What Judi Told Rudy

We all know what Rudy Giuliani said to his wife Judi during that instantly famous cell phone call in the middle of his speech to the National Rifle Association in Washington yesterday.

As I prepared to atone on my tribe's holiest of days, my mind drifted from the spiritual realm to down-and-dirty reality --- what happens between spouses.

And I wondered about the other side of that call: What did she say?

I've had some thoughts:

"Rudy, on the way home, could you stop in Virginia and get me a pair of pearl-handled ladies pistols?"

"Rudy, why did Hadassah cancel my Pilates appointment for tomorrow?"

"Rudy, remember --- fat-free soy double-decaf chai moccachino, extra whip!"

and, of course.....

"Rudy, tonight...will you wear the pink teddy?"

Tip of the iceberg, I'm sure. More?

Comments

[DailySally]

Honey, if somebody yells "GUN," don't duck, don't even flinch, it's just me here in the back row trying to make you look fearless.

[Halsey]

Rudy's son doesn't even have his father's cell phone number..ahhh...family values...what is it..5 marriages between Mrs. Guiliana #3 and Ruby..oops..I mean Rudy?

[klondiker]

"Hi, you've reached Judi. Leave a message. Beeep"

[CarnegieHill]

So far, Cassandra's the likely winner: "Rudy, don't forget the cannoli!"

"The Godfather," the NRA and Rudy --- is that not a dream trio?

[Libsrule]

"Rudy? I thought you were going to dump Judi! Why are you keeping her around after you told me you loved only me?"

[THISTLE]

How pathetic was this very staged phone call
from Rudy's __________. Is there anyone in
the country who didn't see right through this
very staged phone call?

[quibbler]

H'mm, now why would wife #3 be keeping such close tabs on Rudy?

[NuAgeDok]

Rudy - this is Judy . . .

Is that a Walther PPK in your pocket or are you just thinking about dressing up for me when you get home?

[dolphinlikr]

Rudy, is Donald Trump kissing your breasts?

[kellygrrrl]

"You piece of Loser, this little stunt is going to cost you more than the time you made me go to lunch with you and introduce you as my cousin Ruby. You wore that pink skirt of mine and it's just completely stretched out and destroyed now. You Owe Me,!"

[cassandra]

Rudy, don't forget the cannoli !

[CornellRedneck]

She probably said, "Darling, I just have to tell you I'm so proud of you at this moment! You are the steadfast soldier this country needs! Oh, by the way, could you pick up an extra-cheese pepperoni pizza on the way home?"

[JacktheBlogger]

"Honey, if these second amendment die-hards buy into your pro-gun poppycock, it's on to South Carolina - where you will be suddenly born-again as a pro life proselytizer. If Mitt can get away with that crap, so can you sweetie?"

[Zhonni]

I think she might have said "hello poopikins! ...are they actually buying it or do they think it's stage? Oh really? They've got to be fools. Anyways, got to go shopping"

[WellbornBroad]

L'Shana Tovah. It had to be the pink teddy.