A Valentine's Day Turn-Off

Forget the expensive chocolates. Forgo the flowers. This Valentine's Day, defy expectations by doing something so daring your sweetheart will be begging for more. I'm talking about a gesture so wildly romantic and heartfelt, he or she will remember it for years to come. And it doesn't cost a thing. All it takes is switching off the power.

Yes, my fellow CrackBerry-carrying, cell phone toting, text sending friends, it is time to give the people you love a real gift this holiday...your undivided attention. So here's a novel idea: turn it off. Just do it.

I'm not saying we need to be off-line for the entire day. In fact, many romantics will be turning to the web this week to look for amorous recipes, to order gifts or e-cards and of course, to send mushy emails. My friends at Yahoo! conducted a recent V-Day poll and found that 21% of Americans think it's romantic to say, "I love you" via text. That's cute. But what I really want and what I would guess most of my friends desire, is some quality time with my husband - without the usual distractions. I'm going to go out on a limb here and suggest that guys probably feel the same way - even if it is just for a precious hour or two.

Yes, it might sound strange that a multi-tasking mom like myself, whose very business exists in cyberspace, could encourage my fellow tech addicted friends to unplug. But I'm not saying do it forever. What I am suggesting is that we could make a bold statement of love and affection by taking our eyes off that smart phone while sitting down for a romantic evening and actually gazing into our beloved's eyes instead of the usual darting downward every three seconds to check email...Or how about putting the family laptop aside or letting your cell go to voicemail while coloring valentines with the kids?

Being in constant contact has become so ingrained in our daily lives, that it is hard to break away. Believe me, I feel your pain. Before I had children, while I was still working as a news reporter, my husband nicknamed me "Crack" for my inability to switch the damn thing off. And now, as a mom in pursuit of wellness, I think a lot about how managing technology in our lives has become a very daunting challenge, especially because the Internet and mobile technology have given way to so many new opportunities for flexible work schedules. In countless ways, e-mail, voicemail, instant messaging, etc. make it possible for a lot of people to juggle professional and personal commitments. But we cannot lose sight that even such liberating and time-saving innovations can tip the work-life balance away from the priorities we set in the first place. That's the reason a Canadian government ministry recently directed its employees to observe a BlackBerry blackout from 7pm to 7am AND on weekends and holidays. Now that is a cool idea.

So how about implementing our own blackout this Valentine's Day? Let it be a tiny step towards disentangling ourselves from the electronic devices that rule our lives. Whether it is your sweetheart, children, parents or anyone else you really care about, show them the love by really listening and engaging without all of those ringing, blinking, buzzing interruptions. And I don't mean set the phone on mute. Really turn it off. You can see what you missed after the candlelit dinner. Whatever the message, can it really be more important than spending quality time with your special someone?

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Click here for more Huffington Post Valentine's Day coverage.

Comments

[KindAndThoughtful]

Thanks for the post.

I find that the best gifts are simple, inexpensive and sincere...­that come from the heart.

[nitpicker]

Forget it. Valentines day is a false holiday foisted on the public by the card companies. That anyone regards it as a "womans right" day is nut, nut, nuterrinko. Why not a national tool day. Get me a table saw or I'm going to pout. Trouble is that too many guys wouldn't know what to do with one if it was given. Ho hum, except for an outward display of oneupsmanship, as if a woman knew what to do with a 18K bracelet or and diamonds. (Did you know by the way that diamonds are not rare and that quality gems in the 1/2 -3 carat range --if in a real and free market would cost about $40 a carat, cut and polished.) Long live DeBeers the best bluff in modern history. Anyway, I love my wife, but if she doen't get it 364 other days of te year, Feb 14 won't make a difference.

[ConcernedAboutRFuture]

Very good post nitpicker! My husband spent I don't even KNOW how much on roses last year to be delivered home... it took a while of calming myself down not to smack him in the head when he arrived home. I smiled and thanked him. He must have missed the dozen times I stated that I hate roses....w­hat's worse... I hate red roses.... the ultimate symbol of guilt and/or 'I didn't know what to get you so I got what TV commercials tell me to get you.' A false holiday indeed.

What I did want was for him to help me with the baby or chores on weekends while his head was stuck in the TV watching college football, or baseball..­.or Sundays...­. the NFL. Yes, I do love football as well... but it should take away from the quality of life or a marriage.

Instead of turning off the phone, how about turning off the TV?

[ConcernedAboutRFuture]

I meant to say...."it should NOT take away from the quality of life...."