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Jim Watkins

Jim Watkins

Posted: April 13, 2010 08:25 PM

Pop Goes the Pope


Finally, John Lennon can truly rest in peace. The Vatican has forgiven him, and his fellow Beatles.

In what could well be the worst attempt ever to change the subject, the Catholic Church has decided now is the time to declare that the Fab Four really were kinda fab, and that all the Satanic/we're-bigger-than-Jesus/play-this-record-backwards-and-you'll-kill-your-parents stuff is just so much holy water under the bridge. From The Daily News:

The Vatican offered its latest peace offering to The Beatles in its recent issue of L'Osservatore Romano, its official newspaper, on Monday.


"It's true they took drugs, lived life to excess because of their success, even said they were bigger than Jesus and put out mysterious messages that were possibly even satanic," the newspaper said.

Wow, doesn't sound like they're in a very forgiving mood to me, listing all those evil acts by the Beatles of 45 years ago all over again. The Church obviously still feels quite wounded and scarred by what these "musicians" wrought upon God's dominion. I wonder what reasoning the Vatican uses to go to its forgiving place.

But, "what would pop music have been like without The Beatles?" it reasoned, describing the band's music as "beautiful."

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. The Catholic Church offers blanket amnesty to sinners and heretics if, in retrospect, said heretics made significant contributions to pop music? Who knew? I guess that puts Phil Spector in the clear. If only Galileo had been able to come up with some catchy hooks, he could have received his forgiveness centuries earlier.

Ringo, bless his heart, isn't having it, correctly noting in a CNN interview that "the Vatican has more to talk about than the Beatles." I assume he's referring to that nagging priest sex abuse scandal that really does belong higher up on the Church's to-do list than offering its belated blessing to a rock and roll band.

But the Pope and his minions aren't getting carried away with this "pop music" loophole:

The Vatican doesn't appear to be extending the same kind of olive branch to other popular bands, such as Pink Floyd, Queen, Black Sabbath and The Eagles.


In 1996, those groups were among several - including The Beatles - that Pope Benedict XVI warned youth against listening to when he was still a cardinal, claiming their music contained "subliminal" satanic influences.

To which I have only one question for the Holy Father: The Eagles?? Really? I used to be a big Eagles fan back in college, and I don't recall a single song that influenced me in a satanic way. Well, I suppose there was "Witchy Woman" from their first album. Last verse:

"I know you want a lover/let me tell you, brother/ she's been sleeping in the Devil's bed.
"And there's some rumors goin' round, someone's underground, she can lock you in the nighttime 'til your skin turns red."

OMG, it is satanic! Thank goodness I never listened to it backwards.

 

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12:33 PM on 05/07/2010
Hello moderator - please post my previous post for all to see. Thanks!! If you have a problem with it please write to me at thetwowitnesses@gmail.com and let me know what I need to modify so that you will post it. Thanks!! Jacob
12:42 PM on 05/07/2010
Hello moderator...write to me at thetwowitnesses at gmail!!! Thanks!!
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MNKen
Eschew Obfuscation
11:37 AM on 04/16/2010
Imagine there's no heaven.
It's easy if you try.
No hell below us,
Above us only sky.

Thank you John.
08:43 AM on 04/16/2010
Vatican forgives The Beatles. Which explains why alter boys are singing “Help!†– Stephen Colbert
Gasparilla
buy your local newspaper
08:54 PM on 04/15/2010
Playing those mind games forever....
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
JayMonaco
03:51 PM on 04/15/2010
Can anybody tell me where I can find the Satanic messages in the Pink Floyd songs so that I can go and listen to them?

I appreciate it.
04:04 PM on 04/15/2010
They did have a song called "Lucifer Sam"...
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JayMonaco
04:51 PM on 04/15/2010
True, I guess, but I think Piper at the Gates of Dawn is a little too tripped out to really be putting forth any sort of cohesive religious message ;)
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catcancook
Obama/Biden 2012
02:46 PM on 04/15/2010
I became an X-Catholic right about the time The Fabulous Beatles landed at JFK in 1964. I always knew that those Catholic priest and popes were up to something fishy. Anyway, The Beatles were my church of choice and I still adore their music today.

he Beatles were always about "Love" in their music anyway, something the Catholic Church knows little about--- along with how to protect innocent children in their flock from molesting priest.
01:37 AM on 04/15/2010
Christ you know it ain't easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They're going to crucify me.
09:24 AM on 04/15/2010
fanned ArthurTwoShedsJackson . . i just couldn't resist . . .
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LMPE
I connect the most dissimilar things
07:22 PM on 04/14/2010
As far as I'm concerned, the Beatles will ALWAYS be more important that anything associated with a decrepit old institution like the Vatican.
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OtayPanky
You're welcome
06:55 PM on 04/14/2010
Blogger: In what could well be the worst attempt ever to change the subject, the Catholic Church has decided now is the time to declare that the Fab Four really were kinda fab, and that all the Satanic/we're-bigger-than-Jesus/play-this-record-backwards-and-you'll-kill-your-parents stuff is just so much holy water under the bridge.

===

I read the news today oh boy
Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire
And though the holes were rather small
They had to count them all
Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall.

I'd love to turn you on
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Glad2bCdn
07:05 PM on 04/14/2010
and the holes where rather small
the priests just had to fill them all
ThinkCreeps
Seriously, it's time.
05:38 PM on 04/14/2010
I hadn't realized that John Lennon was abused as a child.
05:00 PM on 04/14/2010
This is hilarious! Yeah, Guiness book of world records - definitely the WORST attempt to change the subject (Yes, officer, my wife is beside me, dead, and I'm holding the bloody knife - but look! Isn't that a rabbit over there???) I got a little chuckle when I read that they still think rock music has a "satanic" influence. Although I don't know about that John Mayer guy....
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eileenflemingWAWA
http://www.wearewideawake.org/
05:00 PM on 04/14/2010
In the summer of ’66, it was reported that John Lennon made a comment to a friend and reporter that the Beatles were more popular with my generation than Jesus was.

I agreed with him, for my friends and I knew every lyric to every Beatles song, but nobody ever quoted Jesus. Lennon made me think about my own hypocrisy, and that led me to drop the institutional church.

It was in July on a Saturday afternoon, immediately after the ritual of weekly confession that I knelt at the altar and mindlessly repeated the same old prayers as the week prior. But on that particular day in '66, in the middle of the three Our Fathers and ten Hail Mary's, it hit me like a light. Those words that I uttered never changed anything, and I got up and walked out.

John knew, “that what people call God is something in all of us...what Jesus and Mohammed and Buddha and all the rest said was right. It's just that the translations have gone wrong…Jesus was all right, but his disciples were thick and ordinary. It's them twisting it that ruins it for me. You're left with yourself all the time, whatever you do anyway."

Excerpted "October 9, 2008: John Lennon was born 68 years ago today. His physical presence left us 9 days after Dorothy Day's did in 1980. Dorothy Day entered the Catholic church, I left it...

http://wearewideawake.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1062&Itemid=211
07:11 PM on 04/14/2010
A truthful statement by John. In his day, Jesus was probably a minor disturbance in a remote Roman province, simply not very significant, but overtime he snowballed until he ecclipsed the empire, now only a memory.

Childish church. I do not think God does popularity polls.
12:40 PM on 05/07/2010
Hi, Yes Lennon made these comments but the reason that he said them is not very well know. John was a prophet and what he was working towards when talking about how big Christianity is and the fact that it is going to disappear was his poetic way of saying that when the anti-Christ is in power that Christianity will 'die' for a 3.5 year period...In fact, John was so in tune as a result of being one of the two 'two witnesses' that he also understood that the crucifixion of Jesus in the Gospels took place to emulate the 'death' of Christianity at the time that the anti-Christ is to be in power. You need to do some additional reading to get a better grasp on this profound material. Go to thegoodguise at wordpress for the full story...Let me know what you come away with ....cheers!! Jacob
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shubes61
11:47 AM on 04/14/2010
the vatican article is wrong... john lennon did NOT say the beatles were "bigger than Jesus."

the exact quote is "We're more popular than Jesus now"... "popular" has a much more limited meaning than "bigger."

but then... i guess the vatican isn't really known for honesty, is it? (and i was raised catholic.)
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09:30 PM on 04/13/2010
Jim you're hilarious!

If I'm going to forgive Pope Benedict, he would need to have a sit-down with Ozzy. ...Oh, and then he would have to agree to step down.
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11:08 PM on 04/14/2010
Step down, and turn the job over to Ozzy.
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MNKen
Eschew Obfuscation
11:36 AM on 04/16/2010
What an image that brings to mind!
GHarry
Kitty wrangler
08:55 PM on 04/13/2010
Hmmm. I thought the pope's favorite tune was "See What the Boys in the Back Room Will Have."