THE BLOG

STOP SITTING ON SANTA'S LAP!

12/16/2005 09:14 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

hey everyone!!! My niece wrote this for her school. i thought it was really interesting and would make a nice post on the huffpo! She's only nine years old, and I think we should all be proud of her!

SANTA SUCKS!!!

Last weekend I did something horrible. Something I shouldn't have done.

I sat on Santa's lap.

To be fair, I was tricked into it. My parents said that if I told Santa what I wanted for Christmas, I would get it. And I wanted a My Little Pony Citrus Sweetheart. It's from the tropical paradise called BUTTERFLY ISLAND. And it comes with its own recognisable scent and sparkly hair. And a brush.
So i got in line and waited my turn. But when I got there, i was shocked.

No one had told me that Santa was an old fat white male.

At that point, I couldn't bring myself to sit down and draw attention to this grotesque, bloated example of US hegemony.

But my parents kept saying, "Sit down Brittney-Mae. Sit down Brittney-Mae."

So I did. But inside, I was crying.

Outside, i was crying too. I'm only nine.

In most situations, I would never sit on the lap of an old white male -- especially one that is wearing red and white. After all, red is the color of the blood of innocent Iraqis. And white is the color of Tookie William's executioners. His boots are black -- like Karl Rove's soul.

Don't get me wrong. I love this country. And anyone who says I don't is a fascist. I just think Amerikkka is responsible for everything wrong that has ever happened in this world.

Like Santa, the US goes to different countries and drops presents on them.

Except these presents are BOMBS.

I refuse to sit on what I believe to be the symbol of what is wrong with the USA. Santa has not provided liberty and justice for all. What did Santa do for the people during Hurrican Katrina? What did Santa do for those innocent people captive in our prisons of torture?

For those people on American's death row, surely there was no candy in their stockings. Only pain. And suffering. Just because you are on death row doesn't mean you can't have a roll of Spongebob stickers or a flashing puffer ball.

The last nine years have provided very little evidence to encourage me that Santa is a good person, and one whose lap I should sit on. If anything , his indifference toward minorities, and the fact that he didn't get me the Dance Maker 2 Mat Electronic Dance Machine last year makes him worse than Hitler.

I believe it's time for all of us to stop sitting on Santa's Lap.

if you do not wish to sit on Santa's lap because of what Santa has done in the name of Amerikkka, then you should join me in STOP SITTING ON SANTA'S LAP by logging onto STOPSITTINGONSANTASLAP.COM.

As long as Santa remains deathly silent on the war in Iraq, and all the wars before that-- as well as AIDS, bird flu, global warming, corrupt electoral processes, religious extremism (only in the US), intolerant attitudes toward gays (including lesbian and transgendered individuals), the death penalty, the irrational war on drugs, SUV's, the U.S. addiction to oil, anti-abortion extremists- then I will never sit on his lap. And neither should you.

but i still want My Little Pony!

: )

PS: hi Emily Weinstein!