprags
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11:35 PM on 09/06/2009
We who?, please save yourself the grief do not read or post a comment on any articles about him.
Do not watch any shows/reports about him! This will give you a lot of relief from all the MJJ stuff. I use that example as it relates to any thing on a network or print media owned by ru pert like Fox, NYP, WS, ETC; and it has assisted me to have a much more peaceful life. I hope this little tidbit will help you!
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blaqntelligence
10:03 AM on 09/08/2009
"We're tired of talking of Michael."

Please speak for yourself, I still mourn Michael Jackson and enjoy discussion with other supporters and fans.
03:52 PM on 09/06/2009
I appreciate you discussing your friend Michael Jackson. However, I believe if you ask twenty people about MJ you will get twenty different answers which to me means that no one really knew him. I just wish him peace in his next life and hopefully his children will have a full and blessed life.
10:00 AM on 09/06/2009
Gotham, when you say, "...because, well, I don't think I was really invited by his family or lawyers or post-death entourage, whoever is running the show" I want to say it's fine to admit point blank that you weren't invited. After all, Elizabeth Taylor allowed it to be known that she was unhappy about being seated with the general public at the memorial.
07:39 AM on 09/06/2009
I, too, was disturbed by the 2.5 months of his body being in limbo. Recently his brother, Randy, has stated he was dismayed by the helicopters circling above the outdoor funeral. These types of
statements seem ridiculous because the Jackson family allowed live feed of the funeral up until it began. If they didn't want helicopters trying to get a peek, why wasn't it indoors and out of sight private...I think Michael Jackson was a victim of too much money and too much fame; so much so, no one would say no to him and in the end the excess of everything did him in. I may get slammed for saying this but I think he loved his kids but from I have seen with all addicted people, everyone, including children, come in second after the drugs. Were his kids first, he would have gone into rehab instead he just found enablers because he had the money to pay for whatever he wanted. Sad because he was so very talented.
03:42 AM on 09/06/2009
"In our Eastern traditions of course, we do actually draw a distinction between him and his body. To me, Michael left us a long time ago. His soul certainly lingers around us - our recollections of him, our celebrations of his art and our time with him - but his body is just some empty vessel, a symbol I suppose that others feel necessary to put through various rituals and sacraments so as to officially sign off on his death and departure. Even the sadness of the day - it's more for us than it is for him."
09:06 PM on 09/05/2009
Yes, no one is pure and happy. Michael is so right. But people claim so all the time.

Michael was human too, with happiness and sorrows, drawbacks and greatness. The sad part is that the world just wanted to see him pure and happy and when we saw anything else, we called him a weirdo, we outcasted him. We never thought Michael was human and never allowed him to be one. It's all perhaps because he had certain genius abilities that none of us had. He could bring us all happiness, divinity and magic through his art. I do truly believe the world was unfair to him. Nevertheless, his service to the world of dance, music, entertainment and humanitarianism has been more than extraordinary and larger than life, though the other aspects of his life were as human as everyone else.

Thank you Gotham.
01:05 AM on 09/06/2009
Beautifully said, Shamone. We projected on to him...we wanted him to more than human. When he really did seem human--brilliant and flawed--just like everyone else, we shunned him, due to our own need for perfection. The world, especially the USA was unfair to him and at time, inhuman towards him. Regardless, his humility, humanitarian efforts and his artistry was magnificent and larger than life. And that in itself was his sacred service to the world.
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Irish55
09:39 AM on 09/06/2009
Well said. I think the general public could never see Michael as anything other than an icon - never as just a man - with all the frailties and foibles that come with being a human being. How sad that we could never let him just be 'Mike'.

I really look forward to seeing/hearing the creative project that Gotham and Michael worked on together.

Thank you to all his true friends, like Gotham, who knew Mike. What amazing memories you must have - thank you for sharing some of them.
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Cherubim
08:28 PM on 09/05/2009
Gotham, I enjoyed reading this article.
You have done a good job on your Larry King appearances.
I thank you for being a good friend to Michael Jackson.
Please do finish the "creative project" you began working on
with Michael Jackson. I look forward to its revelation.
03:47 PM on 09/05/2009
When...WHEN....do we get to be through with the hoopla about this person?
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situationcritical
SuperMegaUltraUberLiberal
10:49 PM on 09/05/2009
When there is no hoopla over any of the world's other legends.
01:16 AM on 09/06/2009
Do you have a channel changer on your TV?
Is there an X inside a little red box up in the right hand corner of your screen?
You're in control. You're not a victim.
We (the rest of us) aren't quiet done.
01:54 PM on 09/05/2009
I appreciated the antidote as well, but Gotham and Deepak's public comments always leave me wondering. Particularly Deepak's in the days following MJs death. I sensed frustration, anger, or resentment under the obvious grief. That's understandable when you care about someone and they don't take your advice. Clearly MJ had justifiable reasons to need medication for chronic pain and debilitating insomnia, but what were Deepak's recommendations to MJ? That's what I'm curious to know.
I've read Dick Gregory's account and know MJ was primarily a vegetarian who supplemented with animal protein when working, ate organic, and drank fresh juice. All the talk of him being an "addict" just doesn't fit. There's something else. I can't fathom he was taking all the drugs that has been alleged. Perhaps he rotated, or switched often for maximum effect. And, if he was the sterotypical Virgo, it makes sense he'd have multiple drugs and/or supplements "just in case". LOL It was reported that he wanted off all the meds because he didn't like the way they made him feel. In the property seized during the '93 raid of his home were instructions on how to do a detox from pain meds at home. There are several reports since suggesting he was detoxing, which is necessary when one take drugs on a regular basis, to reset tolerance levels. Detoxing off of psych drugs can cause terrible insomnia. Clearly he didn't use Propofol regularly, only under extreme distress.
So.... what did Deepak recommend?
06:56 PM on 09/05/2009
i agree...Deepak did seem kinda off when i heard him talk about MJ ,i have also heard over the years that MJ was a vegetarian and it dosen't seem right to me either about all the drugs..

but

i suffer from cronic back pain { three surgeries } and i understand about wanting the pain to ease up..with nothing to help but sleep to escape it.......i can about will myself to sleep..i think its my bodys mech. against pain when it gets to severe.
i use pain patches,bio-freese,tens unit,muscle relaxers and pain meds and something for nerves at times too...but mind you i
dont use all of these at once...i fear to o.d....it scares me..dr. gets on me sometimes for not taking something and letting the pain get so intence.said it is better on your body and mind to keep it under control .
after so many have accidentaly gone that way it scares me....
MJ
Heath Ledger
DJ AM
Mss.Monroe
and so many others it is no wonder i have that fear...im not one to think that it cant happen to me so i am extra carefull.
R.I.P....MJ
03:14 AM on 09/06/2009
lol MJ adored Kentucky FRIED chicken.. his comfort food.
01:43 PM on 09/05/2009
Thanks for the nice anecdotes focused on humanizing and not on hyperbole and demagoguery. Much appreciated.
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01:19 PM on 09/05/2009
you chopras really know all the stars. golly gee!

d
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10:06 AM on 09/05/2009
What was the delay-----really, for his burial? He should have been cremated, as was his wish. Maybe it's not too late.
02:01 PM on 09/05/2009
Who knows, honestly. But based on reports, the delay was due to the multiple autopcies, toxicology report, and coroner's investigation.
As for the cremation issue. MJ left a will. Had being cremated been important to him, seems he would have left specific instructions. If he left instructions and they were withheld or destroyed, that's another matter. But, if what happened to his physical body after his spirit left wasn't that important, I can see him leaving it to those who survived him, in this case Katherine. Under the circumstances, I think she made a good choice. His physical remains are safe there and are amongst many that he studied and admired.
And, a full moon night. How fitting for The Thriller.
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04:54 PM on 09/06/2009
Note: G.Chopra's flippantly throwing that little unprovable nugget wasn't necessary; therefore, it along with other little misstatements make me even happier that MJJ did have a family to depend on for long term social support. Thank God Mrs.Jackson schedule the memorial and the burial according to what she thought was best for MJJ memory rather than listening to all these vague references by his goffy FRIENDS. Some of his friends in their attempt to humanize him are really borderlining on victimizing him. Thank God anyone who have any spirituality understanding that Michael body is in Forest Lawn; however, his spirit left hour before Conrad Murray even knew he was deceased. This is why Murray, EMT, Hospital emergency staff couldn't revive MJJ; Essence of MJJ NEVER CAME TO THE HOSPITAL BECAUSE HIS SPIRIT LEFT hours before from the Homby Hill resident and like Heaven and refuse to come back when they were trying to revive him..Memorial and the funeral are part of our cultural rituals because it provide family and friends a final goodbye and a time to reflect on the person's life; much like CREMATION CEREMONY which G Chopra family will one day participate in as their cultural goodbye!
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Solja
12:56 AM on 09/06/2009
The ultimate reason for the delay was finding, and agreeing, on his final resting place. This was after the coroner released his body to the family. Jermaine was one who wanted him buried at Neverland, but others did not. Besides that, it is against the law to bury someone in Cali on private land. Jermaine, who always spoke up for Michael during times when he needed a strong shoulder and a voice, wanted to celebrate his life at Neverland with the doors opened up to his fans, like at Graceland. The mom, I've heard, wanted no parts of that. Besides, after the LAPD raided his home, he declared that he would never go back there again, and he kept that declaration until his death. It would have been wrong to put him there against his wishes so the family had to put him somewhere where his body would be safe. That is what took so long. I'm glad he is now in his final resting place. Now the media can leave him alone.
08:51 AM on 09/05/2009
Thank you for you for the beautiful description of a fascinating person..When I lost a loved one, we had to wait 5 days for a sibling to return from overseas. It was agonizing thinking of him in a cold storage locker. But two and a half months because the family could not "agree"? I can't imagine what that was like for his children. There is a reason for the rituals of various religions and societies, almost all of which call for a fairly quick disposition of the body, ultimately it helps the healing of those left behind.
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10:55 AM on 09/05/2009
The quick disposal of bodies started in ancient times when there were no mortuaries to keep the bodies in freezers. Of course, waiting for relatives was not possible either; traveling wasn't as easy as it is today.

But, you're right. The sooner the funeral is held, the better.