WHAT CAUSED STEVE IRWIN'S DEATH? TAKE A GUESS.

It is common knowlege that stingrays are gentle creatures - quick with a smile, always there to lend a helping fin. However, in the matter of Steve Irwin, this was not the case: the loving conservationist was killed by one piercing stab to the heart - by, of all things, a stingray. Although many networks and papers have covered Irwin's death from every possible angle, no one has really asked the most important question of all: Why did the stingray attack him in the first place?

The unspeakable truth: it was the warming waters of the sea that caused the transformation of the stingray's behavior - from its natural, docile mood to the demeanor of a crazed, heartless killer. The warming waters, as you already can guess, were caused by increasing global temperatures - an alarming phenomenon continually ignored by the one person really responsible for all of this: George Bush, our so-called President.

Steve Irwin may be the first death caused by a stingray - but it won't be the last. As sea temperatures increase, thanks to the Bu$h/Cheney cabal, do not be surprised if you see millions of green turtles, starfish, hermit crabs, sea slugs, urchins - plus an odd seahorse or two - rising from the depths to exact revenge on all that is human and at fault for the current state of the world.

Let us hope that they only target the "Repuglicans."