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Jodi Ciampa

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From One Mother to Another -- Children Are Only Children for Eighteen Years

Posted: 05/ 1/2012 11:35 am

As I stand at the front door to my house watching my children blow dandelions weeds and imagining them spreading all over our yard, I am reminded of a brief statement my mother-in-law said to me in passing. "Children are only children for eighteen years." I can't believe my baby is almost six.

When I am going through the everyday tasks of dressing, feeding, making meals, dropping off, picking up, volunteering, shopping, cleaning, planning, screaming, refereeing and every other chore that makes raising children seem like a life sentence instead of a finite amount of time, I try to remember this statement.

"Children are only children for eighteen years." When I put it into prospective as it relates to my own life, I've lived two childhoods. Compared to the length of time I have been married, I would have a teenager and, in the amount of time I have been out of high school, I could have a child who is the legal drinking age.

Children have such a short time to be kids and we, as parents, have even less until they don't need us anymore. So for now, let them be themselves. Let them get dirty, play in their good clothes, need hugs on demand, want to be held, cuddle up in bed, sneak snacks from the pantry, jump on the couch, read by flashlight, not want to go to sleep and display all the childish behaviors that come along with being a kid as hard as it is. Give them a free pass without telling them to act their age because, frankly, they ARE.

I never realized how fast time went by until I became a parent watching my children grow up right before my eyes. We can never get those years back. Before we know it, their childhood is gone and what we are left with are fading memories. BUT... if we are one of the lucky ones, what they are left with are the lasting impressions that a loving, memorable childhood leave in their minds and hearts.

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08:17 PM on 05/03/2012
Gosh...I can't tell you how many times I've rushed through a moment that I should have slowed down and enjoyed. Great article. Thanks for the reminder. They are only children for 18 years and the time is going by too fast!
12:08 PM on 05/02/2012
Excellent article.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Jodi Ciampa
03:05 PM on 05/02/2012
Thank you Megandale!
04:45 AM on 05/02/2012
Great post Jodi :) It made me stop and think about my children, my childhood, and my way of thinking - it is always a great thing to sit back and have a look at the big picture because you get so caught up mothering your children that you cant see how fast time literally evaporates! thank you x
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Jodi Ciampa
03:09 PM on 05/02/2012
Wow, I never thought of time evaporating! Great visual. Makes you realize even more how precious time is. Thanks Jodi!
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Freedom Mama
Proud to be an American
03:30 PM on 05/01/2012
Great article. I would add making time to just be with them, doing nothing special. I quit my job when my oldest was 6, second was 4. I was stressing over whether or not my decision to quit my job and be a full time mom was the right thing, was I wasting my education, etc. etc, my mother in law said to me "they are only little for such a short time...". That 6 year old is now in college, that 4 year old is considering his college options. I am still home with them (with a third child now as well). I am so glad I took the time to just BE with them. Happiness is sending those "kids" off into the world, and having no regrets.
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Jodi Ciampa
09:38 PM on 05/01/2012
Thank you so much Freedom Mama! I was told the same when I was pregnant with my first. "You will never get those years back." I was a 7th grade teacher and have never once regretted the decision to stay home. I love your comment. Thank you.