Free Luxury: Help The Rich Learn To Live Like Us
The publications that are thriving these days are those whose readers are wealthy. New York Times columnist Roger Cohen, for instance, just wrote about Tatler, the gossip magazine about the lives of the very rich, which is doing well all over the world.
I read the media favoured by the monied class partly because my work requires it - my speechwriting clients move in these circles, and I need to know what they're talking (or gossiping) about.
However, while they may be reading, they're not shopping. There has been a glut of stories about how the luxury goods market is tanking. A recent Financial Times headline asked, "Was it ever worth it in the first place?" The article pointed out that the credit crunch has caused many to question the value of designer brands. You know, $300 sunglasses, $500 jeans, and $15,000 handbags. (Later that week, I spotted a comment from an analyst advising continued investment in the big luxury brands like LVMH. Why? Because they're going to make a killing in India and China. Likewise, Tatler is doing very well in Russia.)
You'll notice that I peruse this kind of press "partly because my work requires it". I also devour it because I'm fascinated by the super-rich (at least from a distance), and once aspired to be someone who would appear in a glossy spread chatting about my favourite home (because I would have more than one, naturally).
I'm a slow learner, but I have finally cottoned on to the fact that happiness does not, most assuredly, that way lie. That it's just plain crazy to spend my life chasing money so I can buy more stuff. I have this quote from the English poet William Wordsworth up on my fridge as a daily reminder, "Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers."
Instead, I'm pursuing what I think of as free luxuries. And I share this list as a public service to the very rich. Because if they're not out doing retail therapy, they might just be at a loss for what to do with their time. Or wondering what life is really all about.
1. The luxury of time
I've discovered how luxurious it is to carve out an afternoon or an evening with absolutely nothing on the agenda, and out of reach of every electronic device known to humankind. Jon Kabat-Zinn writes about how human beings used to sit around the campfire at night, not some flickering screen. Time really is more than a luxury, it's priceless.
2. The luxury of nature
I start with the weather, because it's always right outside the door. November in the northern hemisphere is a great time of year as the cold northern winds and warm southern currents duke it out: the skies are an ever-changing panoply of clouds and colours. And whenever I go walking in the wind, I remind myself to get it while I can: we're harnessing nature at an alarming rate. For now, the wind is still free.
3. The luxury of customization
The American bespoke shoe designer George Esquivel says that, "True luxury means getting exactly what you want." Amen to that, George. Only my idea of bespoke is being able to take the time I can carve out of my busy life (see #1) and make up what I do with it. I'm not interested in a guided tour or the latest cool place or hottest thing. I'd rather just wander the streets in a rundown part of town, or set off on my bike or in a kayak, making it up as I go.
4. The luxury of contemplation
A friend of mine is raising her grandchildren, single-handedly and without much money. And now, on top of everything else, she has breast cancer. The other day, at the end of a long phone call, this aging hippie told me that she'd recently rediscovered meditation, and what a balm it has become. "And it's free!" she said with a laugh.
Now, over to you. Do your bit to help the super rich weather the current economic storm by sharing with us your version of free luxuries. What's more important than the stuff we can buy, and how and where do you find it? Please comment below, or email me directly at JULIA (that familiar symbol) wearethenewradicals (DOT) (com).
Julia Moulden is on tour, talking about the New Radicals.
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5. The luxury of making someone else happy.
Random acts of kindness are a win-win.
See Anne Naylor's Profile
Beautiful post, Julia!
One luxury for me is taking the time to appreciate the simple pleasures life gives to me. Being aware is a luxury; to notice and luxuriate in the wealth of small things that grace me. Luxury has the meaning of light in it - light as in to see clearly and light as in levity. Nice way to go through life, whether or not super-rich money enters the picture.
Thank you for offering this wider picture of luxury!
Many blessings to you,
Anne
Time is the greatest luxury. Enjoying a silent moment in nature is a joy that is free, at least in terms of money. It isn't always easy for anyone, rich or poor, to carve out time and space for contemplation.
Gardening, cooking and spending time with loved ones are wonderful ways to appreciate life. Being a tourist in your own city can be a revelation. Go to tourist sites and books to discover museums, free concerts, and events. Wander, riding public transit, biking or walking to explore.
God is in the details. Take the time to appreciate them and you will be rich.
See Kari Henley's Profile
Hi Julia!
Great post and we are on the same wavelength! I am writing sunday about how to reclaim spare time. I think everyone is programmed to think they need to reach higher, buy more or just be occupied all the time to be normal. Letting go is a sign of weakness.
I love how the Google folks set up the 10% rule- where certain engineers and execs are paid to take a portion of their week and devote it to their passion, or something not related directly to their daily grind. Many of their greatest innovations have come out of this practice!
Taking time to follow your steps for free luxuries can also be the secret to success- on so many levels!
thanks
Kari Henley
What a great post!
I remember an almost billionaire got in a plane to fly to LA for a visit with me a few years ago. He told me that I was the happiest person he had ever met. Even though he had far more money than he knew what to do with (buying planes was the kick he was on when I met him) he was a very lonely person. He had each of he luxuries and yet he was profoundly empty.
Each of us can have these luxuries on a daily basis. I am a big fan of gardening, dancing, painting and spending time with my wonderful circle of friends. They are all luxuries that deeply impact the quality of my life.
Thank you!
Eli Davidson
Gardening is inexpensive and very satisfying. You get to connect directly with the seasons, climate, weather, soil, insects, worms, food, manure, air, water --- and you develop patience and an appreciation for the miracle of life, and to top it all off, you get beautiful flowers and yummy food.
My kids started this as a Scouts project, and we've done it ever since:
Eat an orange, apple or anything, keep the seeds and plant it. We have tiny terrace, (Apt.) growing a jungle of a garden with Kiwi, 4' high orange trees, watermelon, tomatos....
Of course now-a-days you have to make sure the friut/veg you buy & eat has generational seeds.
The accumulation of wealth at the expense of others is of course not moral. But to understand it, we at least need to understand where it comes from. I admit I'm doing this without citations, but I'm just throwing these ideas out there for discussion.
The behavior of “seeking” is something that's been hard-wired into the human brain since before we evolved as humans. The human organism seeks sustenance, safety, and survival. But some humans are incapable of recognizing “enough”, of recognizing when it begins to hurt other people or the environment that sustains them. This is where the problem lies.
When humans lived in caves, sometimes they were incapable of recognizing “enough”, when accumulating hurt other people, or when it hurt the environment.
It's very simple to extrapolate that to what has led to a global financial crisis, because it's the same human brain with the same needs. Some people cannot recognize “enough”, or when there is a moral imperative to stop accumulating.
As humans, we need to “retrain our brains” to recognize “enough”, and recognize when our accumulating hurts other people and the environment that our sustenance comes from.
At bottom, it's all one big video game that we can't pry ourselves away from. That, in bare form, is the problem. As humans, we need to consciously evolve ourselves beyond that.
Think of a teenager that is incapable of stopping him/herself from obsessively checking their mobile phone for text messages. Then think of an investment banker that is incapable of stopping him/herself from obsessively accumulating “wealth”. It's the same neurological mechanism.
At risk of being negative, I don't think making suggestions like this to the rich is the whole answer. I think that people who don't get the concept of "enough" will continue to try to accumulate wealth, because their brains are addicted to that. This may be the point at which government, which is charged with protecting "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" for the weak as well as the strong (and often against the strong), has to give the strong the message that they now have enough, and they're hurting the weak, and that cannot continue. This is when government protects the weak from the strong by taxing the strong at 90% of income over $1 million a year. Because they're addicted, the strong will keep accumulating, but they will be stopped from hurting the weak, and they will begin to "provide for the common defense and promote the general welfare".
Then the rich can take all the hot baths they want to.
It's like the leader of a prehistoric tribe saying "OK, you got enough. Give to hungry people. Then go take hot bath."
Shhhh...don't tell anyone, but this article isn't for them, it's for us.
No doubt excessive greed will lead to a financial crisis as well. But to explain THIS particular crisis by excessive greed is to let the actors get away far too easily.
If you preach against greed, you will be told that 'human nature being what it is' sermon. Of course greed destroys character and leads to a meltdown eventually, because it's addictive and never satisfactory. But this is not what happened.
What happened is that people were fooled into a totally false and inadequate notion of efficiency and value creation. They were forced into holding themselves and others to absurd standards that cannot be fulfilled other than in self-destructive mode.
The tragedy is that all of this is merely the result of flawed thinking and management, not at all a necessity.
It is the most stupendously superfluous crisis of all time, because it could have been avoided by a proper understanding of the illusory nature of profits that result from an inability of the system to adapt downwards.
In short: the problem with greed is not only that it creates inequality (that's morally disgusting but it could go on forever). The problem is that it blurs judgement and makes fools of everybody, including those who intitially know better. Because at some point it's no longer useful to know better when everybody asks you to 'perform' at these surreal and totally non-sustainable levels.
It's idiocy. What's needed is a jump forward on a par with the invention of agriculture.
There's nothing like a peaceful bubble bath on a Saturday afternoon while the icy January wind blows outside.......
I once had only scorn for rich people who continued to clip coupons and tried to bargain for the lowest price on everything. Okay, I still have scorn for them, but I understand more where some of their neurosis comes from. I've never been financially wealthy, but I've had times where I had enough and more than some people. This is not one of those times. I've become a very creative cook and an astute shopper and I don't see that changing, even if my circumstances improve (hence my new found understanding of some of the wealthy). I am reminded of a slogan from the 1990s - "God, I promise that winning the lottery won't spoil me."
I'm not sure I can promise that anymore, but I do know that I am a generous person and I will share what I have because I already do that, with the little that I DO have.
I have seen how some of these rich people stay rich...they don't part with their money (so tight, they squeak!). Then there are the others who freely donate to charity and watch it come back threefold to them, though that is not their motivation. I call that justice.
For free, the rich might want to try cooking. Its easy, buy fresh ingredients
for a recipe that looks good, smell the basil and the baked chicken in mustard
tarragon sauce, and clean your wine glasses. Not only is the food
good but it is nice to create something with your own hands and
slow life down.
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