Irresponsible People Are a Bummer for Everyone, Including Themselves

06/24/2015 01:15 pm ET | Updated Jun 23, 2016

Do you know anyone who is always running late, and missing appointments? It seems like they don't care about honoring their commitments, and maybe they forget their assignments, forget important dates, or forget to bring something. People are constantly becoming upset with them, in their personal life -- with boyfriends or girlfriends, kids, parents -- and in their career-important meetings. People get mad at them because they are just plain rude and irresponsible, right?

Is that the case? Do people choose to be irresponsible? Let's look at this from another angle -- let's assume this person wants to have a wonderful personal life, and move forward in their career. They are going through life pissing off their friends, family, teachers, supervisors, etc., and it feels awful to disappoint the people around you. It feels terrible knowing that you might be fired because you forget something, or that you are going to get a bad grade because you forgot to do an assignment. These people live in constant stress and fear that they are forgetting something. They might be forgetting to take medication! They are forgetting appointments that they made for themselves, and probably even losing money by not paying credit cards on time, and misplacing important mail. Does anyone want to be so irresponsible that they literally have to pay for it? Does anyone truly want to live like that?

What if I told you that many of these people are trying 200 percent to do the best they can, and then they are still told that they are not trying hard enough? Or that they are being told that they don't even care? Sure, everyone has a calendar, but what if you forget to look at it, write something down, or forget your calendar? Or you don't make it a habit of looking at it? Especially when people like this are really intelligent in other ways, it can be easy to say that if they are smart enough to do one thing, they are smart enough to do another thing. I can guarantee you that there are many people who are trying the hardest they can to be responsible in their personal and professional lives, but are incapable of doing so. I know, because that was me.

Because it pains me so much to see people struggle like that, I'd like to ask you to be soft with people who are wasting your time by being late, or seeming to not care about plans with you because they forgot them, or forgetting the assignments or chores that you gave them- because what if they are trying their absolute hardest? Ask them if they want to change, and if so, refer them to me. On my personal journey, I worked with an educational therapist, and took meds from a psychiatrist, but it was only when I changed my diet that my mental functioning was up to par. Food directly affects brain functioning, and everyone is affected by food in different way -- if you, or someone you know seems to constantly be sabotaging themselves, it's possible that they don't even realize that they are not nourishing their brain correctly. ADD or ADHD medication might be able to put a Band-Aid on things, and an educational therapist might help you work extra hard to overcome your obstacles. But unless you get to the root of the problem, you may be making your life more difficult than it needs to be. Why not see how much you can flourish, and how much your life can expand, when your brain and your body are in top shape to help you achieve your personal and professional goals?