Moon Over Suburbia

The story rocking my little town in suburban New York is that of a senior at our high school's graduation ceremony who marked the occasion by mooning the audience. This act would have been news enough, but then the principal -- a fine and dedicated public servant known to me -- revoked the young man's diploma and summoned the police, who arrested the lunar exhibitionist and charged him with disorderly conduct and exposure to a person.

Well, surely we do not wish the pillars of our community to turn into overboiled spaghetini at the first flash of goofballiness in the first degree. Still, is this really a matter for the criminal justice system? Do we really need to insert the long arm of the law into a case that already has such a vivid anatomical presence?

I say nay. For one thing, the boy has lost his diploma. He also faces life with a family, which, if it is like most families, can be counted on to bring this up, bring this up, bring this up, at sensitive moments for decades to come. His classmates and townsfolk will now remember him for this singular moment, but also, thanks to the miracle of youtube, every gimlet-eyed college administrator, every suspicious prospective father-in-law, every skeptical potential employer, every miserly bank loan officer, and every conscientious State Department Terrorist Watch List administrator will see him coming, and not face first. The reality is that this kid could cure cancer and win the Nobel Peace Prize, and the reference to this moment of glory might not get bumped out of the opening paragraph of his obituary. In that light, a criminal conviction seems rather like gilding the lily. Or the rose.

But more to the point, it should not be wasted on anyone that this little escapade took place within hours of the death of George Carlin, whose, shall we say bottomless rebelliousness not only brought joy and laughter to millions, but was a provocative and altogether useful counterweight to authority of every stripe. The event also fell less than a fortnight before our annual celebration of Independence Day, the achievement of which was accomplished not only through the efforts of men of marble whose faces now grace our money, but also through innumerable pranksters, rascals, rogues -- all right, asses -- but sons of liberty all, who cared less for three branches of government and the separation of powers than they did for just sticking it to the king.

Discipline, obedience, respect for authority -- these are all valuable attributes to be taught to the young. But the spirit of rebellion, as exhibited by this youthful cheeky valediction, should not be so harshly squelched.

Comments

[wolfgangmo]

IF this kid is smart, and he may be either very smart or very dumb, then he will realize that he has completed the course work and that the principal has offered him a life lesson. To wit, he can write about this experience in his entrance exam to harvard or oxford and show how it makes him someone who is able to think outside the small box provided for his mind. Or he can sue the school district. The possibilities are only as limited as his imagination. The fact is that the principal can withhold the diploma but not the coursework.

This shouldn't slow this boy down at all.

The principal however is likely a control freak who does not recognize that he has no control.

[jeskiley]

Are you trying to say George Carlin's ghost may have been enjoying one last hurrah before he entered the pearly gates? I'd believe it, but then, I've got an on-line reputation to protect.

[mbaty]

Oh my gods, it's a wardrobe malfunction! Jesus, when will we be done with puritanical standards of being based on fear of the body? When will we finally get our priorities straight? This is a travesty just below the "Don't taze me bro" incident, when a student was shot with electricity for daring to ask a tough political question. This is so ass-backwards.

[ShawnMichel]

If we squelch it at all.

His act of rebellion wasn't really one, after all; more symbolic than anything, and weak, and played. He mooned his indoctrination--not education; children are not educated, but made to be cattle, just like his classmates, just like you, the person reading this--and that should be applauded, and I'm sure will be, by all true Rebels of this world.

Good for him.

Now on to destroy corporate America!

[MomAnon]

Cut that poor kid some slack!
I'd understand it if the principal reined in the young man and made him attend a couple of weeks of summer school to get his diploma -- you do the 'crime,' you do the time. But to revoke his diploma and call the police? It's a sad day when a juvenile prank that harms no one results in something so severe.
All of you out there who have ever mooned anyone, or done something equally goofy, irreverent, and harmless -- speak up in defense of this kid! He didn't hurt anyone. Besides, commencements are incredibly boring. It was probably the highlight of the event, if my graduation was typical!
Ugh. Five-year-olds being accused of "sexual harassment," kids being thrown out of school for forgetting to leave their pocketknives at home, students being expelled for taking an Advil when they have a headache... It's all ridiculous, and "zero tolerance" is a recipe for disaster. Context matters, and so does the outcome.