Why are we so often unhappy and unfulfilled? Why do we get into the wrong relationships, take the wrong jobs, and make the wrong choices? Why is outstanding leadership, managing change, and success so elusive?
The answers and the solutions to these everyday plights are revealed by today's "scientists of the mind," evolutionary psychologists who have discovered stunning new lessons about the power of instincts and their capacity to transform lives from merely surviving to actually thriving in every area of life.
Indeed, I am sure that you have heard the familiar saying, "Animals are ruled by instinct and man is ruled by reason," and that is why man is more evolved than animals. Well, forget it!
My studies over the last decade indicate the exact opposite: man is more evolved than animals because we have more instincts, not less. The fact is, your instincts, or to be more exact, your instinctual tools only exist because they have been working for millions of years otherwise -- according to the scientific irrefutable process of natural selection -- they would not exist.
Mother Nature has provided you with these tools to help you solve adaptive problems -- problems that every member of every generation must solve if it is going to survive, let alone thrive. For example, just as your ancestors had to find an empowering environment so they could grow, so do you and so will your grandchildren's grandchildren.
Unfortunately, in these modern times, most of us are disconnected from our basic instincts and all too often cautiously rely on our rational mind to cope with life's challenges. We make all the wrong moves, all the wrong choices and the results are self defeating. We've foolishly numbed ourselves to the more essential human trait. Instinctual disconnection spells disaster at home and at work.
What are these instinctual tools that help us thrive? Here is a list of your natural tools for success and the function of each:
1. Shelter Seeking instincts...helps you find an empowering environment/relationship/job so you can grow
2. Care Soliciting instincts ...helps you protect your vulnerabilities
3. Care Giving instincts... helps you develop the future
4. Beauty instincts...helps you make yourself desirable to others
5. Cooperative instincts...helps you get people to work together
6. Curiosity instincts... helps you stay ahead of the pack
These six instincts are your natural tools for success, and there is no doubt -- as will be evidenced by your own observations and experiences -- that those individuals who can use these instinctual tools in broad ways will clearly be the most successful individuals.
In the next few weeks, I will be doing a series of articles that will explain exactly how you can reconnect with these hard-wired behaviors and how to strategically use the genius of your instinctual tools so you can thrive personally and professionally. Here is a preview:
Personal: The genius of your instincts will help you lose weight, accelerate your learning, become more appealing to others, protect your vulnerabilities, empower your relationships, break free from destructive relationships and dead end jobs, get others to be more interested in you, empower your relationships, find the right job and the right partner.
Work: The genius of your instincts will help you become a more effective manger, retain key talent, attract new clients and customers, create an inspirational learning environment, resolve and reduce interdepartmental conflicts, enhance performance appraisal effectiveness, develop more effective leaders
Marriage: The genius of your instincts will help you reduce marital discord, make yourself a more attractive mate, add spark to your sex life, enhance your partner"s health, and have more fun.
Parenting: The genius of your instincts will help you enable your son or daughter select the right college, stimulate your children's interest and creativity, and create stronger bonds with your children.
With these and many other examples, you will be enlightened to see that your instincts are from dark and uncivilized. Quite the contrary--they are the ultimate life enhancers. Reconnect with them, listen to them, let their natural forces guide you to a more authentic and vibrant life.