Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes... the ones who see things differently -- they're not fond of rules... You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things... they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do. ~ Apple's "Think Different" campaign.
I want to start by telling you a simple story, a story of corporate America gone wrong. I am a senior female executive at a worldwide advertising agency. This past week, I witnessed something from our CEO which I'm sure you've all seen before. In this particular occurrence, a light bulb went off for me. I realized how inefficient Mr. CEO's behavior was in reference to the most important factor in our modern economy: innovation. I will not use my name here so as to sincerely state the details and furthermore connect the dots on how this behavior leads to an attenuation of our best talents and passions.
Last week, I had a conversation with Mr. CEO regarding the structure of our organization and why inefficiencies in the structure were leading to sub-par work US-wide. My job in the organization is to breed creativity US-wide and push the entire ship into emerging technologies and new digital services. At some point in the conversation, my voice broke. I know. I know. Your inner monologue just took over and you're now looking at the screen aghast. A senior female executive whose voice broke? Disgusting right? No. Furthermore, Mr. CEO translated this occurrence to our HR department by stating that I was in fact "sobbing on the phone." So, rather than doing what could have been assumed and feeling mass embarrassment, I felt angry. Angry at the lie which was shared and angry at the assumption that I was breaking apart at the seams.
Over the holidays, I read Walter Isaaacson's biography of Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs, the greatest visionary of our time, was a massive crier. If I played a drinking game while reading the book and drank whenever he cried, I'd be face down by the end. So, here we have the greatest visionary of our time, a crier. Not only did he cry, but his second chain in command of senior male executives also cried. He cried when he was fired from Apple, the company he built. He cried when his Apple employee badge listed him as #2 rather than #1 which went to his co-founder Woz. Why? One of the tenets which fashioned Steve Jobs into the innovator of an era was his incredible passion and attention to detail. Were it not for this passion, Steve Jobs would not have had the balls to 'spit in the face' of Michael Eisner at Disney and demand things be done differently. He wouldn't have asserted himself in a completely new category and taken the music or cell phone market by storm. Passion is a double-edged sword. It drives us to true greatness. It can also cause us great pain when things don't go according to plan.
So, back to the moment where my voice broke, and my CEO translated that as sobbing to our HR team. Since the moment we women watched Samantha rush to cry in the hallway away from prying eyes on Sex and the City, we have assumed we should supplant our natural female instincts. This is wrong. I'm not advising crying in boardrooms across corporate America but I am saying that it is OK when a critical moment causes passion of some kind. I'm not limiting this statement to women alone. Men, your natural reaction to moments like this, could be frustration in the form of anger. This is also OK. Again, I'm not saying that we should fly off the handle or cry with reckless abandon. I am saying, though, that in moments of extreme frustration, a break in step should not be flagged as a failure. Passion breeds creativity and creativity breeds innovation. To supplant these behaviors or recklessly call them out as ultimate dysfunctions diminishes what is most critical in companies across America: innovation. So, you know what, here's to being labeled a 'crazy one.' I certainly am not a genius but I am a passionate change agent. Steve Jobs' crying moments have taught me that this passion can cause pain but that's OK. Without a down, there is no up and in between is just average. So, go on. Go get excited, get passionate, and don't chastise yourself when things go wrong and you feel pain or anger.
Signed,
A crier. A senior executive. A human.
Baby Bargains
cry when you get home. cry in your car. cry in the bathroom. go for a walk outside.
crying is the same as tooting; everyone does it, but not at work in front of everyone.
yes, occasionally one will slip out...but don't make a habit of it.
I just lost someone very close to me tragically and have to fight back tears while I sit at my desk sometimes.
But I don't cry, because the world would never forgive me. Consider yourself lucky.
We got along famously we broke every rule known, we talked about religion nonstop, we talked about politics, we talked about candidates processes everything.
We didnt always agree and I loved him for having a fluid curious and educated mind. Of all the conversations we had I'll never forget this one the most.
I asked him what do you think the differences are that impact you the most from living in your country and living here in America ?
He said, "...Americans have everything, they have luxuries of the imagination, they can be anything, they have free sexual expression, they are extremely hard working, they have great burdens and no time.....they have achieved their goals but in the haze of the war to acquire what they thought they wanted they lost their souls and forgot whats really important so their lives are not lives at all......."
He was right. We're losing our way.
I've said this before and I'll say again - it may not be the born American who saves this country but foreigners who still believe in our founding fathers ideals. We must be careful not to be arrogant towards the people who may just save our souls.
Regardless of gender, emotion in every form is integral to every human being. We have all somehow been conditioned to unequivocally accept that "incorrect" expression of this essential aspect of all of us is something that will lead to failure and destruction. Yet, as you point out in the case of Steve Jobs, the opposite is nearer the truth.
Where did this self-defeating and ultimately growth-retarding paradigm originate? It might be wise to consider the humanity of those who most vehemently perpetuate the myth that certain forms of emotional expression denote weakness.
Do we really believe that the only way to have an orderly society is to repress all emotional expression that falls outside this narrowly drawn paradigm? How does the impetus behind negative - yet implicitly excusable - expressions such as violence, war and bullying fit into this restrictive design for acceptable human behavior?
We already know the answers, all that is needed is the courage to withstand the brief and lonely period of being labelled "crazy" long enough to see the old paradigm dissolve into the nothingness from whence it came.
It's as if men EXPECT women to fall apart, so they pigeonhole us and use it to their advantage. Ask yourself, "What advantage did he gain by representing me as 'sobbing' to HR?" I think he's insecure and sees you as competition. He had an opportunity to belittle you, and he took it.
And my guess is that despite the fact that Steve Jobs cried, you don't want ever to be perceived as a "sobbing" female again. However, when you are passionate about what you are doing, it's hard not to expect emotions to surface when you're frustrated.
Those who don't have that passion for doing their job to the ultimate of their ability have no need for a perfectly health, normal and human outlet--crying. It's like a balanced scale. Passion that weighs heavily on one side has to have an outlet on the other side to balance that passion. If that means tears, so be it.