THE BLOG

The Unpredictability of Life

06/30/2015 03:25 pm ET | Updated Jun 27, 2016

Life is so unpredictable at times.

One minute everything is going exactly as planned and then out of the blue, your whole world crashes down. All it takes is a flick of a button and your world is turned upside down. You never know what sort of event will happen.

Maybe you're the sort of person who takes one step at a time and could care less what happens next or you're like me who needs to know what's ahead. I hate not knowing what will happen 10 years from now. Will I be successful? Will I be married? Will I have kids? Will I be happy? Will I have plenty of friends and family by my side? The questions constantly eat at me and make me wonder what life will look like.

Death often haunts me and I often think about how I'll take the death of a loved one. It's frightening to think one day my parents simply not being around. How will I cope? Will I continue to live without them? In terms of my boyfriend, if we do in fact get married, how will I handle this death? I know how I'd feel right now: completely and utterly distraught. At this point, I couldn't go on without him by my side.

You see, there are those who are independent and ones who are independent. I'd definitely consider myself dependent. I don't believe I could make it on my own. I often seek advice from others, so if I ever lost that, I have no idea what I would do. I usually ask others their opinion and base mine on theirs. It's a terrible tactic, but it's the solid truth. But, in a blink of an eye, life will throw you a curve ball that makes you make a decision then and there. Is there ever a right or wrong decision?

Well, if I decided not to go to the store this morning, my sister might not have gotten into a car accident. Or, if I hadn't pressured my best friend into coming to my recital, she wouldn't have been hit by a bus. In these circumstances, you have no clue what their destiny truly would have been. You'll always have to wonder "what could have been." And, that's what I don't like about life.

But, I suppose I'll just have to see where the waves take me.