Edited highlights of the more than 24,000 pages of Sarah Palin emails have been released in book form as a gripping, three-volume epic, and Peter Jackson, the auteur behind The Lord of the Rings and the upcoming The Hobbit has been tapped to direct the trilogy of films based on the former Governor of Alaska's electronic correspondence.
"When it comes to painstakingly faithful adaptations of material already beloved by millions of rabid fans, Jackson is the go-to guy," said a publicist in a statement made over the weekend. "There is certainly nobody else Sarah would allow to bring the often excruciatingly uninteresting minutiae of her life to the screen."
"And it's great, too," said one unidentified Palin staffer, "because that last Lord of the Rings installment had, like, nine endings, and Sarah's life as Governor of Alaska could really benefit from that feeling that it should have wrapped up way before it actually did."
The book trilogy is entitled A Nod's As Good as a Wink, and the three individual books are called The Fellowship of the Veep, The Troopergate Towers and The Return of the Moose.
According to sources close to Jackson, he also believes that scenes of aerial wolf hunting will make for some "kick-ass CGI."
It is unlikely that Tina Fey will be considered by the Palin camp to play the former governor in the films. This is leading to some speculation that Palin herself will play the lead. There again, says one Hollywood insider, "Peter Jackson's expertise in directing actors who represent an imaginary alternate universe could come in very handy."
Viggo Mortensen could not be reached for comment.
James Napoli is an author and humorist. More of his comedy content for the web can be found here.