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Jeffery Self

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Why This Gay Guy Loves Elisabeth Hasselbeck

Posted: 01/13/12 06:08 AM ET

A lot of people really dislike Elisabeth Hasselbeck. For one, she's a Republican, which is like being on the second cast of Designing Women: no matter how funny Jan Hooks was, no one ever really got on board, because she was "no Jean Smart." (And by "no one," I mean no one but me. I love Jan Hooks so much, but that's beside the point.)

I really love Elisabeth Hasselbeck. I've watched The View from the beginning, and it's been a huge part of my life for the past 15 years. I was home-schooled for all four years of high school because I was afraid of being bullied, but also so that I could watch The View every day.

Elisabeth joined The View after getting super famous super fast on Survivor. She was a gorgeous, young, blond, and conservative, and America was instantly fascinated. She said some questionable things about gay people and women's right to choose and got into feuds with some of our nation's most respected liberal celebrities. At some point in there, gay people decided that hating Elisabeh Hasselbeck was the "in" thing to do, like Instagramming or watching Taylor Armstrong's life fall apart on Bravo every Monday night.

However, not everyone is as addicted to The View as my boyfriend Patrick and I are, so not everyone has watched Elisabeth come into the light on the issue of gay marriage during the past few years. Just this week she spoke out on Pope Benedict XVI's hate-filled comments on our basic civil rights, saying, "For people to actually say that gay marriage is harming marriage and the idea of marriage is inhumane."

I posted the video clip on my Facebook page, which ignited a large comment thread of the usual Hasselbeck hatred, which I frankly find a little too 2007. My boyfriend and I are constantly defending Hasselbeck anytime she comes up in conversation. My boyfriend is her biggest fan and greatest cheerleader. The mere mention of her name always leads him to tell his amazing Hasselbeck story, one I've heard so many times now that I literally know it by heart.

I have a friend of a friend who works at The View, and while Patrick and I were in New York this past September, I surprised him with a ticket to a taping. I had to work, so Patrick went alone and was seated on the very front row. On his way there he tweeted to all the co-hosts about his overwhelming excitement to attend a taping of the show. As the co-hosts made their entrance and took their seats, Elisabeth looked directly at Patrick with a knowing smile and waved. During the commerical break Elisabeth called out to him, "PattyMac! PattyMac!" which is Patrick's Twitter handle (@PattyMac42) and high school nickname. Patrick looked around to see who she was talking to, then realized she was calling out to him. Patrick spent all of the Hot Topics segment attempting not to wet his pants. (I added that, not Patrick, but I can only assume it's at least partially true.)

Patrick remained on cloud nine until the commercial break, when they allowed a few audience members to ask Elisabeth and Whoopi questions. Patrick's hand was the first one raised, and seeing his intense excitement, they gave him the mic, and he said, "Elisabeth, as a gay man, I just want to thank you for being a constant champion of equal rights. My question to you is: what is the greatest lesson you've learned at The View?"

Elisabeth put her hand on her heart and thanked him for saying that. She told him, "Bringing it back to what you said on gay rights, when my conservative friends first approached me about gay marriage, I'd always ask them if they actually knew anyone who's personally gay. The ones who said, 'Yes, I do," were the ones who always supported gay marriage, because they recognized, as you and I both know, that love is love. Those who opposed the issue were the same ones who said they did not know anyone who was gay. That's the biggest lesson I've learned: to not have an opinion on something you don't know anything about."

After the show she called Patrick to the stage and gave him a huge hug and told him how much what he said about gay rights meant to her. She blew him a kiss, and Patrick hasn't stopped smiling since.

I think what people don't remember is that people can change, views can alter, and realizations are had. Just because Elisabeth Hasselbeck might not have agreed with gay marriage 10 years ago doesn't mean we shouldn't celebrate the fact that she does now. We're supposed to be the accepting ones, the open ones, the nice guys. We're supposed to set the example of what we want to see from our conservative allies. So let's.

On behalf of my boyfriend Patrick McDonald and me: thanks, Elisabeth Hasselbeck. You rock.

 

Follow Jeffery Self on Twitter: www.twitter.com/jefferyself

A lot of people really dislike Elisabeth Hasselbeck. For one, she's a Republican, which is like being on the second cast of Designing Women: no matter how funny Jan Hooks was, no one ever really got o...
A lot of people really dislike Elisabeth Hasselbeck. For one, she's a Republican, which is like being on the second cast of Designing Women: no matter how funny Jan Hooks was, no one ever really got o...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
David Moore
Teacher, German, Math, Pennsylvania
12:45 PM on 01/16/2012
Worthless article. Singing the praises of Elizabeth Hasselbeck sounds more like Stockholm syndrome to me. You have fallen for the guile she has shoveled upon her audience at the View. Do you suppose that rather than evolving, the truth of the matter is that Barbara Walters sat her down and warned her to shape up? Maybe she has had a change of heart, but I don't trust a word she says. You and your boyfriend Patrick may adore her, but I am beside myself for reading this article. Time of my life that I won't get back.
05:11 PM on 01/16/2012
How and what you chose to read is your own responsibility David. Clearly you are invested in Elisabeth Hasslebeck and reading this article was your choice. I also watch The View and believe her feelings toward gays and gay marriage are genuine. I don't agree with everything she says but I don't waste my time criticizing other people who clearly enjoy her and have taken the time to write a cute and sincere article about something so personal.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
TaxpayingVoter
Wait....whut?
11:58 PM on 01/15/2012
I have to agree that she's been evolving since she first appeared on The View. You can see she's open to learning more and that her opinions can change with time and information.

She's impressed me a couple of times, actually.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
girlwild
Corporations aren't people until Texas executes 1
08:28 PM on 01/15/2012
As long as people vote for those who support and advocate for the Republican platform, which is anti-homosexual, anti-woman and pretty much anti-human, they advance these hateful platform policies. Until people start voting against the Republican platform and they still vote for it, they are tacitly promoting it.
02:05 PM on 01/15/2012
You know I don't like her. I think she is very unprofessional. And I remember her gay marriage/toaster comment. However, thanks for posting this story about her. It is nice to know that someone I don't like has a good side to her.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mrmyfld1
The phantom
11:39 AM on 01/15/2012
Everyone has an opinion....guess you get to express yours as well.

For the record....I hate Hasselback, never liked her, never will.
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menmykoko
Feudalism..the original Christian coalition.
12:21 AM on 01/15/2012
Well, you could always join the Log Cabin Republicans. But have no doubt, she will vote against your interests in the next election.
01:23 PM on 01/14/2012
Can I make a couple points? As a 54 year old Republican. I've never considered my self a homophobe and I have love in my heart for all people. I've evolved in my opinion of Gay Marriage. It's none of my business what two consenting adults do and I don't think the Goverment should try to legislate marriage one way or the other. That said, I find the article and the comments that follow to be most intolerant. So I have to ask... who are the true bigots?

The author goes out of his way to take a shot at Republicans, in his opening paragraph. Comparring Republicans as inferior (a very strange comparrison to 'Designing Women') and disliked by many. At least that's the author's opinion of people's feelings towards Ms. Hasselbeck. A quick reading of this threads comments would seem to support his argument. The hatred for Republicans and Ms. Hasselbeck just ozzes throughout the comments.

If I were to summerize them... Ms Hasselbeck is an evil Republican shrew that even though she defended Gay Marriage... one time... she is still to be hated, ridiculed and quite possibly have all her thoughts and opinions removed from public discourse..... because she's a Republican and all good people of thinking and enlightenment should shun her for that offense alone.

You're not pulling us Republicans to your way of thinking... your pushing us away.
Stop hating....... Republicans.
Stop being bigoted... towards Republicans.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
daho
GOP: "Kollege is for snobs."
02:31 PM on 01/15/2012
Right, it's the Republicans who are the "victims" now. Nice spin job. The only difference is you won't see us going to the polls or supporting a platform that denies your right to be Republican.

I am very aware not all Republicans are anti-gay or anti-gay marriage. I imagine it's a number much smaller than half. That said, every Republican that votes Republican (and for their anti-gay platform), are voting to deny gay people their rights. You guys are enablers.
Rambrewster
my micro bio isn't empty, it's not full
08:31 PM on 01/15/2012
Well said!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Contact1972
Honey Badger Don't Care
02:43 PM on 01/15/2012
WOW-the Republican party calls us diseased, calls our lives a 'choice', tells us that we should not have equality under the law and when we fight back, it's the Republican party that's the real victim in all this??

That is rich!
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
magnolialover
08:46 PM on 01/15/2012
Yes don't you know? Calling to bigots really means that you, and I are actually the bigots. They of course use this argument when we also point out racism as directed to POTUS Obama. Thing is, Hasselback may support equal rights, but, the people she s voting for don't. That is, if she votes straight republican.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
LelioRisen
Carpe diem!
11:27 AM on 01/14/2012
You've just taught me something about Elizabeth Hasselback that I was not aware of....and it makes a difference.

Thanks for the lesson!
Rambrewster
my micro bio isn't empty, it's not full
08:32 PM on 01/15/2012
I just learned something new as well. It's not just dogs that can hear her voice.
10:35 AM on 01/14/2012
Sure Elisabeth has changed her views.

But has she ever apologized for saying that gay marriage is like a man marrying a toaster and that gay marriage would lead to pastors being imprisoned (she said this in 2008 when prop 8 was passed).

She demonized gays during a time when gays were still being beat and killed in hate crimes and when gay kids were being bullied to the point of suicide.

And she was never held accountable for her hate and propaganda.

Does she even know the hurt she caused before she had her change of heart? Shouldn't she acknowledge that she said some really disgusting and untrue things that influenced others to have a hard heart against gays?

I wish your boyfriend had asked her about that.
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07:59 AM on 01/14/2012
I've watched Elizabeth Hasselbeck evolve into a gay supporter......from a conservative who was against gay marriage, she's changed her mind with some education and I commend her for that.

Thanks Elizabeth.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Contact1972
Honey Badger Don't Care
01:01 AM on 01/14/2012
Elizabeth constantly lies about where the President stands on marriage. I really wish she would stop.
12:52 AM on 01/14/2012
I'd do her...
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
rickhfx
What if my "gay lifestyle" isn't gay enough ?
09:52 PM on 01/13/2012
Elisabeth Hasselbeck may have softened over the years and become more informed but she is no champion for gay rights. She has a long long way to go to get that title. Don't hate her she just has a bit more growing up to do.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
bmcombs
Liberal, Gay, Atheist - The Whole Package
08:46 PM on 01/13/2012
Reading this - I feel like my teenage girlfriend just saw the guy she likes wave to her in the cafeteria. Really? Someone supporting gay marriage is a massive breakthrough? Her gaining some shred on intelligence beyond experience (ie: reading something) would be helpful. The woman doesn't believe in evolution - my god.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
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06:22 PM on 01/13/2012
People aren't going to stop being Republicans, but they can stop being homophobes. It is profoundly good to have an ally on the other side because more Republicans will listen to her. The women watching her at home who have supported her can see the evolution of her views on gay rights and that will affect them more because they already respect her. We have to stop the us vs. them attitude or we'll never change people's hearts. Jeffery gets that. Bravo!