In the Know: Scandalous Political Affairs

I know whose bare buttocks have landed on the mahogany desks of certain married congressmen; I've rubbed elbows with high-ranking Hill staffers with porn and prostitute addictions; I've clinked glasses with a girl who wore nothing but rain boots under the Capitol's cavernous dome. In short, I've seen political Washington at its worst.

Political affairs. As the world knows, they happen all the time. JFK got biblical with Marilyn Monroe, FDR had Lucy Mercer engaging in more than just shorthand, Eisenhower played tickle the pickle with Kay Summersby, and Bill Clinton was happy to clarify the difference between sex and oral sex for the entire world.

Of course, it took a little while for these steamy adulterous nights to make headlines. Yet staffers, friends, and the connected were aware of them for years. Mark Sanford's inner circle was queued in about his naked tango in Argentina, and John Ensign's coterie knew he was canoodling with Cynthia Hampton, but who would risk reputation and employment to enlighten the good people of America? Many Washingtonians on the Hill are au courant with their Rep's bedroom lambadas, but it's an ethical dilemma to be the confidant in a headline-worthy affair.

I happen to know the kinds of things Jenna Jameson would high-five me for, but what should I do with this X-rated information? I can't pen a piece about the naked gal in rain boots reclining in the Capitol because we're very good friends. Yes, she drank the Kool-Aid of power, but I still respect her and have no desire to sully her good name. As for the cad she got biblical with, do I want to be the one who ruins his illustrious career, even if it is crafted on lies and deception? The nature of Washington, inside-the-Beltway connections, and a desire to stay out of the private lives of the elite, keeps me, and many others, mum about such scandals.

The alarm could have sounded about the party going on in our political representation's pants many times during the 2008 presidential election, but only John Edwards fell and it was conveniently after he was out of the running. Richardson and McCain were cocooned in rumors of adultery, and amongst Washington insiders there was even talk of Cindy McCain having a lover in Florida, but nothing was ever confirmed. Washington is a small town and its pinstriped-loving people seldom forget a political affair...or the fink who leaked it.

 

Follow Karin Tanabe on Twitter: www.twitter.com/snobbytanabe

Comments

[S1m0n]

Is Larry Flint's million dollar offer still open?

[todayslies]

What exactly is the point of this? You recount affairs we all already know about, and then insinuate you know about more, without naming any names. And since there are no names, no sources, we really have no way of believing this most surface offering of sex gossip.

[HollyR]

Great piece, Ms. Tanabe. I echo the sentiments posted by others respecting your decision to remain discreet. Have you thought about writing a study of men in power and the women who enter their lives? I think you would be great for it and I read all your posts and love your style...so witty and catchy. Hope to see you write longer pieces and books some time soon. I'll keep my eye out...

[Ramolap]

Although your post tickles my political gossip funny bone, I think it’s admirable that you refrain from divulging the names of these politicians (and their suitors). It was widely known among journalists that covered JFK that his voracious appetite for the opposite sex led him in and out of many bedrooms. But, at the time, his sexual exploits stayed out of the news because they, well, lacked elegance. But as time has passed elegance has, unfortunately, only become synonymous with the Anna Wintours of the world and media outlets pay handsomely for stories like yours. Who doesn’t like a fun, smutty, political rumor to discuss over coffee, but since I no longer drink coffee, I commend you for keeping these political affairs out of the media.

[FrancescaItaliana]

Wow. Very interesting piece. You know some hot stuff that could bring down a politician or two. But you also know how to be discreet and protect your sources. In France, for example, a lot of journalists knew about President Mitterand's extra-marital affair but they didn't write about it until after he died. Other presidents of France and other politicians have been rumored to have mistresses but their actions were disregarded unless they used public money for private use or they gave away state secrets. President Clinton's affair with Monica was certainly a private affair that should have been settled privately. But look what the Republican crazies did with that affair. The impeachment hearings cost millions of dollars, much of it public money, and distracted the president from performing his official duties. So you should tread carefully and look at the entire political landscape to figure out what is important and what is not.

[Charlotte Safavi - Huffpost Blogger]

A fun raunchy read! I'm a DC based freelancer and Huff Post blogger. Check out my Green/Iran stories when you get a chance.