THE BLOG

7 Surefire Tips for Attracting True Love!

02/10/2015 06:00 pm ET | Updated Apr 12, 2015

"How do you spell Love? You don't spell it...You feel it."

Winnie the Pooh -- A. Milne

Love, Love, Love, Love, LOVE... I could repeat that word over and over again... and each time my mind comes up with a different form of it that activates yet another delicious sense. Love is such a wonderful sensation, but unfortunately so many men and women are really so confused about it. They seem to get in their own way when it comes to finding True Love.

So often I am asked, "Where do you go to find it and how do you attract it once you do? Then once you have it, how can you tell if it's the real thing; i.e. True Love?" Whew, it's exhausting! But as Mark Twain said, "Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired," and who doesn't want that?

But let's get something clear -- no matter what the movies and novels want us to believe, Love at first sight doesn't really exist. Sexual attraction is such a huge part of dating that it's not surprising many of us get confused between what is LOVE and the feeling of Lust, which is an intense desire for someone.

Most people think of LOVE as a verb, "a feeling that is displayed in many varied actions and serves to indicate the occurrence or performance of an action. Certain kinds of expressed feelings that most people experience when in Love." That is a fine explanation, except it's not quite the whole truth.

Yes, it's true, LOVE is a "doing" word that can convey a physical or mental action or a state of being, but that is just too simplistic an answer. Love really originates as a noun that necessarily produces verbs. Love at its source creates it all, including everyone and everything. Our actions are merely manifestations of that Love.

To attract Love you need to understand that LOVE is first and foremost created in your mind. So your most important on-going work is to learn to Love yourself so completely you are never in need of someone else to complete you. Whoever you are and whatever you have done or are doing, trust me when I say, right now, YOU are more than enough just as you are.

Once I realized that the quality and quantity of LOVE I received from others was a direct reflection of how much, or how little, I truly loved and cared for myself, I made loving all of myself a top priority. The moment I began to assume the responsibilities of that job was the moment I began to attract the quality of people who were capable and wanted to love me as I have learned to Love myself.

When it comes to the heart, in order to receive true LOVE from another, it must first be expressed as an action. Behaving lovingly towards another shows that we love that person. When they behave lovingly in return, we feel loved. But just like you can talk loving without really loving, you can act loving without really loving.

Real LOVE, True LOVE, Deep LOVE doesn't want to own, control or possess you. It wants you to always feel supported, honored, adored, cherished and encouraged to be bigger and better. It is the desire to see yourself and the person you care for grow into the best people you can possibly be, no matter what, under all circumstances. So the more honesty and passion you can bring into your own self-relationship, the easier it will be to attract someone who shares those same qualities.

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE... in all its various forms is the greatest of the God-given gifts. It is everywhere. "It is the essence we breathe, the essence of our heart- beat." It has all the power to add to, change, even alter and transform difficult challenges and circumstances into golden opportunities that can make your wildest dreams come true. It can turn a stranger into a life partner and the best of friends. And JOY...my favorite emotion of all, is the beautiful voice of LOVE heard around the world and remembered forever.

Seven JOY-filled Surefire Secrets for Attracting True Love.

1. Start by loving yourself unabashedly and without restrain. Become your most attentive lover and you can attract a true love from want and not need.

2. Open your heart to what's possible. Begin to take down the walls that have "protected you" from receiving the kind of love you desire and deserve.

3. Stop, Look, and Listen for the signs of real love that won't take NO for an answer and keeps moving forward with positive, loving actions.

4. Seek out the best kind of relationship; one where you are not only lovers, but trust-worthy best friends as well. Someone who cares and supports your goals.

5. Make Extraordinary your mirrored reflection. NEVER give your love to anyone who treats you as if you are ordinary. NEVER settle for less than you give.

6. Give and expect open-hearted acceptance. When you feel validated and approved of, it lights up the way for you to walk in the same direction toward happiness.

7. Have enough courage to trust loving one more time, and possibly even one more time again.

They might be right, "LOVE is nothing but a silly old fashioned notion," but it's also the closest thing we have to magic. So "What's love got to do with it?" Simply Everything! En-JOY!