Dear Sarah, Please, Please, Please Sue Me

I know how victimized you feel about the lies being spread online and in the media. I know you believe it's your right to threaten and silence those who would question or disagree with you. So let me offer my help in giving you the grounds to sue me for defamation, win and drive a stake into the heart of the First Amendment.

Because everything I'm now going to write about you in this public forum is a total lie:

Ready?

God, I admire you.

You are a skilled public speaker, a thoughtful public strategist and a natural leader.

You should wear longer skirts because your legs are an embarrassment.

The thought of you holding political office fills me with pride and joy.

Your reason for resigning will soon be revealed as measured, selfless and strategically brilliant. In future histories written about you it will be referred to as "the genius move."

You have been the recipient of more unfair attacks than any figure in world history.

And in the future, the words "quitter," "diva," "crybaby," "psycho," and "Little Miss Pouty Pants" will never be used against you.

I hate your hair, especially when it's kind of down and loose and... y'know.

You are a lock for president in 2012. Obama should just give up now. Because that guy's the kind of leader who, when he's questioned or attacked, just fires back low level insults then stomps off to sulk. You will wipe that guy off the map. Poor Obama.

You are the Democratic Party's worst nightmare.

You are respected.

Feared.

And will never be a political punchline.

I love you and truly hope that after you sue me, beat me and silence all dissent, you ascend to the heights of absolute monarchy and bring about the nation of intolerance, ignorance, fear and greed you see in the rabid faces of your followers.

You don't remind me at all of the President in THE DEAD ZONE. Not even a little.

That's it.

Consider yourself defamed, Madam, and let our journey together now begin.

I await your attorney's first threatening phone call by holding my breath starting... hang on... now.

Yours Truly,

John McNamara

Comments

[t mout]

Yes. It's fantastic. Seriously, you are right on.

[rjw918]

Great minds think alike (well, McNamara's reason isn't as pathetic as mine....)

http://rjw-progressive.blogspot.com/2009/07/palin-is-doo-doo-head.html

[ofcoursejesusisblack]

Hilarious! Other than that I'm not what sure what to say :) LOL!

[SouthernYankeeBelle]

Me thinks she protests to much. Why is she so afraid of a blogger? Maybe, just maybe there is some truth in what the blogger said.

[smoovejef]

That was hilarious. Adding my own two cents worth (adjusted for inflation):

I could never associate you with a female dog.

Tina Fey's portrayal of you wasn't even close.

You are what every girl aspires to be.

Michelle Obama is intimidated by your intelligence.

John McCain so did not want to get in your skirts.

I'm such an awful liar, my heartfelt apologies to our future president, Sarah Palin.

[CommonSenseMom]

I was almost successful in not peeing in my pants at the article...then your two cents.... LMAO!!!

So true and so funny. Awesome post!

[ReallyMe]

Well, that was fun.

[rubygreen]

Love it! Thankyou John, not sure she won't think you're telling the truth, you know how she fibs.