Top 10 Reasons Why I (Lovingly) Ripped Off "I'm On a Boat" (VIDEO)

08/25/2009 11:30 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Really, the reason I did it is because I wrote some really funny lyrics one day and couldn't just let them collect dust. But here are some other reasons why I did "I'm On a Date."

10. The world needs another white rapper.

9. The look of fear on the faces of my family and friends when I told them I was doing a rap video. And rapping in it.

8. Any excuse to wear pretty, pretty dresses.

7. Plans for an all-lady live version of Incredibad entitled "Incredibad LIVE - With Titties" never materialized.

6. I've always wondered what a real date is like and I think I nailed it.

5. Jorm needed revenge after "I'm On a Boat." He got it in the form of my friend Pete.

4. Any excuse to say "fuck-me heels."

3. Because I was successful in turning my love for Europe into song lyrics and I wasn't wasting the opportunity.

2. I've always wondered what happens when one's car is towed in Brooklyn. (A retroactive reason.)

1. Because unless The Lonely Island wants to make me their Fergie, I will never, ever get the chance to do anything like this ever again. Ever.

I just adore The Lonely Island, and I hope, if they see this, they find my offering to be faithful to their original. Or at least better than "Daiquiri Girl."

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