Patty* called me frustrated and dejected. She constantly compared herself to others all the while steadily resisting the signs (like getting sick, having no energy and feeling unhappy) that were trying to redirect her out of her business, into her creativity and into her sacred feminine.
I reminded Patty that her resistance wasn't entirely a bad thing.
It was merely an indication that she was really, really close to having what she desired -- and possibly in a form that she never even imagined possible for herself. Sometimes the thought of having what we have longed for, for so long or embarking on a new, unknowable journey is terrifying. Like, absolutely devastatingly frightening to our mind and to our conditioning that says it's not possible to radically alter our life, leave or start a relationship, leave or start a business or romance ourselves every day simply because we deserve it.
As human beings we often have unconscious beliefs, fears and traumas still running active in our body-mind-spirit. So, sometimes we're going to resist. We'll come up with any and every excuse to not go down that road. We'll pay healers, coaches and therapists to make it better (and while they facilitate powerful healing, it is up to us as individuals to do the work to allow this healing to occur), and then get angry in the face of the guidance we receive.
I can say all of this with strong conviction because let me tell you, I know this road well. And I feel so honored that when clients like Patty come to me with any or all of the above, I can share from a place of having walked (and still walking!) that path right alongside them.
In fact, I've actually observed and identified my basic resistance process:
1.) I receive guidance or have a life experience that requires me to go outside of my comfort zone in some way.
2.) I then spend two-to-three weeks with my mind battling out all of the reasons said expansion is too much, too scary, too premature.
3.) Then, timidly I begin telling those close to me about this next thing I'm going to do/be/have. The resistance softens as I own it as my reality more and more.
4.) By week four to five, I'm in acceptance! But it sure would be a lot easier to not have to go through that process at all. Right?!
Can you identify your basic resistance process? How do you respond when you receive guidance or have life experiences that don't feel comfortable to you? It's helpful to raise your awareness and notice the next time you're in resistance. Because then, you are in a powerful place. A place to shift your resistance into thriving.
Below are some of my tried-and-true ways to move out of resistance and into our natural state of thriving:
• Dance. Nothing shifts your vibration like shaking it. Right now I've got "Royals" by Lorde on repeat to shake and shift my vibration whenever needed.
• Take a 20-minute cat nap. Sleep is the ultimate reset.
• Tap cortices. Visualize balancing the left and right hemispheres of your brain as you do this. Really got yourself in a tizzy? Tap multiple times in a row, slowly, while taking deep breaths.
• Meditate. As little as five minutes of sitting in meditation can shift your whole vibration. If you prefer guided meditations, I highly recommend Getting Into the The Vortex by Esther Hicks.
• Go for a walk. Outside. As you walk connect with the greenery around you, imagine green light emanating from your chest to support your fourth chakra of self-love and love of others. In the desert or a less-than-green environment? Imagine an orange ball of light in your pelvis growing brighter to activate your second chakra (how you relate to everything outside of you -- money, sex, power, people).
• Laugh. Pull up NetFlix comedy videos, call up your funniest friend, watch your favorite laugh-out loud movie (for me, that's "Baby Mama").
• Listen to teachers and authors you respect who inspire you. Michael Bernard Beckwith and Abraham-Hicks do it for me. Pull them up on Hay House Radio or YouTube for an insta-vibration lift.
• Self-pleasure. Slowly and without attachment to outcome. In fact, light some candles, turn on some music and enjoy being present with your body. It's just like a meditation.
• Recite a mantra that soothes you. Some examples to get your started:
"Everything is always working out for me."
"I am balanced, harmonious and peaceful."
"I follow the flow of my life."
"I am on my way to thriving!"
A great way to get ahead of resistance before it shows up is to take this list and add your own joyful, high-vibing activities that shift your vibration. Then whenever you notice yourself resisting what is, you can saunter (or plod, depending on your mood) over to your resistance shifting cheat sheet and begin going down the list applying these practices until you feel your natural state of thriving return.
Ultimately, know that as cliché as it sounds -- this too shall pass. Your resistance won't last forever. With intention and an empowered attitude, you can experience a life that truly thrives.
What are your favorite ways to release resistance? Leave your comments below.
*Not her real name.
And for those of you that run your own business, you also deserve to experience a business that thrives. Check out my Run a Spirit-Led Business (& Thrive!) online course for more details.
For more by Heather Strang, click here.
For more on emotional wellness, click here.