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Keli Goff

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The Gift That Trayvon Gave All of Us

Posted: 03/27/2012 8:27 am

There is no perfect thing to say in the wake of a tragedy, particularly one that involves the loss of a young person. Entire etiquette guides are devoted to telling us what not to say when someone is grieving, with "I know how you feel" being at the top of the list. And yet there is something oddly comforting about such clichés, causing many of us cling to them like a life raft during tragedy, especially when our own grief, shock, and anger has rendered us incapable of forming the words that those most affected by the loss really need to hear.

Besides offering the family of Trayvon Martin my sincerest condolences, and letting them know that like much of America they remain in my prayers, I am going to ignore the etiquette guides for a moment to say something else: Regardless of what happens to the case involving their son, his death was not in vain and will ultimately save countless other lives.

Months ago I wrote a piece titled, "Is Racism Worse in the Obama Era?" In it I discussed the psychological impact of subtle racism, a subject covered in the book Who's Afraid of Post-Blackness? In the piece I also briefly touched upon my own experiences with subtle racism. (As I, and plenty of friends have learned, what walking down the street in a hoodie is to black men, walking into the wrong store with the wrong skin color is to black women.) The reaction to the piece was fascinating, with some weighing in with their own experiences. Others, however, were livid that in the age of a black president "people like me" would still find something to complain about and my complaint is about discrimination that you can't even see or touch, let alone prove.

The fundamental question raised by the column was whether or not subtle racism is actually far worse, and more dangerous, for that very reason. As I noted, in my parents' generation (they both grew up in the segregated South) a store simply hung a sign that said "No Coloreds" allowed. Today a store wouldn't dream of doing that and yet most black people I know, and most black celebrities have a story (often more than one) about being blatantly denied service at a store due to race. In the case of Oprah Winfrey on two separate occasions at two different stores the stores in question locked the doors and claimed to be closed when she attempted to enter. In the case of Condoleezza Rice, a sales clerk questioned whether she could actually afford the jewelry she was eyeing. To those who have never endured such experiences, they may sound like minor indignities. But the Trayvon Martin case illustrates how easily subtle racism -- which usually involves racial profiling -- can escalate from indignity to death.

One installment of CNN's "Black in America," hosted by Soledad O'Brien, actually noted that many black parents are so conscientious of such profiling that those with teenage boys often provide them with a prepared speech for interacting with police officers to avoid them becoming another Robbie Tolan, the unarmed Houston teen shot by an officer who mistakenly believed Tolan had stolen the car he was driving. (He hadn't.) O'Brien noted that this unofficial profiling speech is so pervasive within the black community it cuts across class lines. From working class black Americans to A-list celebrities, many of them consider the profiling talk just as important, if not more so, than the birds and bees talk.

Trayvon Martin is a powerful reminder of why. Only who knew that we would come to a point where the profiling "talk" would have to be revised by parents to not only include police officers, but any man who may see you as a so-called threat because of the color of your skin. (On that note, some critics have blamed Martin's attire for his death. See my reply and others, here and here.)

Which brings me back to the legacy of Trayvon Martin. Much like Emmett Till's racially charged murder in 1955 at the age of fourteen forced our country to finally confront the brutality of Jim Crow as more than just a "Southern problem" but a national shame, my hope is that Trayvon's death will spark long overdue outrage and ultimately, a movement against, the subtle racism known as profiling that has risen in Jim Crow's wake.

The fact that so many people of diverse political persuasions have condemned his killing gives me hope. I pray that this, and the lives he may ultimately help save, give his family peace.

It is cliché to say in times of tragedy, "I know some good will come from this," but in this case I believe it to be true. I have to. We all do.

Keli Goff is the author of The GQ Candidate and a Contributing Editor for Loop21.com where this post originally appeared.

 
 
 

Follow Keli Goff on Twitter: www.twitter.com/keligoff

There is no perfect thing to say in the wake of a tragedy, particularly one that involves the loss of a young person. Entire etiquette guides are devoted to telling us what not to say when someone is ...
There is no perfect thing to say in the wake of a tragedy, particularly one that involves the loss of a young person. Entire etiquette guides are devoted to telling us what not to say when someone is ...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Claude Hosch
A single bracelet does not jingle
07:33 PM on 03/28/2012
I pray that good comes from his death.

As fo rsuttle racism; I was to meet a friend at the furniture store he worked for at a set time. I walked in, looked around and didn't see him and hastened out (left two small kids in the car: didn't leave sight of the car). Went home and began to work on my lawn mower: cops pull in the drive, ask if I'm me, then asked why I walked in the store and right back out. My question was, why do you need to know that? Their answer: I seemed to be in a hurry.

For him to know my name and address the ladies, (that smiled and spoke) in the store had to look outside and get my tag number (parked at the entrance). That was in the late '70's, being black and walking in and out of a store singled me out.

The attitude hasn't gone anywhere; its time it did. My fear is that with recent gun laws, law abiding citizens will arm themselves for fear of everyone, and utter madness will ensue because a shooter can claim self defense without question..
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
tc71087
05:28 PM on 03/28/2012
This article says it all. This murder is a breaking point, we cannot return to this.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
scituate
12:43 PM on 03/28/2012
Is this a recent picture the Martin's are using of their son? He looks like a little boy. I don't know how Mr. Zimmerman could have been threatened by him. He should have been taken in and investigated. Hopefully law enforcement will get to the bottom of this.
11:51 AM on 03/28/2012
Keli, thank you for driving the narrative in the direction it needs to go.
GHO
Sooner or later you run out of other peoples money
08:46 AM on 03/28/2012
Though the media and the race-baiters of the world keep trying to paint this as racial and a hate crime, I remain unconvinced. I don't believe that Zimmerman's actions were dictated by skin color. Remember, as reported here just a couple of days ago, this was his 46th 911 call - yes 46th!! Were the previous 45 all about black people? IMO, Zimmerman is not some bigot running around looking for blacks to harrass and shoot. He's a pathetic cop wannabe so desperate for recognition and glory that he appoints himself neighborhood watch, straps on a gun, and goes out at night literally looking for trouble. The 46 911 calls suggest that, like Don Quixote, he sees threats (and thus the opportunity for said glory) everywhere.

Getting back to race, why is Zimmerman frequently referred to as a "white latino"? When have you ever head anyone else referred to as such? And if it were Zimmerman who had been shot by a caucasian, do you think he'd still be called a white latino? You can bet then that the story would just be "white shoots latino".

Everything is not racial. Everything is not a hate crime. Some people just have issues and exercise lousy judgment regardless of skin color.
HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
GeorgeBurnsWasRight
My micro-bio is running on empty.
09:09 AM on 03/28/2012
Where did you find out how many of Zimmerman's previous calls to police were about minorities? You seem to think you know that.
GHO
Sooner or later you run out of other peoples money
10:02 AM on 03/28/2012
I don't know and I've not suggested I did. I ask the question - though I suspect that if each and every call had been to report someone black doing something "suspicious", we'd have heard all about it by now. That we haven't at least suggests the calls are a mixed bag.
11:18 PM on 03/29/2012
Zimmerman was a minority race himself.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
LaFemmeSASE
02:53 PM on 03/28/2012
There are white Latinos. Its just that Americans with limited history knowledge wouldnt understand that concept. The Latino population consists of whites, mestizos (white and indigenous indian), indigenous indians, blacks and those of various combinations of all the above.

There is also a growing Asian minority within Latin America as well.

Your last statement I agree with however, but I dont think it applies in this case.
GHO
Sooner or later you run out of other peoples money
04:21 PM on 03/28/2012
Yes, there are white latinos. That was not my point. Point is - when have you ever actually heard of someone referred to as a white latino in a news story? Probably never. It is being done in this case to further the narrative of "white man versus black kid".
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truthBtold99
Millions without jobs, still no economic agenda
08:27 AM on 03/28/2012
Crime that involves elderly Caucasian women perpetrated by someone other than Caucasian never gets called hate crimes and you never hear race enter the scenario.
Every incident doesn't have to be because of race.
08:06 AM on 03/28/2012
From the foolish and false comparison to the Emmit Till murder to the focus on a shooting involving a white (actually hispanic/white..oops not supposed to say that...) person and a black person, these discussions are more interesting for what they don't say than what they say.

Juan Williams editorial in the paper this morning is really on point.

The vast majority of black men who are murdered in this country are murdered by other black men. Yet that story goes unreported.

Time we asked ourselves why Trayvon is all over the news, but black on black crime doesn't get a peep.
HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
GeorgeBurnsWasRight
My micro-bio is running on empty.
09:12 AM on 03/28/2012
"Time we asked ourselves why Trayvon is all over the news, but black on black crime doesn't get a peep."

Two separate issues, both worth exploring. Failing to look at why violence among poor people receives little media attention doesn't invalidate looking at racial (and other) profiling.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Dan Slander
07:12 AM on 03/28/2012
Perhaps you need to look inward and re-examine what you perceive as slights and acts of racial insensitivity. Whites wearing hoodies in temperate conditions are also profiled as possible troublemakers.

I understand the dynamic however and as facts are being revealed it will be more than clear both men made very bad choices.

As I see it Zim profiled Tray and attempted to intimidate. Tray's rage at the slight and I can't blame him for it but it sounds like it he may have over reacted and sucker shot Zim from behind unaware the guy was carrying. The rest is a shameless tragedy of two prideful men ( I just can't call a 17 year old a child) who over reacted.
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IdeatoEmpire
Let's have a retirement party for 535
06:47 AM on 03/28/2012
Just because a troubled Latino man killed a black young man apparently without good reason does not mean that the killer was racist or that the shooting was racially motivated. Those are two possibilities, but there are many others.
HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
GeorgeBurnsWasRight
My micro-bio is running on empty.
09:14 AM on 03/28/2012
It's hard to argue that Zimmerman wasn't profiling.
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IdeatoEmpire
Let's have a retirement party for 535
10:11 AM on 03/28/2012
I don't disagree with you at all. But profiling what? He's the type who sees trouble everywhere. But I don't think there's any question that the police and the DA's office have a lot of splainin to do.
06:40 AM on 03/28/2012
I think we talk about race too much. My parents generations were prejudice, mine a lot less, and my kids show no signs of it at all. We have made boatloads of progress in this area. Prejudice runs both ways. Not every bad deed is based on race as some would like us too believe.
06:23 AM on 03/28/2012
The sad thing is that if quick-draw Zimmerman had done what he was told this child would still be alive. There was no need for a confrontation at all but in my opinion Trayvon was forced into fighting for his life when he knew that he was being followed by a man with no badge, no uniform, no police car and no identification. Zimmerman was told not to follow this person but he went against orders and stalked young Martin. I fear that they will find a way to let Zimmerman go uncharged.
08:15 AM on 03/28/2012
Zimmerman was never given an order.

The legal definition of stalking means following on more than one occasion, so it was not stalking.

Zimmerman said he DID stop following Martin, and was walking away when Martin initiated the attack. One witness saw Martin on top of Zimmerman, pummeling him.
03:36 AM on 03/28/2012
Before jumping to conclusions and trying the case in the media..new revalations about the case have come to light. A new witness and the fact that Zimmerman had a broken nose and cuts on his head back up his story that he was assaulted.. Also the victim had been suspended from school for drug use.
04:36 AM on 03/28/2012
I think we have all heard the new revelations. Blaming the victim is always a convenient way to make things fit in a neat little box. The reputations of rape victims were smeared and how the victim dressed used to be used to attack victims in courtrooms. The point was, Travyon was in his parent's neighborhood. He was not involved in criminal activity at that time. He was unarmed. He is now dead. Zimmerman hunted him down. Zimmerman was told not to follow him and yet he got out of the safety of his car to confront Trayvon. Use of Marijuana is not indicative of violence. Now, if it came out that he was suspended for violence against others, that may be relevant.
08:16 AM on 03/28/2012
"Zimmerman was told not to follow him and yet he got out of the safety of his car to confront Trayvon."

There is no evidence Zimmerman initiated a confrontation. None.
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truthBtold99
Millions without jobs, still no economic agenda
08:48 AM on 03/28/2012
The media is controlling the narrative in this case, portraying Martin as a nice lil kid constantly showing photos of Martin when he's 12 yrs old and rarely showing photos of him when he was 17. The most current photos of Martin show a different demeanor and physical changes of a more grown up Martin.
Other info never discussed in this case.
Tweets and posts about attacking a bus driver are never mentioned. Drug pipe and bag of shake. Burglary tool and women's jewelry in his possession. Skipping school, spray painting graffiti
HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
GeorgeBurnsWasRight
My micro-bio is running on empty.
09:18 AM on 03/28/2012
Wow. You sure have a bunch of "facts" in your last paragraph that no one else knows. You must listen to a lot of talk radio.
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kennethhdeome
Why can't both sides be wrong?
02:21 AM on 03/28/2012
My apologies, Kelli, but I'm sick & tired of all these people blaming the victim for the choices and actions of his killer.

Unfortunately one thing we've learned from all of this is that when good people object to subtle, or overt, racism all the other "I'm not like that" people come flying out of the woodwork...to defend the alleged racist, of course.

Keep up the wonderful, positive work and let people who aren't as kind meet the enemy at his own level.

I've actually always enjoyed a good patch of dirt to play in...
01:56 AM on 03/28/2012
Can you say Duke lacrosse?