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Jonathan Dudley

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Evangelicals and Gay Marriage: Why 'Love the Sinner, Hate the Sin' Doesn't Work

Posted: 10/22/11 04:40 PM ET

Shortly before National Coming Out Day, Focus on the Family's Jim Daly published an Op-Ed on CNN.com. "'Hate' is too big a word to be used with such little restraint," he argued, urging advocates of gay rights to realize that evangelicals don't hate gay people, just gay sexual activity.

Such sentiments are widespread among evangelicals, even encapsulated in a maxim: "love the sinner, hate the sin." They explain why well-meaning people think keeping gays from marriage is the loving thing to do. But as an overriding moral principle, the maxim fails miserably.

The best way to understand why is to look at it in light of Christian history. Slave-holding Christians in the 1700s and 1800s believed that, because God had ordained some be slaves, keeping slaves in chains was actually the loving thing to do. As slave-turned-orator Frederick Douglass recounted the reasoning: "God made one portion of men to do the working, and another to do the thinking." And if that's the case, isn't more loving to insist slaves occupy the roles God has created for them than ignore God's will and allow slaves to be free? Many brilliant, well-meaning, genuine Christians at the time answered "yes," including Charles Hodge, a Princeton theologian and father of modern evangelical theology.

Although some evangelicals were heroically involved in the campaign to end slavery, a century later, many actively resisted the civil rights movement. According to Paul Weyrich, one of the founders of the evangelical Right, the movement formed in response to "Jimmy Carter's intervention against the Christian schools, trying to deny them tax-exempt status on the basis of so-called de facto segregation." As the government sought to enforce de-segregation, it intruded into the the relatively isolated evangelical subculture, with a sorry result. "Whereas evangelical abolitionists of the nineteenth century sought freedom for African Americans," as Randall Balmer, an evangelical and historian at Columbia University laments, "the Religious Right of the late twentieth century organized to perpetuate racial discrimination."

Most evangelicals today are not consciously racist against African Americans. And in 1995, the Southern Baptist Convention apologized for its complicity with racism. But because evangelicals usually view prejudice as individual, conscious animus toward others, many are blind to the ways in which policies they support systematically disadvantage particular groups. Christian Smith, a long-time evangelical (though current Catholic) and professor of sociology at Notre Dame, co-directed a study with Michael O. Emerson of evangelicals and race in America. "Despite devoting considerable time and energy to solving the problem of racial division," they concluded "white evangelicalism likely does more to perpetuate the racialized society than to reduce it." His study shows that it is possible for individuals to consciously love another class of humans even while unwittingly supporting systematic discrimination against them.

Evangelical history on the subject of feminism and environmentalism also teach us how late twentieth-century evangelicalism has tended to mistake it's own fear of social change for God's will. As the evangelical Right took form, the Equal Rights Amendment emerged as a powerful force for female quality. The popular evangelical press decried it as among the "problems that are tearing America apart today." With many evangelicals interpreting the Bible as teaching female subservience to men, the culture as a whole resisted the movement. Most evangelicals, at least in theory, support some form of female equality today.

Due to a combination of apocalyptic expectations, belief in the dominion of humans over Earth, and the acceptance of conservative political ideology, the evangelical community has been among the most visible opponents of environmentalism in America. Ronald Reagan's secretary of the interior justified complacency because he expected Jesus to return soon and Richard Cizik of the National Association of Evangelicals was nearly expelled from the organization for endorsing climate science. According to a 2007 Barna poll, "Evangelicals stood out regarding their views on the environment. Only 35% said that protecting the environment should be a top priority -- the lowest score recorded among any of the 80 subgroups studied." Most mainstream evangelical leaders now support environmentalism, with even the Southern Baptist Convention declaring "the time for timidity regarding God's creation is no more."

The same cultural mechanisms responsible for the community's past, self-acknowledged blunders are at work today in its response to homosexuality. Evangelicalism still has an orientation against social change, still bases views on pseudoscience, still has a simplistic and overconfident approach to biblical interpretation, and still is unwilling to tolerate those who disagree.

Evangelicalism's greatest failure on homosexuality is not that all evangelicals are filled with conscious hatred toward gays, but its unjustified self-confidence, its close-mindedness, and its egregious failure to learn from its own history.

And that's why "love the sinner, hate the sin" doesn't cut it. Christians are too prone to mistake their own prejudice and fear of social change for God's will. As a result, love cannot only require holding others accountable to systems of morality; it requires reconsidering systems of morality too. Part of "loving the sinner" must be making sure that legitimate desires are not classified as "sin."

 
 
 

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03:31 AM on 12/11/2011
Love the sinner does work..............I know from more than one experience. I have been on the streets where nothing is sure. .....except the power of God.
God backs you up....if in Him.
God has this thing called ME and He is sure of Him self. It is also called trust me above your self.

Try to remember..............God has nothing to loose. So we can trust Him.
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10:25 AM on 11/17/2011
Greatest news of all time is Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners,,,all sinners with all sins, big, small, transgressions, missing the mark, sins of commission or omission, period, and that is because He loves everybody, wants everybody, and accepts everybody regardless of their current lifestyle, activities or beliefs. Truly it is whosoever will may come, once you walk daily with Him you may change you opinion, if not now, don't worry, you will when you get to Him in heaven after your departure from this planet.
05:19 PM on 11/30/2011
What about institutional sins? How can you love someone and deny them an essential connection to another human being? I am Christian and am appalled at what great lengths other Christians go to to create a vision of sin made in their own image rather than take literally Jesus' teachings on sin--denouncing greed, serving wealthy, oppression, exclusion, considering the poor to be "lazy."
07:17 AM on 10/29/2011
It is so strange;
When you show humans who they are in Christ they change their life.

But when you take on the hate........they rebel with pleasure.
Jesus knew what He was doing. By telling people about the Kingdom of God.
Rather than. ..........threats.
Laws with the Spirit of God make people REBEL.
Laws like "War on...."
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jaggeththewires
God said what?
12:33 PM on 11/04/2011
Jesus saith: "Behold I come quickly, and my reward is with me, to give every man according as his work shall be!"
08:33 PM on 10/28/2011
~ I have said it once; yet it bears repeating. The only reason why "loving the sinner and hating the sin" does not work is because "so-called" Christians simply do not love themselves PROPERLY. The Good Book (that you so many claim to live by) does not say to "love thy neighbor IF they live as you do" - it says "love them..."

It is absolutely outlandish and un-Godly to see how so many self-proclaimed "followers of Christ" attempt to by-pass "grace" and take matters into their own hands.

(SMH in despair)
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jaggeththewires
God said what?
12:36 PM on 11/04/2011
Doc Jesus say if you love him you do as he says!
05:20 PM on 11/30/2011
And he says nothing about "homosexuality."
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jaggeththewires
God said what?
06:28 PM on 11/30/2011
So, welove you enoigh to tell you that what you practice is sin and that the Creator fully intends to irradicate sin from the planet in the near future. Seem very gracious of us.
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mrld20
06:14 PM on 10/28/2011
I hope I live to see the day 100 years from now when the Southern Baptist Convention and other Evangelicals apologize for their treatment of gay people... I'm only 20 now so maybe I'll beat out that one woman who lived to be 120 something... I hope I see it! :D
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jaggeththewires
God said what?
12:39 PM on 11/04/2011
Earth aint got that long. You need to repent or you will surely perish! btw: why should we apologize? Yall the ones sinning!
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jaggeththewires
God said what?
12:42 PM on 11/04/2011
When the last time you, apologized to a thief for calling him a thief?
08:56 PM on 10/27/2011
I think that within the next decade, the evangelical community will increasingly begin to taste its own medicine as the oppression they've dished out to others is re-directed back at them.
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StThomas
Not until I see the holes of the nails....
05:37 PM on 10/27/2011
It's All Because (The Gays Are Getting Married)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rixkck8QnjY
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ez duz it
οὐκ ἔστιν θεός
07:08 PM on 10/28/2011
OK! Your link really IS funny! Fanned and Faved. Thanks for the smile....

--ez
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StThomas
Not until I see the holes of the nails....
07:52 PM on 10/28/2011
You're welcome.Fanned for saying "There is no God" in the language of the Neww Testament!
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Reasongal
05:37 PM on 10/30/2011
Wow, LMAO! I have so many people I want to share this with! Hysterical!
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draken54
Don't make me call my flying monkeys
11:26 AM on 10/27/2011
Here is the bottom line. We are here, we have always been here, we are out and we are fighting for our EQUAL rights. You can quote your interpretations as much as you want. It will not stop us. We are not going to be the "End of the World". Unlike you, we do not want to convert anyone to our sexual orientation, we just want the hate to stop and to have the same legal, equal rights.
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Paul Robertson
05:34 PM on 10/26/2011
I've never received a good answer as to why some Christians are so obsessed with non-Christians who commit this particular "sin". Let's look at it from the perspective of Christian doctrine:
Are all humans sinners? Yes.
Can we be saved through good works? No.
Therefore, does it matter whether a non-Christian repents of a particular sin? No.

What am I missing here?
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01:29 AM on 11/05/2011
The Christians that I know don't think much about what non-Christians do or don't do, especially if it does not concern them. But I have a question for you that perhaps you can answer for me - why are non-Christians obsessed with what Christians think is sin? If they are not believers, why does it matter? Is a non-Christian accountable for sin? No. Are they responsible to adhere to the Christian belief system? No. So does it matter whether a Christian thinks something they do is sinful? No.


So, what am I missing?
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Paul Robertson
03:42 AM on 11/05/2011
I'm unclear on why you say that non-Christians are obsessed with what Christians think is sin. If I could paraphrase my original comment it would be, "Believe what you like about homosexuality, but keep it to yourselves."

What non-Christians tend to care about is the ability to live their lives without interference. Many Christians, however, seem determined to enforce their morality on the rest of the country. It's in that context that the Christian view of sin tends to come up. If someone is being prevented from doing something (e.g. Getting married) because some Christians think its sinful, then of course non-Christians are going to be talking about it. Why is this surprising to you?
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01:05 PM on 10/26/2011
"Part of "loving the sinner" must be making sure that legitimate desires are not classified as "sin." That statement by the author in this article is the entire problem. Comparing racism to homosexuality is a mistake because number one, being black isn't a sin while homosexuality is clearly considered so. Brutal slavery was condemned in the bible (Exodus 21:16 and Deuteronomy 24:7) where anyone caught kidnapping, selling and/or violently dealing with people were commanded to be put to death! How many of our American slaveholders would have met their deaths if our capital punishment was similar to the Bible's?

As a black Christian it is extremely offensive to compare homosexuality to my skin color. I was born black and can never ever change that. Too many ex-gays that exist to prove that homosexuality isn't immutable. Yes, there are many ex-gays who are suspect but if you can find even ONE true ex-gay that immediately shutters that theory of immutability.

It was extremely offensive using slavery as an example of 'loving the sinner while hating the sin' because being black isn't a sin while being a brutal slaveholder and kidnapper was a sin condemned to death!
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BeninOakland
Don't tell me you love me. Let me guess.
02:22 PM on 10/26/2011
By the way, as sammy sosa nad michael Jackson demonstrated, a black person can easily change their race.
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02:28 PM on 10/26/2011
No, they became lighter skinned blacks but not white. They did not change their race.
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11:18 PM on 10/26/2011
Michael Jackson did NOT change his race. He had vitiligo, a side-effect of his lupus autoimmune disease. Vitiligo produces white spots & patches all over the person's skin - have you ever seen it? (photos: http://www.google.com/search?tbm=isch&hl=en&source=hp&biw=1452&bih=919&q=vitiligo&gbv=2&oq=vitiligo&aq=f&aqi=g10&aql=1&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=721l1624l0l1905l8l7l0l2l2l0l228l837l0.4.1l5l0)

He first covered up all the spots with brown makeup, but it would run when he sweated during his concerts, and ultimately, the white became more than the brown of his skin (naturally, due to the illness)...This is when he began to bleaching the still-brown portions of his skin, in order to be all one color.

Here are photos of Mr. Jackson with vitiligo prior to the bleaching process: http://floacist.wordpress.com/2007/06/10/vitiligo-photos-michael-jackson/

Would you want to walk around spotted? Most people with vitiligo, when it becomes prevalent enough over their body, resort to bleaching.

The reason we know he did not change his race is that he always said how proud he was to be a black person. Most of the people he worked with, consulted with, and was influenced by artistically were black. The black world was the world in which he lived, moved, and felt most comfortable.

It is cruel that people would continue to say he changed his race.
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TBJ
Irrelevent Blurb
02:56 PM on 10/26/2011
Homosexuality isn't "clearly" considered a sin.

There are not "too many ex-gays." There are hundreds at most, a number that fluctuates with all the 'relapses' that occur.

There's no scientific evidence that ex-gay therapy is effective, and much evidence that it is harmful.

There is not a single ex-gay, though, that can confirm 100% that they have completely created heterosexual desires, while eliminating all homosexual desires. That person does not and will never exist.

By the way, aren't you the least bit aware of the hypocrisy of completely trusting the very, very few ex-gays that say "I'm totally not gay anymore you guys" as evidence, but, when literally MILLIONS of gay people can and do testify that they never chose to be gay, and that they've always been attracted to the same gender (basically, the same personal testimony of the supposed and suspect ex-gays), you're a skeptic?

Sexual orientation is immutable. This is a fact.
Syllogizer
Barely Left of Pobedonostsev
09:29 PM on 10/26/2011
You are wrong in almost every sentence. Yes, it is clearly considered a sin. It is only by using "politically correct" translations which in turn rely on fraudulent 'scholarship' that anyone can hide the clear condemnations of homosexual acts in Lev 18:22, 1 Cor 6:9 and the condemnation of the inclination itself in Rom 1:18-22.

Oh, and when you demand "eliminating all homosexual desires", you are resorting to the fallacy of "moving the goalpost".

Finally, no, what you claim as 'fact' is no such thing. There is no way you or any scientist can honestly claim scientific proof for the claim, "sexual orientation is immutable". Why, ethics considerations make it impossible for scientists to do a double blind experiment to prove it, unless we can talk the Chinese into doing it: we know they don't believe in human rights, especially not for their huge prison population.
12:18 PM on 10/26/2011
Christian history like any selecction of history has two sides. Dudley chose the dark side to suit his own purposes. In my opinion, it was to harm and diminish the total of Christianity while to bolster the position for homosexual marriage. To listen to the “Dud”, Christianity has done little if any good ever – for anyone.

The maxim “hate the sin – love the sinner” works quite well even if some falter in their attempt to fulfill it, or any teaching of the Christ. Christians are not perfect – but should attain to be. It is a journey of self-improvement. No doubt if Christians did not attempt to “help” homosexuals, they would be accused of ignoring/discriminating against them while in their service to others. (Please remember – heterosexuals, just like homosexuals, are admonished to “sin no more”. But all too often in today’s press, just homosexuals are the “victims” while Christians are victimized.)

The people in Dud’s world are quick to see the bad in Christianity while purposely ignoring most/all of the good, especially for journalistic objective. But such are those that make such sweeping assumptions and exploit the past “intolerance” of other groups, only to turn and be intolerant of them, and even their maxims, today.

This hit-piece accomplishes little more than to incite a negative reaction toward Christianity from unthinking readers, and perhaps calm a momentary tingle Dud had running up his leg over the thought of writing it. F minus !
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jbarelli
I don't belong to an organized political party.
01:44 PM on 10/26/2011
Hmmm. Love the sinner. That's interesting.

Love may disagree, even argue, but doesn't belittle.

So your calling Mr. Dudley "Dud" shows love?

(dud: Noun:
1.A thing that fails to work properly or is otherwise unsatisfactory or worthless.
2.An ineffectual person.)

And your comment "a momentary tingle Dud had running up his leg over the thought of writing it" shows your love for Mr. Dudley? Somehow I missed it.

I disagree to some extent with Mr. Dudley. A person of good will can actually love the sinner while still considering what that person does to be sinful, and hating that sin. Those folks may never agree, but aren't being hateful.

The problem I see with "love the sinner, hate the sin" is that most of the folks making that statement do not seem to love the sinner. Their words and actions say quite the opposite, and when they make that statement, they bring discredit upon all of our words.
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erie
We are never prepared for what we expect
04:33 PM on 10/26/2011
Nicely stated Sir. Cannot add one word to it. Thanks, and cheers for upholding civil conversation. F&F
Syllogizer
Barely Left of Pobedonostsev
09:34 PM on 10/26/2011
Ever hear of "tough love"? Your argument that love "doesn't belittle" has no basis in fact at all.

As for missing whether a comment shows love, how many times and in how many ways have YOU missed how love is shown to you? Most likely far many more times and in far more many ways than Michael in his post. After all, if you do not thank God for even the sufferings in your life, you are missing the love God shows to you.
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TBJ
Irrelevent Blurb
03:00 PM on 10/26/2011
"No doubt if Christians did not attempt to “help” homosexual­s, they would be accused of ignoring/d­iscriminat­ing against them while in their service to others."

What!?

Dude, when all the poor, sick and down-trodden are helped to a successful degree by Christian groups, THEN they can try and "cure" gay people. No gay people are asking for their help, except for the few that have had it beaten into them (figuratively or literally) that the thing they have no control over and that in no way harms anyone is going to send them to Hell forever. And doing things like actively fighting against civil rights of gay people is not what I would consider 'help'.
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LintLass
"When you can balance a tackhammer on your head...
03:49 PM on 10/27/2011
Actually, what the straight Christians do is scream if *anyone* helps the LGBT poor they scorn or try to coerce into straightness.
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Dragosurfer
I surf, therefore I am…..
10:30 AM on 10/26/2011
Any person or group that bases their morality, their understanding of humanity, and the important lifestyle decisions on an out-dated, primitive, man-made set of draconian laws (dogma) based on ancient myths and superstitions, is gullible, and obviously ignorant of the real history of their religion.

And by religion in this discussion, I mean the big three Middle Eastern, monotheistic religions.
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Razpooten
Nil homini certum est
12:31 PM on 10/26/2011
Absolutely concur.
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02:28 AM on 10/26/2011
We accept that the earth is not flat. We accept Darwin. We accept lasers and antibiotics. We accept computers and iPhones. So why can't religious groups - christians, muslims and Jews accept the fact that homosexuals are hardwired at birth to be homosexual. Why expect them to spend their lives pretending to be what they aren't. If a homosexual saves your life are you going to say OMG. ahomosexual gave me mouth to mouth resuscitation or are you going to thank him. The gay guys on my street were Christian in their actions. The quasi Christians actions were diabolical tomakethe lives of two gay men so unliveable they had to leave.
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JDuck
Until we know the equal we'll never feel the free.
10:02 AM on 10/26/2011
Dont confuse them with logic; it makes their god mad...
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GDWhiteman
Christian mystic iconoclast
05:11 PM on 10/28/2011
They're as mistaken about God as they are about homosexuality. Think about it. Should that surprise you?
Syllogizer
Barely Left of Pobedonostsev
01:05 PM on 10/26/2011
Because despite the political popularity of the claim, it is no 'fact'. They are NOT 'hardwired at birth' to be homosexual.
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TBJ
Irrelevent Blurb
03:02 PM on 10/26/2011
Regardless of the causation, there is no way to eliminate a person's same-sex attractions. Even most ex-gay groups will admit as much when cornered.
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JDuck
Until we know the equal we'll never feel the free.
06:20 AM on 10/27/2011
What are your thoughts on the 1 out of every 1500- 2000 born intersexed?
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Kathleen Morse
05:44 PM on 10/25/2011
Where do "Keep your religion to yourself" or "Keep your religion out of my Government" fit in? Evangelical christians, in my opinion, have made a mockery out of how Democracy in America chooses it's leaders. When are we ever going to get the fact that religion and government are not meant to mix. I actually think America is the only country in the world that doesn't get that legislating morality is not the way this country was meant to run. If it was the way they claim it was meant to be I'm sure the Statue of Liberty would say, Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses, your christians ...
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Ioan Lightoller
Proud Gay Pagan Man, Living Happily With Husband
07:20 PM on 10/25/2011
My mother always used to say that religion and politics do not mix and boy, she was RIGHT!
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Razpooten
Nil homini certum est
12:36 PM on 10/26/2011
"In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to Liberty." Thomas Jefferson
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jaggeththewires
God said what?
12:27 PM on 10/26/2011
Sooo God instituted marriage. He say it is between a man and a woman. Why come you want government to overturn what God say?
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Ioan Lightoller
Proud Gay Pagan Man, Living Happily With Husband
01:23 PM on 10/26/2011
Because other religions have no hassle with GLBT people. And religion has no place in the secula arena. If you don't spprove of same sex marriage then don't marry someone of the same sex! Yes, it is that simple.
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Valksy
civis mundi sum
07:39 AM on 10/27/2011
Because it is a fictional construct, with as much weight in law as the opinions of Batman.
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conservativewhitemale
Silence is the language of God. Zip it.
04:55 PM on 10/25/2011
Silence is the language of God, all else bad interpretation..
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GDWhiteman
Christian mystic iconoclast
12:20 PM on 10/26/2011
That may be the wisest thing I've ever heard from a conservative - even if it's not original.
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conservativewhitemale
Silence is the language of God. Zip it.
03:14 PM on 10/26/2011
Indeed. Wasn't sure of the source, either Aristotle, or Ghandi?