Gift Of Love: An Appreciation Of Obama's Relationship With His Grandmother

In an earlier post, we celebrated the relationship between Michelle and Barack Obama. Now, in honor of his grandmother's passing, we want to honor his relationship with Madelyn Dunham and to celebrate the profound effect it had on his life and the lives of all of us.

Because of being raised primarily by his grandmother, Gay had a strong reaction to the moment: "Like many of you, I felt waves of sadness when I heard of the death of Barack's grandmother, Madelyn Dunham. I was in my car, but the feelings came so strongly that I pulled over to the side of the road to honor it until it passed. As the sadness resonated through me, I could feel that it was not only for Obama's grandmother but also for Rebecca Delle Canaday, my own grandmother, whose loving presence in my early life shaped every moment thereafter."

"As I sat in my car, deep in reflection while cars whizzed by on the busy street, I realized something I hadn't seen before: One of the reasons I liked Obama from the start was the quality of the love he expressed for his grandparents. I made a point of learning about his relationship with them, partly because his early life so closely resembled my own. I was born at a difficult time in my mother's life, and when hardship required her to relinquish her care of me, my grandmother was there to take me in. I can't imagine what energy source she drew on, at age 63, to care for a newborn baby, but I know that during my first seven years, the period of time she cared for me, I never once heard her complain of being tired."

"As I gave attention to the sensations inside me, I felt the sadness thaw and melt into gratitude. Of all the gifts I received from my grandmother, there's one gift that affects me as deeply today as it did 60 years ago. Wherever Barack is today and whatever he is feeling, I bet he also is feeling grateful for the same gift. It was the gift of love, a gift that continues to open and flower throughout life. Because of his grandmother's love, Barack Obama could attract as remarkable a woman as Michelle into his life. Because of my grandmother's love, I was able to attract as remarkable a woman as Kathlyn into my life. Because of his grandmother's love, Barack could run a positive campaign that inspired hope in the lives of hundreds of millions of people. Because of his grandmother's love, he could show us something we very much needed to see again: Proof that love could overcome fear, not by fighting against it but by embracing it in the wholeness of love, and by so doing liberate the exploration of a new galaxy of creative possibilities in the world."

Wherever Barack is in the world today, he knows that he would not be there without his grandmother's presence in his life. Wherever he is in the world today, millions of us join him in feeling the deep sadness of loss, the warm glow of gratitude for Madelyn Dunham, and the joyful celebration of a life that gently and with no fanfare would change the world.

Click here for a slideshow, photos and video of Barack Obama's grandmother, Madelyn Dunham.

Click here to see Barack Obama speak about the "bittersweet" death of his grandmother at a rally in North Carolina, Monday night.

Follow Kathlyn and Gay Hendricks on Twitter: www.twitter.com/GayHendricks

Comments

[wakeup804]

I feel the same way about my "Grammie". I lost her 7 years ago, and I always tell people, if I can be 1/2 the woman my grandmother was, I will be one hell of a woman. She was the best, so full of love and goodness, all wrapped up in her old fashioned way. They don't make them like that anymore.

[My2cents4u]

I feel the exact same way, having been raised by my grandparents. I also relate to having grown up in a foreign land, and having my faith registered as my new father's being too young to have an opinion of my own. I know that due to this type of upbringing we learned unconditional love, respect and humility. I wish I could find my soulmate so that I might become as complete an individual through the gift of sharing as he has. It brings a tear to everyones eye when seen. I now have high hopes for our country and the world... how refreshing!

[llisa]

I, too, was saddened by the passing of Obama's grandmother--so close to the triumph of her grandson. And I imagined him feeling as I did at the death of my father--like a middle-aged orphan who had lost the one who was my loving guide throughout my life.

He is the guide now, not only for his children, but for an entire country. I do not envy him.

May his grandmother's love continue to guide him.

[munki]

So proud of a lady... believed in America...
Tonight... President-elect Obama took hands of Mama Biden...
He showed his respect - inside him... wished his grandma was there...
But he also knows... she is living inside him...
the strength and believes she taught him...
what a touching story...

[WFV]

Toot, you surely did a great job. You can be so proud. Thank you.

[Waitingon4th]

I cried as I read what my fellow American, Authorship, wrote. I realized the more I looked at Senator Obama the more similar our influences were. We both lost our Mothers too soon, and were raised by our very strong Grandmothers. A lot of children who experience the loss of a parent become more aware and more sensitive to the power and frailty of our loved ones. You don't hold back your feelings; you express them. You do draw people to you that recognize these qualities, and usually your children and grandchildren are the same way.

Some will always look at his family, and think that they are everything that they wish their families could be. What we will not see is his precious Grandmother, but she will always be with him. Our Grandmothers didn't have to rear us; they chose to. Without complaint! Each of our Grandmothers instilled the very basic, but least expressed emotions, that make us who we are. We were well loved and well taught. Ethics, or what we were told, right and wrong mattered. It was what made you who you were, or what you had wished you had been. What reporters I hear say "Good Midwestern Ethics."

Thank you Madelyn and Dena for making us who we are. We are forever grateful!

[authorship]

Well expressed mutual sentiments! How strong a bond love builds against ragged divisive chains of fear!

Where love is, as it has been, is and will be - as we have observed and perhaps experienced personally - there is an elevation far above the desperate clawing of hate - examples of both we have been witness to in this campaign. For our phenomenal next president, it is a memorial to the beautifully remarkable woman, Barack Obama responded to, that caring spirit he has affectionately called 'Toot,' as he continues embracing her guidance of love's wholeness, using its inspiration to aspire to unusual, illustrious & elevated eminence that otherwise that may have languished, leaving credence to 'the hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world.'

While I too have had a sad heart (especially considering the bond between my lost grandma whom I often grieve), I am buoyed and gratified by what love and guidance of a young soul has produced, as observed in its richness in my beloved Senator Obama's, Grandmother Dunham, whom many now gratefully know as a flower who'll never fade.

I join in thankfulness to whatever elements destined Senator Obama in our midst at a time for our battered nationally, globally disrespected country. May our incoming President OBAMA bind wounds as only love, intellect, training & receptivity to aspiration of good can accomplish.

In celebration of her humble, prodigious influence, long live (the spirit of) 'Toot!'

[authorship]

Well expressed mutual sentiments! How strong a bond love builds against ragged divisive chains of fear!

Where love is, as it has been, will be - as we have observed & - perhaps experienced personally - an elevation far above the desperate clawing of hate - examples of both we've been witnessed in this campaign. For our phenomenal next president, it's a memorial to the beautifully remarkable woman, Barack Obama responded to...that caring spirit he affectionately called 'Toot,' as he continues embracing her guidance in love's wholeness, using its inspiration to aspire to an unusual, illustrious, elevated eminence that otherwise may have languished, giving credence to 'the hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world.'

While I too have had saddened heart (especially considering the bond between my long lost grandma whom I so often grieve),I'm buoyed & gratified by what love & guidance of a young soul has produced, as observed in the richness of my beloved Senator Obama & to Madelyn Dunham, whom so many of us now gratefully know as a flower who will never fade in our own memory.

I join in thankfulness to whatever elements have destined Senator Obama to be in our midst at such a time for our battered nation & globally disrespected country. May our incoming President OBAMA, & his well-chosen staff, bind our wounds as only love, intellect, training, wisdom & receptivity that aspirations of good, can accomplish...right person for our urgent times.

In celebration of her humble, prodigious influence, long

[UnderdogSRD]

Madelyn,
I proudly voted for your grandson today. Unfortunately, he faces more challenges than any other POTUS. But we believe and know that he is the right person at the right time. Our country is at a crossroads, and I know the American people will rise up and cast their vote. Not because we just need change, or the economy, or the war of choice. But because your grandson is the rarest type of leader, not just inspirational, but transformational. It exudes from every word and belief, a L5Leader - someone who serves others, who sees the big picture and what could be, what should be, and how to get there. This is rare, especially in politics, where ego and power often contradict what is best for our country as a whole. A wonderful opportunity is before us - to live up to our American Legacy, not just for our country, but for our kids and our world. I believe in your grandson more than I have believed in any other person in my lifetime. Please watch after him, because this world is still a dangerous place for those who want change and who believe in people, in all people. I wish you were here today to see and, to hear the stories from all those that your grandson has inspired. The only things that I can do, is to thank you and do my part, like your grandson, to make the world a better place, for all of us.

[MongoSlade]

There's a memorial page hosted by the American Cancer Society if anyone wants to leave their thoughts or make a donation in her memory.

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR?pg=fund&fr_id=9910&px=8684889

[Starr69]

Thank you for that link. It is a meaningful way to acknowledge this woman's life.

[moodyring]

your post helped me both celebrate barack's grandmother as well as grieving for and celebrating mine. thanks.

[Kong2008]

Thank you Obama for being family oriented and showing family values. We need this kind of leadership in America.

[parise]

i too was crying last night.obama reach this far because he is a geniune person and is grand mothershape him that way.

[dac253]

Hey Madelyn, I just voted for your grandson. I hope the view from where you are is really good. Aloha nui loa -Doug

[collegemadhous]

Thank you for writing this piece. It was so very eloquently written, reading of yours and Obama's connection by way of your grandmothers, made me cry. I know that somwhere, wherever you both are, your grandmothers are looking over you both with pride and love for the men you have become. Thank you again.

[GHendricks]

Thank you for your kind words in saying our grandmothers are looking over us with pride and love. Reading that brought tears to my eyes. I feel her presence every day of my life.