Debate: Do Pets Make Us Happier?

Growing up, my family had a much-beloved dog, Paddy-Wack ("Knick knack paddy wack, give your dog a bone..."), but we don't have a pet now. I'm very thankful that our building doesn't allow them, because the Big Girl would constantly be pestering me about it, if not. I definitely wouldn't want the responsibility of having a pet - we're taxed to the uttermost right now, with two children. We can't even keep a houseplant alive.

Nevertheless, I know that for many people, pets are an enormous source of happiness. The other day, though, I had a fascinating conversation with a friend about the negative happiness consequence of having pets. There are pros and cons I hadn't considered.

The pros to having pets:
Pets (above the fish/turtle level) provide companionship and unconditional love, both of which are key to happiness.

Dog owners, at least, often get more exercise, and exercise is a source of happiness.

Research shows that while we think that receiving support is a key to happiness, actually, providing support is perhaps even more important. Pets require our constant attention and care.

Having a pet contributes to the "atmosphere of growth" because you learn about your pet, learn to take care of it, watch it grow, etc.

Having a pet often contributes to stronger relationships with other people, by giving you something in common and similar concerns. I know many people who have made good friends at the dog-walkers park.

But my friend pointed out some cons:
Pets make it much harder to travel. When I asked him why he couldn't leave his dogs in a kennel for a week, he said, "How often do you leave your two daughters for a week?" Point taken.

For people who have difficulty expressing affection to people, pets can be an outlet. In some cases, this is a bonus, but it can also mean that such folks are less inclined to direct their outward affection toward other people, who need it. Along the same lines, people who aren't terribly social feel less need to be sociable, so they end up spending less time with other people.

Pets generate a huge amount of chores, which can be a source of tension and resentment.

Pets are sometimes used to justify decisions that people don't want to take responsibility for. Instead of saying, "I don't want to go to Thailand" or "I don't want to go to your family's house for Thanksgiving," they say, "We can't leave the dogs."

Obviously, pets are an expense.

Trying to decide whether to get a pet?

In his fascinating book Stumbling on Happiness, Daniel Gilbert argues that people aren't very good at predicting what will make them happier in the future. He suggests a remedy: To predict what's likely to make you happy in the future, ask someone who is having that experience at the moment. The more similar such surrogates are to you, the more helpful their information is likely to be.

So if you love to travel, or if you spend most of your time at home, or if you have a lot of kids or no kids, ask similarly-situated people how they like having a pet.

Gilbert maintains that although we all feel very idiosyncratic, we're much more alike in our preferences than we imagine--so the experience of other people is the best guide to follow.

Lists of pros and cons aside, from my own experience, pet ownership seems a lot like parenthood: As much as people might explain the disadvantages, and as much of a pain as it might be for long stretches, you're never sorry you made the decision. There's a satisfaction there that seems beyond the reach of conventional measure or rational explanation. Why? I think the secret is love. We gladly pay a high, high price for love.

If you'd like to read more about happiness, check out Gretchen's daily blog, The Happiness Project, and join the Happiness Project group on Facebook to swap ideas.

Comments

[arkgrfx61]

My husband and i have a 6 month old springer spaniel puppy, and i guess since we don't have kids yet, she is our pride and joy.
I miss her just as much as if she were a child when we go away.
When I dropped her off to be spayed my heart broke to see her being taken away from me.
Yes we have to walk her, pick up her crap, give her baths...but I wouldn't change it for the world.

[wildflowermaven]

I heard that pets lower your blood pressure. Of course they also raise your blood pressure when they knock things over or shred something. But I wouldn't be without one. It is wise to match the pet to your lifestyle. I would love a dog and a cat, but only have a cat as I travel too much. The cat isn't crazy about being alone, but she can take it for short stretches.

[chaz]

There is only one negative with pets. They die way to early.

[QueenCeleste]

They bring tremendous happiness, companionship, better health, unconditional love, humor, and so much more. I especially love the feeling of adopting a cat (I am fond of both but now have just cats) from a shelter. When I brought my last kitty home he just looked around and around and couldn't believe all the space suddenly at his disposal. He explored everything and then stretched out in a spot of sun. Bliss (for us both). My only complaint is that they don't live long enough. But I suppose that means we are are able to adopt more.

[KevinKSF]

I love both dogs and cats; it"s their owners I"m not to crazy about. Many people have very ill behaved pets and simply ask that the rest of the world get over it. Non-stop barking, sniffing and urinating on everything etc. Pet owners often insist on bringing animals into places like coffee shops, restaurants and stores where they dont belong. My biggest complaint is urban pet owners that insist on having medium and large dogs in tiny apartments. Leaving the animals to become hyper and agitated all day alone. Then finally taking the poor thing out for a 10-minute walk at 8 PM. That"s cruelty in my book. As the economy tanks further the shelters are going to fill with unwanted pets of all kinds. Yes people that get pets are more than a little selfish, when THEY have had enough that"s it the pet is history.

[arkgrfx61]

We have a neighbor who has two dogs and in the 4 years that i've lived in this building i've seen her walk them ONCE! Every time we pass her door they constantly bark and growl (of course they're little yappy dogs)

[kmsbt]

Funny, I feel the same way about kids and their parents. Can I look forward to the kids becoming history?

[OttoMann]

I lot of the cons you cite are really specific to having a dog, as opposed to say, cats. With cats, it's no big deal to go away for a long weekend, but with a dog that's out of the question without making arrangements.

[Henry]

Just imagine if Condi Rice had to manage 5 cats (who do not like each other) on a day to day basis. Think this might give her a little insight to Gaza, the West Bank, Lebanon, Iraq, and Iran? You know cats are wonderful, but they'll drain a lot out of you. They shred the carpet, scratch the furniture, and pee on everything. (you know I just thought we'd have and election and institute "freedom", but it just didn't quite work out according to the textbooks I read)

[Checquoline]

I had a cat for 14 years and in all that time he never once peed out of his box which was cleaned daily. He did not scratch the furnature either. He just wouldn't let me change the bed sheets without trying to catch them and crawling under the bottom sheet. He died from diabetes last year and I still miss him.