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Inga Batur Headshot

Royals Tour New Zealand and Ruin Family Travel for All of Us

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I first need to point out that I don't usually do this -- dish on royals or celebs. It's fine to make fun of myself and my family, well they've kind of signed up for it, but how can I judge people I don't even know. OK, so I do love my daily dose of gossip but to bring it here?

But dear Kate, Wills and especially you, you little, cute after more than 20 hours of flight, royal baby, you all ventured onto my territory. So, sorry but you kind of asked for it. Because you have literally, single handedly ruined travel for all the families to come. No, nobody can pull it off the way you did it. You've set the standard so high, not even most of the celebs can follow suit. You made it look so effortless, when in fact it's hard work.

Honestly, it's not like I expected Kate to stumble out of the plane, inebriated because she had to endure the insanely long flight and had no other option than to keep drinking to dull her senses, as she had to listen to the nanny struggle to calm little George. Or Wills silently (because hey, he's been suppressing his emotions since he was an embryo), cursing granny for making him do this. I mean, did she forget how it is to travel with kids, oh, but right she left them at home and went on a tour for the six months. Yet, here he is, he knew it was coming, he just couldn't believe he would actually have to pull it off. Till the plane took of the runway, he had his fingers crossed since he could be called onto some rescue mission, where are those suckers, when one needs them.

No, I am not that mean, but couldn't they have looked at least normal? Sure they have blue blood running through your veins, well not you Kate, you brought a hairdresser along. Let me just admit, that no hairdresser could have helped me after my more than eight hour flight with hubs and two kids, there was almost no hair to work with. Still, I am curious what went on on that plane. I dare not speculate. But I can tell you right now, nobody had to try changing diapers to a wiggling child, in the smallest space possible -- namely the airplane toilet, while a huge lady keeps rushing you to hurry, by constantly knocking to check if you're done already, because her bladder has seen better days. And with the nanny on board, Wills and Kate probably did have a chance to catch up on all the new releases, while definitely not trying to decipher what food they were being served. That was probably followed by a nap and then getting ready to look awesome when they get off the plane.

Seriously though, did they do it all on purpose? Just to show the rest of us how it should be done? Because every new parent will tell you, the first trip they took their kid to, was somewhere close by, possibly with too many stuff to fit onto a plane thus taking a car and making regular stops while fussing over everything like only a first time Mom can pull off. But it's not like Wills and Kate had to travel coach with the rest of the losers. I didn't see Ryanair sign on their plane, so packing up the nursery and half their mansion might not have been such a problem. Besides it's not like they will be staying in some cheap hotels, afraid to put baby George on the floor. He'll probably get more than his share of toys to play with.

How are we supposed to think of them as one of us, when for their first trip they set the bar so high not even they can come close to reaching it again? Picking a place that requires them to be stuck on a plane for more than 20 hours, that's bravery. And adding the huge time difference is probably the only reason the little prince looked so serene holding on to his Mom. I think my kids would look that happy and peaceful only if I tried sedating them or bribery, well certainly some serious negotiations would have to take place for us to come to an agreement. But I am stuck wondering why they forgot to put some decent pants on the baby. Kate is wearing the awesome, I'd love to get my hands on it too coat, William is in a suit, yet baby George looks as if he's about to hit the beach despite the wind and drops of rain.

I hope my ramblings made you feel a tad bit better and a little less under pressure but before I am done I'd kindly ask you to seriously lower your expectations before boarding a plane and just be happy to be going away. That's the most we mere mortals can hope for.

This post was previously published on coolkidzcooltrips.com.