To Hell With Random Acts of Kindness

06/21/2008 05:12 am ET | Updated Nov 17, 2011

Have I got your attention?

What I mean by the above: Try conscious acts of kindness with the people you already know and love!

One of the top secrets of happiness: developing heartfelt, loving, deep connections!

Here are the researched facts from Gallup:

* If you feel close to other people, you are four times as likely to feel good about yourself and life.

* People who claim to have five or more true friends with whom they can discuss important problems are 60% more likely to say that they are "very happy."

* People with a best-friend at work are seven times more likely to be engaged in their work! However, unfortunately, only 30% of employees report having a best friend at work!

* People with at least three close friends at work were 46% more likely to be extremely satisfied with their job -- and 88% more likely to be satisfied with their lives!

What's interesting about these career statistics is that many companies actually discourage workplace camaraderie. In fact, nearly one-third of the 80,000 managers and leaders interviewed by Gallup agreed with the statement that "familiarity breeds contempt."

But according to Gallup researcher, Tom Rath, these foolish companies who feel this way are only harming themselves.

"When we asked people if they would rather have a best friend at work or a 10% pay raise, having a friend clearly won," says Rath. "Friendships are among the most fundamental of human needs."

Your assignment:

Today decide to do more conscious acts of kindness for the important people in your life: your paramour, platonic buddies, colleagues, assorted and sordid family members. Remember what you love about each individual, then call them or write them to share your admiration directly. Better yet, invite them out to a dinner of their favorite food group. When sharing a conversation, really share it. Avoid conversation interruptus. Let people finish their thoughts. In fact, from here-on-in decide you're going to listen 50% more. Truly listening is one of the best ways to spoil someone you care about. Fran Leibowitz joked, "The opposite of talking
isn't listening. It's waiting." Prove Fran wrong.

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