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Happiness Myth No. 6: Money Can't Buy Happiness

Posted: 03/12/09 10:51 AM ET

As I've studied happiness over the past few years, I've learned many things that surprised me. Each day for two weeks, I'm debunking one "happiness myth" that I believed before I started my happiness project. For example, I wrote about Myth No. 5: A "Treat" Will Cheer You Up.

Happiness Myth No. 6: Money Can't Buy Happiness.

Well, money can't buy happiness, but it sure can buy lots of things that contribute mightily to happiness.

As the current financial downturn is making vividly clear, money contributes to happiness mostly in the negative; the lack of it brings much more unhappiness than possessing it brings happiness. (Good health is the same way - it's easy to take money or health for granted until you don't have it anymore.) People's biggest worries include financial anxiety, health concerns, job insecurity, and having to do tiring and boring chores. Spent right, money can go a long way to relieving these problems.

Also, if spent wisely, money can help you boost your happiness. For example, philosophers and scientists agree that having strong ties to other people is the KEY to happiness, and money can pay for a plane ticket to visit your sister, a babysitter for a date night with your sweetheart, or pizza and beer for a Super Bowl Party with friends. Novelty and challenge will make you happier, and money can pay for a trip to France, for a drawing class, for a mountain bike.

Is money essential for developing strong ties to other people or finding ways to challenge yourself? Of course not. But money can make it easier. Some of the best things in life aren't free.

Whether rich or poor, people make choices about how they spend money, and those choices can boost happiness or undermine happiness. It's a mistake to assume that money will affect everyone the same way. No statistical average can say how a particular individual would be affected by money--depending on that individual's circumstances and temperament. Three factors shape the significance of money for you:

* It depends on what kind of person you are. You might want to own a horse, or you might want to own a turtle. You might have six children and ailing, dependent parents, or you might have no children and robust parents. You might love to travel or you might prefer to putter around the house.

* It depends on how you spend your money. Some purchases are more likely to contribute to your happiness than others. You might buy cocaine, or you might buy fresh produce. You might splurge on a big-screen TV, or you might splurge by going to a more convenient gym.

* It depends on how much money you have relative to the people around you, and relative to your own experience. One person's fortune is another person's misfortune.

The current economic climate underscores that third aspect of the money/happiness relationship: our happiness is affected by whether we have more or less than we used to have.

My First Splendid Truth holds that "To think about happiness, think about feeling good, feeling bad, and feeling right, in an atmosphere of growth." We're made happier by the feeling that we are learning, growing, seeing change for the better. This applies to the intellectual, spiritual, and emotional parts of our lives - and also, for most people, the financial part.

Feeling like we have less than we did - unless that's the result of a conscious decision - can be a happiness challenge. In one striking study, people were asked whether they'd rather have a job that paid $30,000 in year one, $40,000 in year two, and $50,000 in year three, or a job that paid $60,000, then $50,000 then $40,000. In general, people preferred the first option, with its raises--despite the fact that at the end of the three years, they would have earned only $120,000 instead of $150,000.

Their decision might seem irrational, but in fact, the people who chose the first option understood the importance of growth to happiness. People are very sensitive to relative changes in their condition, for better or worse. (Sidenote: some people feel like they have more with less, so they get a feeling of growth by simplifying their lives.)

If you feel like you're worse off now than you were two years ago, that's an unhappy feeling. Some quick ways to make yourself feel better: count your blessings; distract yourself with something fun or interesting; find ways to assert control over your situation (even to do something as small as to clean out a closet); spend time with friends; or do something to help someone else - you can sign up to be an organ donor right this minute. You'll feel great!

What do you think? How do you think of the relationship between money and happiness? Important, unimportant? I think this is one of the most complex and fascinating subtopics within the subject of happiness.

*
I love a good manifesto, and here's a great one on Scobleizer.

*
If you haven't seen my one-minute movie, The Years Are Short, you might enjoy it.

 
 
 

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As I've studied happiness over the past few years, I've learned many things that surprised me. Each day for two weeks, I'm debunking one "happiness myth" that I believed before I started my happiness ...
As I've studied happiness over the past few years, I've learned many things that surprised me. Each day for two weeks, I'm debunking one "happiness myth" that I believed before I started my happiness ...
 
 
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09:01 AM on 03/14/2009
Money doesn't buy happiness i just makes you comfortable.
11:33 PM on 03/13/2009
Whoever says money can't buy happiness don't know where to shop.
03:37 PM on 03/14/2009
he, he, he...and I know where to shop, darlin'! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjQYsoMADqs
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Vote Obama 2012
10:23 PM on 03/13/2009
Living within your means buys happiness. Living out of debt buys happiness. Those who want more and more will never be satisfied and always be frustrated. Being debt free was the most liberating thing I have ever done for myself!
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07:59 PM on 03/13/2009
People who say money can't buy you happiness probably have money. I know it could buy me happiness. I could pay off my house (not be homeless), I could get rid of all of my debt (then I could afford college) I wouldn't have to worry about losing my family (my horse, 2 dogs, 1 cat, and 2 rabbits and if I had a lot of money I could help many people do the same ( pay off their houses and debt ). So for me money would definitely buy me and a lot of other people happiness. I hope I get to find out before it's to late because I am facing all the things that I mentioned and it is frightening.
04:57 PM on 03/13/2009
i'll admit that financial security is only a part of my overall happiness yet it is the foundation of it. if I can can feed myself, experience my surroundings in a positive manner, put a roof over my head then i'm content to a CERTAIN EXTENT but life is more than these things. everyone whether rich or poor have fleeting moments of happiness and misery... what makes one content can make one miserable or not have an emotional/mental/spiritual reaction to such things. its all relative. and i resent the comment that americans have more than most on this planet and are given everything...and should thus be happy and shut up...there is a small population of americans who enjoy life this way NOT many... . we forget that we are complex beings, for MOST of us, we can have days of happiness while the bills, illness, retirement plans, aging parents linger in the back of our minds each day and night creating that daily tension between happiness and misery.

it is a balancing act and we need to stop commenting here as if everyone's life boils down to a simplistic stew of decisions and desires.. there are people trying damn hard to do better, keep an optimistic view of life but to no avail can't get over and when you sit for a moment to imagine how many people have suffered from the greedy forces behind this economic downturn you have to be just a bit more understanding.
01:49 PM on 03/13/2009
I see many comments extolling the virtues of simplicity as the opposite of greed. I run a small business (just me) and have been able to make enough to cover the basics plus the occasional luxury. My issues concerning wealth have nothing to do with acquisition of stuff or keeping up with the Jonses. It has to do with the fact I have 2 children and a wife that depend on me for our moderate middle class lifestyle. It would take only a small disruption in my ability to make a living to send it all into a tailspin. Money truly does not buy happiness, but the lack of it always causes stress. It's not greed that drives me, it's my sense of responsibility.
01:47 PM on 03/13/2009
And a LOT of money can buy Congress.
12:11 PM on 03/13/2009
Money cant buy happiness, but it can buy;
health care
good education
legal protection (good attorney)
plenty of food
a nice house
utilities (heat in the winter, a/c in the summer)
first class vacations
nice car
nice clothing

and the same for your family.

If you cant find some happiness with that good fortune, you deserve to be miserable.
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08:05 PM on 03/13/2009
You can omit the vacations, change nice car to old car, nice clothes to second hand clothes, keep everything else on the list and I would be ecstatic. I agree a lot of people are never satisfied with what they have and always want more and newer and better.
11:42 AM on 03/13/2009
My grandpa always said, "money can't buy happiness, but I'd sure like to give it a try."
09:43 AM on 03/13/2009
All I know is that if I had to spend my life with someone who believed that money bought them happiness, money or no money, that I couldn't look that person in the face and say that I was happy, with them or with a life with someone who believed that.

I guess I would have a hard time loving anyone for whom greed was anything more than a passing fancy. Perhaps those with means can buy themselves that kind of love. Let's hope so, for the sake of their happiness.
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isis
I, Robot
09:43 AM on 03/13/2009
People with money don't have to live near polluting factory farms and busy roads. People without money do. It is dangerous to be poor.
09:18 AM on 03/13/2009
Maybe money can't buy happiness, but I'd rather be rich and miserable than poor and miserable.
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01:34 AM on 03/15/2009
It is dangerous to be poor, thank you.
09:04 AM on 03/13/2009
I don't know a single unhappy rich person. Of course, I cannot afford to go where they seem to assemble most.
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01:30 AM on 03/15/2009
LOL.
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Passenger57
Keeping Calm And Carrying On...
03:34 AM on 03/13/2009
Able to buy whatever I want = HAPPY
Able to help friends/family = HAPPY
Not having to worry about bills = HAPPY
Able to travel = HAPPY
Not worrying about paying to remedy health problems = HAPPY
"Money can't buy happiness" is right up there with "Looks aren't everything" - whether they're true is highly debatable, but they sure wouldn't hurt to have!
02:53 AM on 03/13/2009
I'm very glad to see this.

The myth that "money can't buy happiness" is so pervasive in our culture that even to point out the obvious problems with this canard invites heated response.

The subtle message in the "money can't buy happiness" myth is that poor people who complain about the exigencies of being poor are simply whiners or aren't trying hard enough. In other words, the poor should know their place and learn to be happy with "the little things."

While it's true that a Porsche is unlikely to make you happier than a Honda in any real sense, it's also plainly true that someone who cannot afford medical insurance or care will constantly worry about getting ill (which is a simple fact of life). Someone who owns their home will fear and worry less than a renter. Someone with lots of money in the bank knows that they can weather life's uncertainties; someone living month to month doesn't know that.

The syrupy platitude that "money can't buy happiness" completely ignores the harsh reality that LACK of money nearly GUARANTEES unhappiness. I'm glad this article points out reality.
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08:08 PM on 03/13/2009
Excellent Post!