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Jean-Paul Bedard
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Jean-Paul Bedard lives with his wife in Toronto, where he teaches English. In addition to being an avid long distance runner, Jean-Paul is an advocate helping other survivors of childhood sexual abuse find their "voice". You can follow his journey at breathethroughthis.com.

Entries by Jean-Paul Bedard

Hairballs, Happiness and Mantras

(0) Comments | Posted September 18, 2014 | 11:14 AM

There are days when you feel like you're a majestic Siamese cat prancing around in a beautiful shiny coat, and there are others that leave you feeling like a coughed-up hairball lying on the edge of the carpet. No doubt about it -- life can be messy, and it can...

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Uprooted, Unsettled and Unbridled

(0) Comments | Posted September 15, 2014 | 2:49 PM

I am not depressed! What I am is angry, frustrated, and weary -- This is the refrain I've been saying far too often this past week as more and more people close to me are commenting on the fact that I am "withdrawing" and being "quiet." I'm reminded of that...

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In the Company of Words and Strangers

(0) Comments | Posted September 5, 2014 | 3:13 PM

Words have always had the magic of alchemy in my life. They captivated me as a child sitting in a circle on the floor at our teacher's feet as we sat entranced by the ominous fear of a Brothers Grimm fairy tale. And later, while studying poetry in university, I...

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Falling Apart and Staring Blankly

(0) Comments | Posted August 25, 2014 | 4:16 PM

I like to think of myself as an empathetic person, and that probably has a lot to do with my having to close myself off to people for so long as a coping strategy to get through daily interactions as a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. I've recently returned from...

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Where Beauty Is Found

(0) Comments | Posted August 19, 2014 | 4:38 PM

As a long distance runner, I often get asked why I run so much and what goes through my mind when I'm running for three or more hours. Throughout the years, running has meant many different things to me. It's been an escape from my problems, a way to empty...

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It's Ugly, But We Need Your Help

(2) Comments | Posted August 12, 2014 | 5:06 PM

I woke up today in a sea emotions as the realization that the genius of Robin Williams has left us. As a recovering addict and someone who has struggled with the depths of depression, the news of another celebrity's death leaves me feeling both terrified and furious. Until you've waded...

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5 Essential Life Hacks

(8) Comments | Posted August 11, 2014 | 8:32 AM

Earlier this week I felt as though my life was imploding and that no matter how hard I tried, I could not keep my head above wave after wave of self-doubt crashing towards me. Fortunately, I live a very "public" life on social media, and I've become somewhat of a...

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The Art of Coming Completely Undone

(2) Comments | Posted July 31, 2014 | 12:06 PM

I'm sure you've been in a room full of people when someone brings up the topic of cancer. You may have noticed the word "cancer" is whispered, said almost under the breath. It's a frightening word that no one likes to talk about. It's something we choose not to think...

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Notes From the Margins

(1) Comments | Posted July 29, 2014 | 4:35 PM

One of my fondest childhood memories is munching on Ritz crackers while lying stretched out on the marigold shag carpet in my friend's living room as we eagerly awaited the reruns of Batman and Mission Impossible. To this day, I still hold my breath and get goose bumps when I...

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Do You Sink or Float?

(0) Comments | Posted July 24, 2014 | 10:34 AM

As a writer, I'm always looking for inspiration, and this can come from the strangest of places. My days are spent walking that tightrope between keeping my monkey mind quiet while simultaneously trying to be amped up and creative. There's a great quote by Pablo Picasso that describes this artistic...

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Are You Cultivating Resiliency?

(0) Comments | Posted July 22, 2014 | 9:32 AM

There is a mysterious force underlying everything in this world, and it has an unseen hand in all parts of our life from our job, to our relationships, and even our health. It is a force that is beautifully predictable in its unpredictability. What I'm speaking of is entropy, a...

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If Not Now, When?

(0) Comments | Posted July 16, 2014 | 11:15 AM

I make no secret that I am an addict in recovery, and this has meant devoting myself to, in the words of the AA literature, "clearing away the wreckage of my past." Compared to many other addicts who are recovering from addictions like gambling and sex addiction, drug and alcohol...

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Deciphering Addiction

(1) Comments | Posted July 14, 2014 | 11:08 AM

If the purpose of life is to awaken, then we really have only two choices to make. We can make a conscious decision to learn from joy and freedom, or we can choose to be mired in pain and defiance. I'm sure you've heard the expression happiness is an inside...

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It May Just Be Time to Unlock Your Inner Kid!

(0) Comments | Posted July 7, 2014 | 10:46 AM

I stumbled upon this quote from British writer Brian Aldiss that is brilliant not only for its biting sarcasm but for its frightening truth: "When childhood dies, its corpses are called adults, and they enter society, one of the politer names of hell. That is why we dread children, even...

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A Son's Letter to His Father

(0) Comments | Posted June 11, 2014 | 1:53 PM

I spent the first 18 years of my life living with a stranger -- my father -- and since the birth of my son 24 years ago, I've been slowly getting to know that "stranger," as I am gradually becoming him. Sadly, my father passed away only a few months...

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The Power of a Declaration

(0) Comments | Posted June 6, 2014 | 4:53 PM

This past year it feels as though I've been moving parts of my life around on a giant jigsaw puzzle -- like any puzzle, some of the pieces just seem to slip in together logically, while others are harder to place, especially when I attempt to force them into where...

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Are Sweatpants the New Lingerie?

(0) Comments | Posted June 2, 2014 | 3:56 PM

I was watching the evening news a few years back, and towards the end of the broadcast they played an interview with a feisty elderly couple who were celebrating their 75th wedding anniversary. When asked what the secret was to the incredible longevity of their marriage, the husband got a...

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The Gift You Never Asked For

(0) Comments | Posted May 22, 2014 | 7:08 PM

I'm not surprised when I read about the statistics of the number of people being treated for clinical depression and anxiety. In fact, what is surprising to me is that so many of us continue to get out of bed every day despite the overwhelming odds against us. The stark...

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Are You Ready for Change?

(0) Comments | Posted May 13, 2014 | 2:28 PM

Ever feel as though you're at crossroads -- a place in which you try to convince yourself that if you have the patience and the courage to make some changes in your life, you might just break through to a better you? Whenever "crux moments" appear in our life, they...

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Does Intimacy Have to Involve Sex?

(1) Comments | Posted May 8, 2014 | 2:56 PM

American sociologist Deborah Tannen said: "Communication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence. To survive in the world, we have to act in concert with others, but to survive as ourselves, rather than simply as cogs in a wheel, we have to act alone."...

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