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Help Me Understand Why We Have So Many Misunderstandings About Book Writing

Posted: 01/04/12 11:27 AM ET

You remember books, surely? Those oblong things made of paper that contained words and, often, wisdom. Carry them anywhere, read them anywhere, no batteries needed, no need to turn them off on an airliner, ever. Handed down, they can be read by dozens, scores, hundreds more readers, at zero cost. They are 100% recyclable.

"If they asked me (I could write a book)" -- thanks, Richard Rogers and Lorenz Hart. Lovely words with important meaning. But writing books is not easy. It takes -- gasp, shudder -- thought. One captain of industry (a household name) once rejected a book proposal about his pioneering company with these words: "I don't need help with a book. I've written term papers." I wanted to explain the difference but he had no 'receive' mode, only 'transmit.' He didn't have the time to write it, either.

Many of my acquaintances want to write a book or, having written one, want to get it published, in an era of horrendous media upheaval and hard times in the traditional publishing arena. I ask them always to consider the facts of life in this age of bottom-line, 'pull' publishing in which publishers rarely support new authors, except via personal introduction by insiders. If you have a publishing ambition, consider these realities:

If you get a great, original idea for a book -- fiction or nonfiction;
And if you have the skill, energy and dedication to write it;
And if, preferably, you're a young, female MFA of 'desirable' ethnicity, and can
regurgitate childhood memories (often masquerading as 'fiction');
And if you manage to hit a cultural fad window successfully;
And if you know a friendly editor to straighten you out before submission;
And if you have the courage, skill and will to edit your own work meticulously;
And if you can find the right professional agent to represent your oeuvre;
And if that agent reads your work, likes it and agrees to represent you;
And if that agent knows a publisher's editor by first name who might like it because
it lies precisely in his or her area of interest or genre;
And if that editor likes it enough to put in on his or her work list;
And if it survives the competition vs. the house's other projects;
And if the book acquires production values and a publicity budget to promote the
work (i.e. publisher investment based on estimated potential revenues);
And if the critics, reviewing perhaps one in a hundred books, review and like it;
And if the media, handling few per hundred offerings, use the review;
And if the distribution system, selling >95% by volume and taking <5% by title of
books offered (mostly from 'name' writers), accepts and distributes the book;
And if enough word-of-mouth recommendation generates worthwhile sales
numbers and long-term attention for the work;
Then maybe, just maybe, you will have published a successful book.

Don't try to spend the money until the check clears. The odds of the above happening -- all must, serially, for success -- are one in hundreds of thousands and may take years or decades. Odds are higher that you'll be struck by lightning or win the lottery, or shrivel and die of old age. I've written 20 books, have been published in New York (Morrow, fiction; Ballantine, nonfiction) but I can't get my stuff read -- 500 agent queries in the last three years: 0 results. Welcome to the writing life.

Or am I perhaps suffering from delusions of adequacy? If you comment, please be kind.

 
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Dorothy Moody
Secular Humanist, Independent, Goofball
01:57 AM on 01/10/2012
I think you've hit the nail on the head, my friend! So many hoops to jump through, and many of them don't appear until we think we've jumped through them all. Still, I persevere and hope that my hard work and determination to find just the right butt to kiss will eventually pay off.
10:47 AM on 01/06/2012
I am indebted to the thoughtful and perceptive writers who have commented on my post. I assure you that I did not wish to give offense in any way, merely to make a point. All generalizations are false, a paradox.
Self-publishing and ebooks are solutions, but in this era of the cult of personality/celebrity it's hard to gain reader attentiob. Lightning does strike--for example, the vampire fad that has enriched some writers.
The single most interesting comment noted the struggle of writing itself. It is not easy and it is a lonely grind. As a personal example, I spent 8,000 hours over an eight-year period researching, writing and editing a book about a Navy pilot shot down in Vietnam, extracted from Hanoi to the USSR to train their pilots in air combat, sent to the gulag and rescued by his sister and a Russian defector pilot (my co-author was Viktor Belenko). It's fact-based: ~600 aircrew were lost over Laos and Cambodia and never accounted for. Many were taken by the Soviets, their custom since WWII and Korea. No interest by agents and publishers.
Agreed, it is not easy. But great writing will occasionally prevail. I wish all who read this the very best with their work. Do something vile or be a celebrity and 'they' will beat a path to your door, or write with integrity and see the task itself as worth doing excellently.
02:40 PM on 01/05/2012
Interesting list. Not sure all apply, though; it depends on what kind of writing you do, why you do it, and what kind of writer you are interested in becoming.

I finished a novel in 1995 and, after sending it here and there, to publishers and agents in canada, england, and the states, it was accepted in 2009 and came out in October 2010, to critical acclaim here, in the states, and in england. The rejections for that book number somewhere in the 20-30 range. (The late David Markson, a much, much better writer, apparently received nearly 60 rejections for one of his books that's now considered an important novel.) Needless to say, a 15-year wait isn't recommended. That's just the way it went. I've never had an agent, never took a writing course, and entered my book in a publisher's contest.

No one asked us to be writers, as another writer said to me, so we can't go complaining overmuch (we can still complain some) if things get hard now and then. That's about as consoling and kind as it gets, John. I do wish you luck.

Jeff Bursey,
author of
Verbatim: A Novel
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Tiffany Hawk
10:06 AM on 01/05/2012
Wow, although I whole-heartedly agree that it's a difficult time to be submitting a book to publishers, I find this post bitter and offensive. You don't have to be an insider, nor do you have to be a woman of a "desirable ethnicity." White men are getting book deals, just like they're getting jobs and college degrees despite this idea of reverse prejudice. I didn't know anyone, I'm white, and although it was a huge uphill battle that I worked at for years, I recently sold my debut novel. I do have an MFA, but I worked my butt off for it and found it tremendously valuable in terms of learning to write better, so I can't imagine how that is a bad thing. It wasn't something that was given to me or that I was born into. In fact, I was the first woman in my entire extended family to go to college at all. If writers are willing to keep working hard, and I by that I mean ten years of dedication, they can get where they want to go. Yes, it's really hard out there right now, brutal even, but don't make excuses, turn sexist and racist, and try to bring other aspiring writers down just to make yourself feel better. Besides, isn’t having a positive attitude supposed to help? Not to mention make life a more pleasant experience. Sheesh.
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Dallas Dunlap
06:53 AM on 01/05/2012
I considered all that long ago and so I didn't write for publication for years. But the advent of Amazon's Kindle and its self publishing model, coincident with my retirement, I'm in the writing game. I have two e-books avaiable on Kindle, am working on another one.
I don't know yet whether I'll go to print on demand. I'm getting better at the writing lately, but I haven't really worked on marketing yet. But authors have made significant money writing e-books.
Bottom line: There are two publishing models: The highly restricted in-bred commercial-literary model and the "every man for himself" world of indie writing.
If you're having trouble getting published, take a look at going indie.

http://www.amazon.com/Eater-Souls-Food-ebook/dp/B006GT3CT0/ref=
04:55 AM on 01/05/2012
You can always self publish, no shame in it if you deliver great quality work.

With the rise of e-books it easily done. (not the writing part)
02:35 PM on 01/04/2012
Read Be The Monkey on Barry Eisler's website, it should cheer you up

http://www.barryeisler.com/media/BeTheMonkey.pdf
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Michael Conniff
journalist, novelist, talk show host,
01:07 PM on 01/04/2012
None of this, however true, has anything to do with the act of writing. In a world of self-publishing, no one need be unpublished. If the writing is a commercial enterprise, then accept the slings and arrows. If you're going for something bigger--literature--then go for it and stop complaining. This is the best time ever for writers because the middleman is being cut out. best, mc!
12:14 PM on 01/04/2012
That's depressing. I wonder how many great works are just collecting dust...
12:07 PM on 01/04/2012
Great stuff! Come sell your books at Farmers Markets, you can set up a table right next to me!!
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Bill Robinson
12:05 PM on 01/04/2012
Mr. Joss tells it like it is here in this treatise. There's no pride or shying away from the myriad intricacies and harsh realities of writing a book in his experience and that is real courage on his part.

I look forward to hearing many more of Joss's 'takes' on an assortment of issues and weighty scenarios!