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Joel Schwartzberg

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Six Ways Divorced Men Can Treat Themselves (and Their Kids) on Father's Day

Posted: 06/19/11 03:38 AM ET

Traditional Father's Day gifts -- ties, books, wallets, gadgets, golf-themed junk -- ironically have little to do with kids. It's as if the very point of Father's Day is to distract Dad from the fact that he is one.

But for divorced and remarried dads in particular, Father's Day represents a unique and valuable opportunity to genuinely enjoy time with your kids... without martyring yourself and your own personal fulfillment in the process.

Below are inexpensive, but meaningful gift experiences Dad can give himself, with help from his favorite little accomplices.

Picture This
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Get plenty of plain white paper (loot the copy machine at work if you must), and have the kids draw pictures of you and themselves in various settings like the park, the mall, a restaurant, and at Dad's house. Make some yourself too. When done, slip each photo in a three-holed clear plastic sheet and lock them into a three-ring binder.

The picture tributes will not only be protected, but "published". Keep the binder in your home (do NOT send it back with the kids), and add pages as time goes on to keep a visual artistic record of your life and times together.

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Joel Schwartzberg is a dad of three, husband of one, a nationally-published personal essayist, and author of "The 40-Year-Old Version", an award-winning collection of essays.


 
 
 

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Traditional Father's Day gifts -- ties, books, wallets, gadgets, golf-themed junk -- ironically have little to do with kids. It's as if the very point of Father's Day is to distract Dad from the fact ...
Traditional Father's Day gifts -- ties, books, wallets, gadgets, golf-themed junk -- ironically have little to do with kids. It's as if the very point of Father's Day is to distract Dad from the fact ...
 
 
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08:59 PM on 06/19/2011
Oh, you mean "Arrive at the ex's house to pick the kids up for the day only to find out they are not there, then spend the rest of the day tracking them down" didn't make the list?
08:43 PM on 06/19/2011
I thought this was pretty sweet. Low cost ways to connect with your kids, make the day memorable and not make the kids feel bad that they don't have a girt for Dad.
tinygiraffe
I'm more of a macro-bio girl, to be honest.
04:42 PM on 06/19/2011
Maybe we could retitle this list "How to Be Sedentary with Your Kids." Because as slide #2 so offensively puts it "No one does lazy like Dad."

None of these ideas are nontraditional or innovative at all. My single-dad boyfriend and I (a single mom) interact with our kids on this level pretty much every day. Sometimes the dishes pile up or we have to go on a "safari" (nonvirtual) for clean socks, but we have mountains of collaborative artwork, banged up tennis rackets, and happy, invigorated kids more than one day per year.
11:49 AM on 06/19/2011
Why does all parenting advice seem to stop at about six-year-olds? This list won't do anything for my teenage daughters...
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FPhoebe
HP badges make me feel validated.
02:25 PM on 06/19/2011
I'm 23 and I'd still go for the movies idea...even if it was a 'kids' movie. Mini-golfing and bowling is fun too... as long as your teenage daughters' friends aren't around, (because it's ooooh sooo embarrassing to be seen out with your family until around the age of 19) you will all have a great time!
11:36 AM on 06/19/2011
Should probably not advise people to steal from their employer.
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11:04 AM on 06/19/2011
Inane.