Bush: The Great Uniter

I was fooled. If you're honest, you'll admit you were too. Prior to 9/11, I thought George Bush's excessive vacation days indicated that he was lazy and uninvolved. After 9/11, I believed he was exploiting the tragedy to jam his right-wing ideology down America's throat. I was convinced he tampered with the facts in order to con the nation into war. Attacking Iraq was meant to prove his was bigger than his father's, and I'm not talking brains here.

No doubt the administration's intimidation of most Democrats, moderate Republicans and the press was designed to help him hand the country over to the minority of Americans that are extreme right-wingers. I was of the impression that his short-lived grandstanding in the Terri Schiavo tragedy was additional pandering to those fanatics. His response in Hurricane Katrina deepened my belief that his unbounded narcissism had come to make empathy and compassion impossible for him.

However, I see clearly now that the ignorance, arrogance and complete lack of decency he's exhibited have all been part of a giant ruse. Just look at his polls. When can you last remember our nation agreeing on so much? Give credit where credit is due. George Bush is uniting us. His willingness to let the world think he was clueless, uncaring and at times, downright evil was brilliant. The man has taken one for Team America. I am heartened by my belief that his incompetent decision-making, which I now realize is just part of his unbounded selflessness, will continue bringing us together.