I Love My Thighs

I was bulimic at 16. Pregnant at 19. Unhappy and at my highest weight at 24, and very hungry and still unhappy at one of my lowest weights at 27.
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You may groan and think, What is up with this girl?

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But it's true. I love my thighs. You don't have to be a supermodel to feel this way.

We women have a vacillating relationship with different body parts. We love or loathe them depending on the day, week, season or year. In my teens, I hated my thighs. In my adulthood, it was my belly I hated and I only just "disliked" my thighs.

I was bulimic at 16. Pregnant at 19. Unhappy and at my highest weight at 24, and very hungry and still unhappy at one of my lowest weights at 27. My thirties brought clarity on how I wanted to feel, no matter if I was 130 pounds or 110 pounds. Happiness is now my ultimate goal.

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Top left: Tatiana Viviano Photography. Bottom right: Macpherson Photography

When I shifted the focus onto being strong, things in my head shifted, and what my eyes saw was different. When I look at my thighs, I see strength. I don't need to win a fitness competition or be on the cover of a magazine in order for them to be worthy of my love.

When I do squats or lunges, I feel how tight my muscles are and yet, there is still softness in certain places that I'm OK with, because they are mine. I will always exercise for health and will want to stay looking fit because it is more fun than when I was overweight.

In my teens, I wanted stick legs so badly. My five-foot frame didn't come with the genes for that. I was introduced to the term "thunder thighs" and thought that was one of my curses... along with freckles, being chatty and always feeling like a dork. It wasn't until my thirties that I've come to appreciate the beauty in legs that can walk, dance, exercise, run and so much more. I will not ever be a willowy model type with long limbs. I'm a powerhouse instead. A little pint-size powerhouse of muscle, curves and magic that has given birth to five children. How could this body not be a miracle, as it breathes with perfection right now and effortlessly strides across the room, even with a child upon my hip? I love my thighs.

Dear Thighs: Thank you for your service to me, your support in my journey and your strength, despite my disdain for you for many years. Sorry for over-stressing you with exercise and insecurity, overfeeding you with low self-esteem and sugar, and taking you for granted. Yes, I hear you on wanting more yoga and I don't regret the margarita or rice chips at 11 p.m. last night. Self-love is about balance and not restriction and always eating clean. I promise to love you even as you change. Thighs, you will always be worthy of love and praise, no matter what your size or age.

What part of your body can you choose to love now?

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