iPhone app iPad app Android phone app Android tablet app More

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors
John Shore

John Shore

Posted: October 2, 2010 09:16 PM

These days, every Christian who is "against homosexuality" (whatever in the name of Monstro's blowhole that actually means) presents the same argument. That argument is ... well, this, taken directly from an email sent me this morning:

Would you support a serial adulterer who loves his wife, but is just attracted to other women because that's who he is and how he was born? How about an alcoholic who just can't help himself? Would you support him as he leaves his wife for alcohol? A glutton? A man of extreme pride? Why does homosexuality get a pass, and not any other sin? A person with homosexual desires who resists temptation is exactly the same as a married man who resists temptation to carry on affairs with other women---which is to say, a human being battling the temptation to sin. The most compassionate thing that we could tell someone struggling with homosexuality (or any other sin for that matter) is to keep resisting temptation. Keep battling. Don't give in. This is your badge as a Christian, that you fight temptation

Um ... for the record, I do not make this stuff up.

By "these days," I mean that the Christian argument against homosexuality has changed. It used to be, "Gays are really only messed-up straight people. They should let Jesus make them straight, so that they can stop acting all gay and not go to hell."

Nowadays, the Christian refrain isn't, "Stop being gay." Now it is, "Stop acting gay." They've given up trying to argue that the homosexual can change his or her sexual orientation: the complete failure of Christian Fix-a-Gay and Homo No' Mo! programs---not to mention a universe of anecdotal and empirical evidence---have left them little choice. So they've changed their approach. Now the argument is ... well, just like my emailer said: A homosexual struggling against the temptation to act homosexual is no different from anyone else struggling to resist a sinful temptation.

Christians love this new argument. If I've heard it once, I've heard it ten thousand times. We all have. You whisper "gay" into the ear of a sleeping Christian, and there's an excellent chance they'll just start saying it in their sleep. "Just like any other sinful temptation. We're all sinners. Must resist."

And putting your brain to sleep before you say that is the very best way to say it, too. Because it could only make sense to a brain-dead person. It's just . . . too stupid for words.

But lemme try anyway.

Virtually all sins share a crucial, defining, common quality. Because that quality, which is present in every other imaginable sin, is utterly missing from being or acting gay, insisting on putting homosexuality into the same category as every other sin is like gluing wings on a pig, and insisting it belongs in the category of "bird." It doesn't. It can't. It won't. Ever.

Here is that Big Difference between homosexuality and other sins: There is no sin I can commit that, by virtue of committing it, renders me incapable of loving or being loved. I can commit murder. I can steal. I can rob. I can rape. I can drink myself to death. I can do any terrible thing at all---and no one would ever claim that intrinsic to the condition that gave rise to my doing that terrible thing is that I am, by nature, simply incapable of giving or receiving love.

No one tells the chronic drinker, or glutton, or adulterer, or any other kind of sinner, to stop experiencing love. Yet that's exactly what so many Christians are insisting gay people do.

When you tell a gay person to "resist" being gay, what you are really telling them---what you really mean---is for them to be celibate.

What you are truly and actually saying is that you want them to condemn themselves to a life devoid of love.

Be alone, you're demanding. Live alone. Don't hold anyone's hand. Don't snuggle on your couch with anyone. Don't cuddle up with anyone at night before you fall asleep. Don't have anyone to chat with over coffee in the morning.

Do not bind your life to that of another. Live your whole life without knowing that joy, that sharing, that peace.

Just say "no" to love.

Be alone. Live alone. Die alone.

The "sinful temptation" that Christians are forever urging LGBT people to resist is love.

Being, of course, the one thing Jesus was most clear about wanting his followers to extend to others.

Can we stop with this cruel idiocy already?

****

John also blogs on JohnShore.com. You're invited to join his fan page on Facebook (where he's forever hanging out all day and goofing around with others who have).

Related posts of John's: "What Would Jesus Do If Invited to a Gay Wedding?" and, "Christians: When It Comes to Homosexuality, Man Up."

 
 
 

Follow John Shore on Twitter: www.twitter.com/johnshore

These days, every Christian who is "against homosexuality" (whatever in the name of Monstro's blowhole that actually means) presents the same argument. That argument is ... well, this, taken directly ...
These days, every Christian who is "against homosexuality" (whatever in the name of Monstro's blowhole that actually means) presents the same argument. That argument is ... well, this, taken directly ...
 
 
  • Comments
  • 1,390
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Comments are closed for this entry
View All
Favorites
Recency  | 
Popularity
Page: 1 2 3 4 5  Next ›  Last »  (13 total)
10:14 AM on 10/15/2010
I think this is a great article from the standpoint that it brings up a much forgotten side of the story. However, this does not address the biblical issue. If Paul is right, which he must be, than the love that homosexuals need to give up is love of self. For Romans is very clear that God gave them up to lusts of their heart because they knew God, but did not honor him as God. See Romans 1: 1-32. However, he continues in Romans 2 to say, it is because of God's patience and kindness he is providing opportunities for repentence.

You see, if we are to live out our faith and fully address the homosexual issue, than we have to do it fairly and in full accordance with scripture. But, this has to be looked at from all sides. As a heterosexual believer, how should these words move me to relate to my homosexual bros. and sisters. But even further, how should they show love and understanding to me, and also move towards God?

This is a serious topic that can only be addressed if we rightly understand the Word of Truth.
09:39 AM on 10/14/2010
I would also add that our loving and being loved, or for that matter having consensual sex without love, as people often do - hurts no one. So along with this article - it's important to add that 'sin' has a victim. Some 'sin' is downright against the law (murder, rape, stealing) while other 'sin' is self-hurting (arrogance, greed). My love for another man hurts no one - including myself. If a person is using their religious views to judge individuals who are harming no one and breaking no laws - they are no different than any other religious demagogue and need to be reminded that we are a nation of laws - not scriptures. We are a nation ruled by a 230 year old evolving and amendable document not a 2000 year old static rule book.
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
John Shore
Author of "UNFAIR"
12:23 AM on 10/18/2010
Hey, Antonio. I actually make the very good point you've here made in this piece o' mine:

http://johnshore.com/2010/03/13/christians-when-it-comes-to-homosexuality-man-up/
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
CaveatLector
08:39 AM on 10/12/2010
I hate the anaology by fundies of being gay and alcoholism. It is saying that homosexuality is a compulsion and will be done to the detriment of ones basic needs. Such hogwash.
09:24 PM on 10/11/2010
There are countless men and women (myself included) that are attracted to the same sex and do not claim to resist temptation by their own strength. I choose not to act on the impulses because my sexuality does not define me and is not where I find ultimate value in life. The Christian is to find all their satisfaction and worth in Jesus Christ. His work on the cross in taking on the flesh of man and dying for the very people He created is the purest example of love and I do not need anything else in my life to make me content except living for Him and receiving His love. It's a very Western idea to say that all of life is whether or not a person is happy. I see the hope of heaven and the wiping away of every tear on my face as more important than having a husband or boyfriend. Sure, it's hard and I still have desires for other men. But it is the Spirit of God that lives within me whom fights for me and grows me to become more like Jesus. Jesus Himself had no family or money and was killed at 33. I have no entitlement in this life except the wrath of God and eternity in Hell, but I rejoice everyday and take heart because Jesus took that upon Himself so I could be with Him. Now that's love.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
cwebster
predominantly exasperated
02:01 AM on 10/13/2010
That's lovely for you, but it's not the solution for everyone.

I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.
08:46 PM on 10/13/2010
It seems you are assuming that 1 Corinthians 7 could be referring to homosexual men and women, as well as heterosexual ones. However, this is not the case. Paul himself wrote against homosexuality in the book of Romans (Ch 1:26-27) and though Jesus did not condemn homosexuality, he did affirm the inspiration and authority of the Old Testament (Matt 15:6, Mark 7:13, John 10:35, John 10:35, John 17:17, Matt. 22:29). Therefore, there it is not possible for 1 Corinthians 7 to be interpreted in a way that includes a gay audience, or in a way that affirms homosexuality.

I don't mean to sound hateful, argumentative, or condemning. Jesus preached about love and grace that is definitely for all people (gay or straight); however, in order to fully experience the salvation given by Christ one must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow (Matt. 16:24-18). Jesus never promised it would be easy, but He did promise an eternal weight of glory that overshadows any earthly pleasure (including relationships in this life).
09:24 PM on 10/11/2010
Mr. Shore, I am deeply sorry for any hatred any Christian has caused you or other loved ones in your life; however, this entire piece is dripping with blind emotionalism, flawed logic, and theological ignorance. I will say, though, that your complaint re: the "just resist temptation" argument is legitimate. I wholeheartedly agree with you that it is wrong for Christians to expect individuals who consider themselves gay/have homosexual inclinations to simply modify their behavior for the rest of their lives. Jesus did not teach his followers to grow or change by willpower or brute force, but by His Spirit. Your thesis about the relationship between other sins and homosexuality assumes that your definition of love is objective, that it is agreed upon by all people. In other words, your argument lacks evidence that is not subjective. I would argue that love is defined by God since He is the Creator of all things (you might argue the validity of that, but the Bible's authority is another discussion). But all that aside, you might consider the very essence and central importance to Christianity: Jesus Christ.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
01:14 AM on 10/12/2010
You base your entire worldview on something for which you have absolutely no evidence, and you're accusing the author of blind emotionalism and flawed logic?
01:21 PM on 10/12/2010
No evidence? If you're going to question the validity of the Bible as a historical document or reliable source, then you must also throw out all ancient history (Rome, Babylon, etc). What makes you believe that the Bible is unreliable? If Jesus was, indeed, resurrected around 3 AD, then how do you think we could know for sure other than written manuscripts? What other evidence could there be? The author subscribes to a post-modern worldview when he talks about "love," but defines the word himself. He lets his emotions guide him rather than anything objective, and then uses his self-created standard to judge others.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
CaveatLector
08:40 AM on 10/12/2010
How white of you. Lots of big words.
01:24 PM on 10/12/2010
I'm sorry if it seemed like I was trying to use big words. I definitely don't think I'm a very good writer.
05:34 PM on 10/11/2010
My favorite part of any anti-homosexual preaching, is how appealing it makes homosexuality sound. They describe the "homosexual lifestyle" using words like lustful, decadent, tempting, sinful, indulgent, irresistible... basically identical language that a tacky restaurant would use to describe some extravagant chocolate dessert. In the end the speech always starts to sound like "Of course we would all lovvvve to have gay sex... delicious, awesome, sweaty, gay gay sex. But god says its icky. I know, its a bummer, but we just can't." I happen to be straight, but those hateful homophobic speeches sometimes make me feel as though I'm really missing out.
01:42 PM on 10/12/2010
I find it interesting how many of the people who are "against gay sex" seem to be completely obsessed with it.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
cwebster
predominantly exasperated
02:03 AM on 10/13/2010
I think they are more obsessed with it than the participants are...
01:06 PM on 10/10/2010
The emailer's logic is flawed because it compares behavior, which can be changed, to sexual orientation, which cannot be changed. Proof lies in the cases of children born with both sets of sexual organs where the doctor and parents have to choose orientation toward maleness or femaleness. Sometimes their choice in choosing a particular set of organs is correct and eventually matches up with their secondary sexual characteristics, other times it is not. There is much more that has to be learned before anyone steps into God's "shoes" and declares homosexuality sinful.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sonny Mobley
05:11 PM on 10/11/2010
I declare it not sinful. So we can leave the boogeyman in the sky out of it now. ^_^
09:47 AM on 10/09/2010
Please don't believe that ALL Christians believe what this article describes. There are many different kinds of Christians -- take a look at the Episcopal Church, plenty of non-celibate partnered gay clergy, including two bishops -- and we are Christians -- who do not agree with this wounding argument which you rightly dissect.
05:51 PM on 10/08/2010
Im just so damn glad that my God (the same one the nutjobs endorse) made me Gay. I thank him every day. Wouldnt want it any other way. Thank ya Jesus!
04:20 PM on 10/08/2010
My account here was deleted because I posted comments that do not support the authors premise and I disagreed with a number of posters and could back up my assertions. Such a level playing you have here!!--I guess having one or two people that disgree with the majority is really more than you can handle here.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
05:46 PM on 10/08/2010
There are plenty of other "comments that do not support the authors premise" still posted here. Stop playing the victim.
11:40 PM on 10/12/2010
my account was DELETED after I came back to answer peoples comments to me, such as yours. That's hardly PLAYING victim.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
cwebster
predominantly exasperated
08:10 PM on 10/08/2010
sotypical...I would think you probably posted something offensive.
11:40 PM on 10/12/2010
not agreeing with the huffpo position on homosexuality is all that it takes to be 'offensive' here.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
08:55 PM on 10/07/2010
Nice try, turniptruck, but I'm not going to let you dodge the question. Why aren't you protesting against those who are marrying in the name of false gods, which is in *clear* violation of your first commandment? Please answer the question.

"But those who accept Christ are duty bound to live by his teaching. "

Fine, but I'm not. And you have no right to impose your religious beliefs on me. Expanding the definition of marriage to include same-sex couples affects *no one* except for same-sex couples.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Ioan Lightoller
Proud Gay Pagan Man, Living Happily With Husband
03:16 PM on 10/08/2010
Wish I could fan you twice! But I faved you. I'm not bound by the dictates of their religion either. So they can quit trying to make me what I'm not.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
03:54 PM on 10/08/2010
;-)

They always avoid the tough questions.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
MatthewRobertson
I'm 26. I'm gay. I like film. I care about shit.
09:49 PM on 10/09/2010
I've asked this question time and time again to Christians and have never gotten a response.

I also propose the question: What about outlawing marriage between people of different faiths and cultures? That too is prohibited by scripture.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
01:59 AM on 10/11/2010
Exactly! They don't answer because there *is* no rational answer.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
CaveatLector
08:43 AM on 10/12/2010
That is the LEAST of the laws that true adherents to scripture ignore. Wearing clothes made of 2 different fabrics, not beating your wife, refusing to keep slaves, touching women who are menstruating, and a whole host of other weird and strange stuff. Oh, I know...those were ancient laws. Cafeteria Christianity---ain't it a marvel?
07:48 PM on 10/07/2010
Christians are hung up on sex. They suggest things in these debates that I don't even think about. I have to wonder about their preoccupation with "how we do it." On sites that I have debated this on, they are more concerned with my being gay than my leaving Christianity for paganism, the latter of which should be by their standards more despicable. Really, their preoccupation with sex is appalling. They have dirty minds, to say the least. And Scripture actually commands that they not speak of what sinners do in private, yet they can't get enough of the debate. I think they need therapy...
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
08:01 PM on 10/07/2010
The most sexually-obsessed people in the world are religious conservatives. It's no wonder that they are always trying to label gay people as sexually-obsessed. Classic projection. (Almost as classic as their projection about indoctrination.)

I recently heard someone define religious conservatism as "the pathological fear that someone, somewhere is enjoying themselves." I think that sums it up perfectly.
08:05 PM on 10/07/2010
LOL--that is for sure. I know for a fact that when a scandal is reported in church, there are many men sitting there thinking to themselves how lucky the man was that "went for it." Of course, with their wives sitting there beside them, they will of course condemn the man caught in the scandal, but they are contemplating it themselves. It truly does boil down to their fear that we are not in bondage like they are.
10:29 AM on 10/07/2010
What a fantastic article! Well written, John Shore! I absolutely loved everything you had to say and you NAILED IT.

Jesus preached love. Simply love. He never taught anything about shunning the gays or that being gay is wrong and sinful. So, Christians....let's follow what He says, eh? JUST LOVE.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
09:26 AM on 10/07/2010
Why can't this "Christian" flavor of fanatic take their own advice and stop acting like they care when they're just venting their frustration that the world doesn't conform to their idea of what it should be?

I swear, these people are simply in arrested development, stuck around age 10.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
03:07 PM on 10/07/2010
Because deep down inside they know they are placing their faith in a fragile house of cards that can be leveled with the slightest breeze, so they spend their entire lives trying to prove to themselves over and over that they are morally superior to everyone else.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
jeremyfive
09:12 AM on 10/07/2010
Love the sinner, hate the sin. "America's Christless Christians" can conjure up a whole lot of sin, can't they?

I prefer the "Are you free Saturday night?" approach to homosexuality. We meet, date and bond, just like everyone else.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
mercury613
In the blue TV screen light
05:05 PM on 10/07/2010
"Love the sinner, hate the sin" is what cowards say when they don't want to take responsibility for their hatred.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
cwebster
predominantly exasperated
07:38 PM on 10/07/2010
If they didn't hate the alleged sinner, they wouldn't be bothering to admonish them.