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Jennifer Chrisler

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One Million LGBT Parents Raising Two Million Kids: What's the Problem?

Posted: 04/21/10 07:15 PM ET

Former Republican Governor Mike Huckabee might want to think twice before opening his mouth next time.

The FOX News host told a student newspaper earlier this month that the country shouldn't "experiment" by allowing gay couples to adopt children. "Children are not puppies," he said. "This is not a time to see if we can experiment and find out, how does this work?"

First, the governor should know that LGBT parenting is already working -- and has been for years. According to UCLA's Williams Institute, there are one million LGBT parents raising approximately two million kids. And those children are doing just fine.

Second, just days after Huckabee made his angry remarks, a judge in conservative Arkansas ruled in favor of gay couples adopting. Ouch. In the governor's home state no less.

Pulaski County Circuit Judge Chris Piazza noted in his opinion that is it not in the state's interest -- nor in the best interest of children -- to exclude an entire group of people from becoming parents. This is what the child welfare experts have been saying for 30 years. The American Academy of Pediatrics, American Medical Association, American Psychological Association, Child Welfare League of America and the National Adoption Center agree gay and lesbian couples are eminently qualified to be parents.

Bottom line: These are the groups that should be making child welfare decisions -- the child welfare experts. Not me. Not Mr. Huckabee. Not civil rights advocates. Not churches or politicians or governments. The Florida legislature in particular should get out of the regulating families business. The state has prevented Martin Gill from adopting two brothers abandoned by their biological parents. Gill and his partner of eight years have been fostering both boys for four years. The state of Florida would rather split those children apart than leave them with the only loving parents they know. How is that in the best interest of these children?

Writer Dan Savage, a gay parent, has the crux of the debate over adoption about right: it's a choice between the 500,000 foster kids in the U.S. having parents or not having parents. Period.

President Obama told Family Equality Council in 2008 that more needs to be done, "to support and strengthen LGBT families. Because equality in relationship, family, and adoption rights is not some abstract principle; it's about whether millions of LGBT Americans can finally live lives marked by dignity and freedom... That's why we have to extend equal treatment in our family and adoption laws."

So let's get to it. We urge the President to make opening more homes to kids waiting in foster care a priority by speaking out -- perhaps during Foster Care Awareness next month -- on the need to end restrictions on the literally hundreds of thousands of LGBT couples who are ready, willing, and able to provide loving, permanent homes. With the President's leadership, we can pass the Every Child Deserves a Family Act (HR 4806) sponsored by Rep. Pete Stark (D-CA), legislation that requires every state to look at the best interest of the children when making placement decisions as opposed to focusing on the sexual orientation, gender identity or marital status of the prospective parents.

There are many important issues on the docket right now in Washington; there always are. But in the midst of a fledging economy and two wars, we must not lose sight of what really matters: the health and welfare of America's children and making families, gay and straight, stronger and healthier.

 
Former Republican Governor Mike Huckabee might want to think twice before opening his mouth next time. The FOX News host told a student newspaper earlier this month that the country shouldn't "experi...
Former Republican Governor Mike Huckabee might want to think twice before opening his mouth next time. The FOX News host told a student newspaper earlier this month that the country shouldn't "experi...
 
 
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03:27 PM on 04/22/2010
I had an aside to an earlier post about Huckabee.

All this stuff about gay rights being "a dangerous social experiment."

Mr. Huckabee et al...

This COUNTRY was started as a "dangerous social experiment."

So, shut it.
HUFFPOST PUNDIT
bklynsparrow
creating reality from unreal things
07:07 PM on 04/22/2010
spot on! Not that Huckabee would understand that (must be that squirrel stew his wife keeps making). :-)
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03:16 PM on 04/22/2010
The reason people like Huckabee aren't sure about the results of such "social experiments" is because they choose to turn a blind eye to ANYTHING gay.

Gay rights is first and foremost about visibility.

A group of people previously, historically pressured to live in silent secrecy to accommodate the comfort of the majority and to protect themselves from persecution now says, "No. Sorry. Those days are over. We're not hiding ourselves or our lives pretending to not exist anymore."

And another group of people are up in arms about that visibility.

Visibility.

If Huckabee and those like him took the time to experience the normalcy of gay people, they would soon find that gays are like everyone else.

But they don't want to experience. They want to conserve not only with their dollars but with their compassion and intellect.
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LMPE
I connect the most dissimilar things
02:44 PM on 04/22/2010
Hey Huckabee! Last time I checked, Jesus didn't endorse hate!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
DevonTexas
Eternal Optimism
02:39 PM on 04/22/2010
Every prospective foster and adoptive parent should be considered on a case by case basis. There are many gay people who would make wonderful parents. States that deny this opportunity to gay people are only hurting themselves due to their bigotry and intolerance.
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HUFFPOST PUNDIT
BlackJAC
It's better to be a black king than a white knight
01:36 PM on 04/22/2010
This week's GLEE kinda dealt with this a little when Rachel is trying to get a straight woman's perspective on dating while being the daughter of gay men. Granted, her dads can offer perspective on what can really give a man a thrill, but since they're men too it's coming from a completely different mindset than hers.
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DevonTexas
Eternal Optimism
02:44 PM on 04/22/2010
Gay men have more depth to them than just how to "thrill" a man!
I haven't seen that episode yet, but I have an idea you missed something about that issue.
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HUFFPOST PUNDIT
BlackJAC
It's better to be a black king than a white knight
03:03 PM on 04/22/2010
The situation was one of gender psychology running up against gender preference, as picking up a person of a given gender is going to involve different strategies based on the gender of the person doing the picking-up. Just look at how sanctioning gay marriage reinforced the long-standing supposition that women crave commitment while men just want casual sex by how it was primarily lesbian couples obtaining it.
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03:21 PM on 04/22/2010
You know, it's funny you say that.

During high school, throughout college, and beyond, I was always "the ear and shoulder" when my female friends had their romantic heartache. I've heard it all. Being in the position presents a unique perspective; I have a man's insight into other males, both gay and straight, due to personal experience, but my brain functions more like a woman's than a man's and I have an understand of a woman's mind, because of the aforementioned friendships, that many of my straight male friends seemingly lack.

(NOTE: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/06/080616-gay-brain.html)
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jcwtts1
Elections have consequences
09:22 AM on 04/22/2010
I have a cousin who is a child advocate, I asked her about the issue recently her comment as someone who does this stuff for a living was an expletive rant about conservatives. The clean version was, "Kids are dying out here. Physically dying, emotionally dying, intellectually dying. Every day I see kids die a little bit more. I could give a sht about the parents lives, who they love who they don't, as long as they love the kids, as long as they are willing to try, that is all anyone should ever care about it. The rest is a waste of time." She also said that on average the LGBT parents are more aware of the challenges involved in the process, better prepared to deal with children who are a little older, and come with their game face on. She's a fan. So is her entire workplace. There are kids just alone out there people. If you have a problem with LGBT adoption and foster care then I assume you are stepping up and adopting kids and opening your home to foster care. Right? Put up or shut up.
10:53 AM on 04/22/2010
Well said... I don't see how allowing gay/lesbian parents to provide a safe, loving atmosphere for these children is "bad" for society, as a lot of the children that don't get adopted and turn 18 don't end up so great on average.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
cloudjungle
07:45 AM on 04/22/2010
I wonder when was the last time a gay/lesbian couple pinned a note to an adopted son and put him on a plane because they didn't want to parent anymore?
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rextrek
50yr old, Moderate-liberal in S.NJ/Phila
09:12 AM on 04/22/2010
....I know right, could you imagine IF "that" happened..??? Ohhh you'd NEVER hear the end of it...and that action would be USED to paint ALL LGBT peoplewith a broad brush, that somehwo they make bad parents.........hmmm, shall we USE that situation to JUDGE all Hetero adopted parents.....Nooo, but could you just for a second, imagine IF it was a Gay cpl returning a child..like that......ahhh the uproar would be deafening!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
jcwtts1
Elections have consequences
09:14 AM on 04/22/2010
I can almost guarantee it has never happened. Imagine how the press would react to that, how they would generalize from that, how that would damage the ability of other LGBT to adopt forever. If it had happened we wouldn't just know about it we would see it as an excuse for bigotry forever.

J
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03:35 PM on 04/22/2010
Yes, it's like when you hear about a man molesting a boy, many people's reaction is "Those gays!" but when one of these female high school teachers has sex with one of her male students....crickets.

I've never been tempted to, in earnest, say, "Those straights!"
04:12 AM on 04/22/2010
addendum: I'd also be slightly disappointed if I just got one mom or one dad. 2 of anything (straight or homosexual) is always better!
04:10 AM on 04/22/2010
I think if I were adopted, I'd be disappointed if I did get a mom and dad, but 2 mothers or 2 fathers is better than nothing!
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01:26 AM on 04/22/2010
"This is what the child welfare experts have been saying for 30 years. The American Academy of Pediatrics, American Medical Association, American Psychological Association, Child Welfare League of America and the National Adoption Center agree gay and lesbian couples are eminently qualified to be parents."

Well of course. Now if only the politicians could be bothered to lightly peruse _evidence_, there would be a lot less "controversy." And I'm not just looking at Huckabee here...
08:16 AM on 04/22/2010
No doubt. It seems they take their own uninformed opinions much too seriously, while neglecting evidence to the contrary.
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FearlessFreep
A radical leftist with a JS Woodsworth avatar.
12:41 AM on 04/22/2010
This website that's been keeping track of Obama's campaign promises says he's failed to keep his promise to speak out in favor of states allowing same-sex couples to adopt children. Shame, shame.
10:54 AM on 04/22/2010
Well, if next month is Foster Care Awareness Month...I say we get on him to make a public statement encourages LGBT adoption!
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
DinNM
I'm 57 and I do as I damn well please!
12:38 AM on 04/22/2010
My feeling is, gay OR straight, kids need loving, stable parents to raise them. The only reason that anti-gay homophobes have for saying gays and lesbians shouldn't be allowed to raise kids is that these homophobes can't stand knowing the perverted sex acts (according to THEM) that they are imagining we do in the privacy of our bedrooms. IN THE PRIVACY OF OUR BEDROOMS, NOT IN FRONT OF OUR KIDS!! I'm so sick and tired of judgemental homophobes who use our sexuality ALONE to define who we are and to pass judgement on us!!!! AND deny us equality!!!! Why do WE have to "behave" in public (no hand holding, kissing, etc.) when straights can virtually MAUL each other everywhere??? Unfit parents? I know LOTS of straight couples who are unfit parents. But there is no IQ test rendered before a marriage license. There SHOULD be!!
10:22 AM on 04/22/2010
Straight couples do plenty of perverted stuff in the bedroom too. I'm fairly certain adoption agencies don't question parents about their sexual proclivities.

"So, do you two own any chains, gags, blindfolds, clamps, etc?"
"Uhh..."
"Guidelines state that adopting couples can have a maximum of 2 ball gags. Do you meet this requirement?"
10:58 PM on 04/21/2010
So homosexuals have become the 'go to' child welfare agency. Who'da thunk?
08:18 AM on 04/22/2010
No they just make for capable parents, oftentimes more than straight parents, that being said I'm a straight single father.
11:09 PM on 04/22/2010
Good for you, daddy. Good for you. Jerome's proud of you.
10:41 PM on 04/21/2010
Are you kidding me, here? The GOP only cares about "kids" when they are globs in the womb of a woman. Once they are born as living, breathing human bengs that need real care, the GOP abandons them. They couldn't care less what happens to kids.

I despise these people.
12:27 AM on 04/22/2010
Exactly, why haven't they realized they are for the 'right to birth' not the right to life
08:19 AM on 04/22/2010
fanned. After their born they just use the kids then to fan their religious political flames.
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09:53 PM on 04/21/2010
I guess the only problem with 1 million parents raising 2 million kids is that it implies that there are 4 kids per couple. Seems a bit much.
11:05 PM on 04/21/2010
I think it means 1 million parents (i.e., 2 million adults) raising 2 million kids (i.e., 2 kids per couple).