I thought I was prepared to be a parent.
I mean after all, I have been dad for almost eight years now. I've changed my fair share of diapers, packed a good number of school lunches and washed numerous loads of laundry. Turns out that that is the easy stuff.
No one ever prepared me for the emotions involved in this whole parenting thing.
It's not something that you read about, because I don't know if anyone can actually describe how you are going to feel at any given moment. One second you are happy as can be that your son got a hit in a tee ball game, the next you're crying your eyes out dropping your kid off on the last day of preschool.
That was me.
I didn't realize how difficult of a moment this would be for me, seeing him disappear through the doors of his school of two years for the last time. My little guy is going in those doors a little boy and coming out a big kid. There will be no more driving him to school everyday, blaring one of his favorite songs on the radio. No more opening the door for him and telling him to have a great day. Our little morning routine is changing, forever.
My little boy is changing, forever.
He's growing up. Fast. As much as I don't like to see it happen I am going to have to accept that reality sooner or later. One of these years I will be dropping him off at college seeing him disappear through the doors of his dormitory. I'm not prepared for that.
I don't know if ever will be.
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No.
My son, newly married, finishing submarine school in Connecticut, is a fine young man and I'm immensely proud of him and of his accomplishments.
But somewhere down in my heart, he will always be the little boy whose favorite climb toy is dad. The idea that he is on his own, a responsible adult, is something that I'm happy with, proud of, but will never be entirely ready for.
And I think that's the way it's supposed to be.
We are their leaders and role models they need us.Children learn by what they see us do
if parents are not around much or fail to teach them what they need to know. There's no
one to blame but you because you failed them.
22 year old son- A recently commissioned officer in the Marine Corps
19 year old daughter - College student, made the Dean's list
5 year old son - normal in every way
1 year old son - a little monster.
So far they are are on track to being normal well-adjusted human beings and I have ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE what I did to achieve this goal.
I made my own mistakes, but I have remained close to my boys all throughout their lives.