Caring For My Kids' Hair

Having four children, with one having straight hair and three curly, it's a bit of a new world for me. Growing up with straight hair myself, that was all I really knew how to work with. It was pretty straightforward: wash, air dry, done.

Henry, Johan and Lou -- my three youngest -- have super beautiful locks. Their hair definitely requires a different kind of care than my daughter Leni's hair. I've learned to never brush their curly hair when it's dry because then it'll frizz. I use lots of conditioner and detangler, and only go to hairdressers who really KNOW how to cut and style curly hair.

I've let my boys' hair grow really really long, and just recently they asked me to cut off their beautiful hair! It was funny because it was definitely harder for ME in some ways, as I absolutely love their hair! I'm their Mom -- I've been the one to carefully brush and help them care for it all these years, but I do want them to be who they want to be. I think that's really important, to allow kids to express themselves -- everything from the way they dress to how they want their hair. And now, that meant short.

And of course, it was not just simple short! They wanted mohawks with special designs to them, so I asked Lamar Odom who did his cool star-design buzz, and then contacted his stylist. He gave my kids these buzz cuts with amazing individual designs... great for the summer because they're COOL, in both senses of the word!

 

Comments

[Eloise Fuller Putnam]

08:04 PM on 08/22/2011

Thank you for sharing your experience. I wanted to share with you some knowledge that I think will be very valuable to you. Please read the articles posted at http://www.blackhairscience.com/forum/

A wonderful woman, (Audrey Sivasothy) with degree in science from Rice University has put together a wonderful resource of information regarding african american or textured hair care. She really knows her stuff. She has also written a book. https://www.facebook.com/BlackHair101
I think she's amazing. I'm not trying to sell anything. I don't know her personally. I will not gain anything from sharing this with you.

[youngblood]

04:53 PM on 08/10/2011

As soon as I get off the floor from laughing from her actually describing herself as an actress I want to ask why this article is even on HP?!!!!

[astroup123]

10:59 PM on 08/07/2011

Hair seems like it should be so unimportant but goshdarnit....it is. I'll never forget the time my teenage son's friend, carlos, wanted me to put his hair in a pony tail. The closest thing I could compare it to is a horse's tail. I went over and got my calipers (I was an inspector at the time) and measured 1 single hair. Hist was .008in. Mine measured between .0001 and .000. My digital calipers actually registered my hair thickness at zero. I just ordered some hairlocs and should have them in by the end of this month. It will be the first time in my life that I will have hair that doesn't look like 2 year old toddler's hair.

[Willow712]

10:41 PM on 08/07/2011

I am a nurse in long term care. We had two new AA CNA men that just started with us. and I asked them to give a Caucasian woman a good bath and wash her hair before they went off shift. Well, the woman didn't look any better all day long. Finally they were getting ready to leave and I asked why this woman had not gotten her bath and shampoo before they left. One of them said, "Well, we did give her a good bath, we shampooed her hair really well, used a lot of vaseline in her hair........." LOL. No wonder she looked quite frumpy and oily. I started laughing and the CNA looked at me and said, "you white people do put vaseline in your hair, don't you?" LOL. He didn't believe me when i said that we didn't. It was so funny and such an obvious learning experience for these two young men.

[yltnelis]

06:18 PM on 08/21/2011

Is this a serious comment? I am Black and I have never in my life put vaseline in my hair. Maybe this is standard practice for some AA men since lots of guys keep their hair cut really short, so I guess it can't do too much damage. But I can't imagine a woman of any ethnicity putting vaseline in her hair. Most women I know run away from hair products that even have petroleum jelly listed as an ingredient, and vaseline is nothing but 100% petroleum jelly.

[Lili Q]

08:54 PM on 08/31/2011

Illegal aliens from Mexico often use lard because its cheap, but it does tend to run off the head in the heat

[The JillyBean]

09:35 PM on 08/07/2011

"and only go to hairdressers who really KNOW how to cut and style curly hair. "

I'm in my thirties and still looking for one who can cut the 1/2 black hair. It's definitely a sherpa worthy trek to find one. Being not completely kinky african or straight hair, no one on either side seems competent enough to give me a cut that doesn't look lopsided once I get home and wash it the next day.

[Calebsgm]

08:28 PM on 08/07/2011

I two bi-racial children. My son has looser curly hair, which he just keeps short enough to be wavy. My daughter has the super curly and super thick hair. When she was young, I always knew black women who would braid it for her. I am super clumsy with my hand and could never get the hang of it. As my daughter got older, she would get it chemically straighten occasionally, and hot combed enough to make semi-straight. Now as an adult she has come up with a hair style that works for her. She twists her hair in sections, which makes it almost look like she has dreads. Then after a few days, she loosens the twists and it turns into soft curls/waves.

[HawaiiShira]

07:09 PM on 08/07/2011

Having biracial nieces, nephews & cousins, hair has always been an issue. Here's a perspective from my cousin, Mara Gay, that gives her perspective.

http://www.theroot.com/views/ugly-green-monster

[madHenry]

08:36 PM on 08/07/2011

I hate to nitpick (though I don't think I am), but may I suggest you (and everyone else of good will and good sense) try to refrain from using the word "biracial." It implies two "races," with the further implication that one "race" is better, more human than the other "race." I think "having nieces, nephews & cousins of may colors and with different types of hair..." works better. But maybe that's just me.

[HawaiiShira]

09:07 PM on 08/07/2011

Okay, I have nieces, nephews & cousins that include African-American, Caucasian, & Korean ancestry.....is that better?

[Ife Oshun]

10:35 PM on 08/29/2011

How on earth does the term "biracial" imply one race is superior over another??

[Eboni McCollum]

05:26 PM on 08/07/2011

I do not think the above poster meant the quoted text in the way that you took it. If you read the sentence following the one you quoted, it's apparent that she was simply saying that we weren't born knowing how to handle our different textures, curls, and spirals. We had to learn just like any other race with curly hair. Honestly, "black" people are more likely to just do eveything you stated above, usually beginning with some form of hair straightening, so we rarely work with our hair in it's natural form. Altering the hair is not the same thing as styling/wearing it in its natural state. Women who've "gone natural"'could tell you that.

[Tara Thomas]

05:04 PM on 08/07/2011

Brush and curly hair ...... no ... no ... no

[chiara0]

04:13 PM on 08/07/2011

Awww this is a sweet article.

[madHenry]

08:37 PM on 08/07/2011

Yes it is. Seal's a lucky, lucky, lucky man.

[Ife Oshun]

10:36 PM on 08/29/2011

Heidi is a very lucky woman, too. I love this couple. God bless them!

[no exit]

03:07 PM on 08/07/2011

I've got naturally curly hair and one of the first things I learned was never BRUSH my hair when it's wet. In fact it's best not to brush hair, any hair, at all, ever.

I run a wide-tooth comb through it once and then let it air dry (hair dryers are out too). Once I got over my "straight hair" obsession, I discovered that my hair looked pretty okay curly (this of course was after I discovered I didn't need to look like I was stamped out with a cookie cutter. Plus it's easier to take care of and way easier to cut.

[iamatraveler]

02:21 PM on 08/07/2011

Thank you, Heidi, for sharing your kids' hair story. I too have naturally curly hair. Contrary to what some may think, most Black women do not know how to maintain and care for curly hair. I am the oldest of eight children; six girls and two boys. Growing up my mother did not know how to manage my curly hair, and neither did any of the other women in my life. After years of straightening my hair with a hot comb, my step-mother chemically relaxed my hair when I was ten. In my late 20s, I decided to cut off all my long (down to my shoulder blades) locks and grow my hair natural (sans chemicals). I love my natural hair and will never straighten it again. A good website that helped me in my transition is www.naturallycurly.com. I love their Curltalk discussion boards and they even have a section for parents. By the way, most black people (in the United States) do have curly hair; loosely and tightly curled, coiled and with zigzags.

[camanokat]

12:53 PM on 08/07/2011

Where's the photos of the new 'do's?

[Emma Peel2060]

12:15 PM on 08/07/2011

There's a great collection of products called 'Mixed Chicks' that could detangle Brillo. I highly recommend it to anyone w/ curly hair.

[peacefulgrrl]

09:46 PM on 08/07/2011

I've been using 'Mixed Chicks' products and find they are great for all types of curly hair. They also have kid products!

[Trickery]

11:37 AM on 08/07/2011

The boys shouldn't be a problem at all. Just keep their hair clean and cut, then send them out to play.