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Getting Back into the Dating Game: Life After Divorce

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Life after divorce can be overwhelming for the average divorcee. Some become serial daters for a few years followed by a committed, long-term relationship. Others jump out of the frying pan and into the flame by walking down the aisle right away. My piece of advice is plain and simple: get out there. As simple as it may seem, many men and women do not know where to start. Men and woman begin this process differently.

Women: You need to piece yourself back together! Anything you let fall apart when you were married, mend it. Love yourself again for who you are. Once you begin to love yourself again, men will follow suit. If you exude confidence, you can attract any type of man you want. The biggest turn on is confidence.

Men: Be a typical guy, jump into bed with all the girls you meet and get it out of your system. Falling into "lust" is not going to find you a wife. Once you've "sown your oats" then you should be ready for a committed relationship. Be aware there will be a band-aid and she will unfortunately be the one to get hurt. Soon after that, you will be ready to seriously start dating. Eventually, you will find her -- when the timing is right.

You may be asking yourself, so how exactly do you suggest I put myself out there? Putting yourself out there can be as easy as widening your interests or finally doing that one thing you have always wanted to do but never had the chance. Join a club or a new gym. If you do this, you're bound to meet people -- even if it's just friends. By making friends, you meet their friends and consequently you are continually widening your circle, which can eventually lead to finding "the one." If you are still a bit shell-shocked or shy, the best thing you can do is try online dating.

Online dating allows you to be the person you want to be. The screen allows you to say -- or type -- the things that you may be scared to say in person. It allows you to bring out the real you, without any insecurities holding you back. Online dating allows you to sit in the comfort of your home, in your pajamas, eating ice cream, while getting to know new people. Best of all, you're putting yourself out there.

Rip off the band-aid that is holding you back and take a leap of faith. Put yourself back together, exude confidence and try something new -- whether it's signing up for an online dating service or asking out that person you've been eyeing. Life is about timing; when it's right it will happen and you will find the right person.